Family Rejection

Discussion in 'Dealing with Prejudice' started by Addolorata, Aug 25, 2012.

  1. RaiderLL

    RaiderLL Well-Known Member

    Do the men you date ever get upset that your family doesn't know about them? I think I'd be a little hurt if my SO kept our relationship from his family just because of the fact that I'm white. I've dated guys whose family members were less than thrilled that they were dating a WW, but I've never dated one who kept me from their family because of that. In my eyes, if he can't stand up for our relationship, what kind of relationship do we really have? I happen to come from a very open family so I'm sure it's easier for me, but if my family didnt accept my boyfriend/husband just because he's black, they'd lose their relationship with me. Sounds harsh I'm sure, but hiding him from those I love just isn't an option in my book. I'm just curious how the men in your life have handled it.
     
  2. suzieb

    suzieb New Member

    I haven't really had any of that yet, but if I did get any of it I would just laugh at the idiots.
    No opinion matters so much to me that I will let it effect me that way.
    There will always be ignorant gits in this world.
    My white ex tried a little bit to do that, but only because he is fiercely jealous, and for very good reason! I just laughed him off because he's a dick.

    Of course, again, I haven't had to listen to any serious rascism because of my relationship with my gorgeous black man, so I can't say for sure how I would feel and react deep inside but I would never ever allow a person that would do that know they had got to me.
    I am fiercely anti-rascism, and have always brought that down on my children very hard, even way before I dated a black man. It is something I cannot stand, and will not listen to.
     
  3. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    I have a white boyfriend and we're doing the "hotwife"-thingy. Never dated a black man :)
     
  4. Tamstrong

    Tamstrong Administrator Staff Member

    Then why are you here? This is NOT a cuckold, "hotwife", or interracial fetish site.
     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2013
  5. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    Because I don't like those sites. Too many strange people writing strange things in even stranger threads. This site felt more real and pleasant.

    If I'm not allowed here because I haven't dated a black man, then I'll leave.
     
  6. Tamstrong

    Tamstrong Administrator Staff Member

    No one said you weren't "allowed" here. I was just asking why come here if that's what your interracial interest is all about.

    TBH, I find the whole cuckold/hotwife/IR fetish thing offensive and disgusting, especially when that's what some people reduce interracial relationships to. That mentality takes something very beautiful and special to myself and many others and turns it into something ugly and trash, which is something I don't appreciate.

    If that's what the whole interracial thing is about to you and/or that's what you're here for, then IMO you're in the wrong place. There are sites that cater to that crap.
     
  7. Ches

    Ches Well-Known Member

    This!

    The cuckold thing objectifies a BM, imo. Just makes him little more than an experiment. :smt009
     
  8. Unique4ever

    Unique4ever Well-Known Member

    I'm not trying to attack you, but are you ashamed that you are attracted to black men?
     
  9. suzieb

    suzieb New Member

    can I just comment that those ''strange'' things on those ''strange'' sites are exactly what you are saying you yourself is interested in!

    I don't understand the whole cuckold thing myself. I am 100% loyal to my partner and would never in a million years want to sleep with someone else. And to do it while my partner watched?? I'm sorry, but that to me is a very very ''strange'' way to live!
    I could not be with a man who wanted to pass me around to other men.

    But of course, each to their own. What anyone chooses to do with their lives is none of anyone elses business.

    This isn't an attack, its just I don't really understand how you don't want to be on certain sites when you are wanting to live the life they portray?
    I'm just interested because I don't really get it.
     
  10. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    Because I don't like the objectification of either black men, white women or white men. To many seem to float around in fantasy-land and therefor reduce it all to strange fetishes.

    I have a white bf and I do like being with black men in and outside of the bed. That would qualify me as a "hotwife" if I understood it all right. But, don't think I'm like a lot of "hotwives" out there, because I'm not. I'm digusted by how white women, black men and white men are being reduced to their skincolour and a very stereotypical view on how they are, what they should be and what they shouldn't be.

    The difference between us (I think) is that I haven't dated a black man since I'm in love with my current bf, whom I have an pretty open relationship with. That being said, I've never ever been with a black man (sounds like I've been with many... Been with 2), just because of what's between his legs. I've met both of them a lot outside the bed to and really enjoyed their company.
     
  11. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    No, I'm not.
     
  12. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    Exactly, that's your choice that you took according to your preferences. I did the same! I am being "loyal" to my partner (what that really means?) since we're both in on it. Being loyal isn't a physical aspect if you ask me, it's an physiological.
     
  13. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    Most importantly, I feel like people here are for real.
     
  14. suzieb

    suzieb New Member

    Well thats what I mean, we all have different things we want in life. I suppose I'm very traditional and 'old fashioned' if you like.
    Loyalty to me personally is within every aspect - physically, emotionally, mentally.
    If two people are happy and satisfied, and not hurting anyone else or each other, then their life choices are their own business, and thats fine.
    I'm just saying that I personally struggle with the idea of that dynamic, and I could not even begin to imagine doing anything like that.
     
  15. Angelika

    Angelika New Member

    If you'd ask me about a year ago I'd probably have a hard time imagine it to. But things change, people change!
     
  16. fantasyfangrl

    fantasyfangrl New Member

    I was disowned by my father, but that wasn't much of a loss. When I had my daughter, my siblings (all but 2) tried to get me to give her up for adoption because she was biracial.

    She is now 17 and loved as much now as she was when she was born. I basically told my siblings and father to fuck off. I was not about to give her up for adoption just because her father is black and I am white.

    I went for 14 years not talking to most of them and have to say my life (as well as my kids) has been better without most of them.

    To others who are facing issues like this, I have to say that you are grown and shouldn't live your life for anyone but you!
     
  17. RestlessRita

    RestlessRita Well-Known Member

    Good for you and shame on your family. Your daughter is lucky to have such a loving mother. Believe me, this is THEIR loss!!
     
  18. fantasyfangrl

    fantasyfangrl New Member

    Thank you so much Rita!! :heart:
     
  19. arbncdt1

    arbncdt1 Member

    It is never good to have to sever ties with your parents and family, especially over issues such as this. No matter what, everyone loses something. With that being stated, moving forward with your life, in spite of this circumstance, is quite admirable.
    Blessings to you and your daughter.
     
  20. longhairblondie

    longhairblondie New Member

    Fortunately my parents have been very supportive of mine and my 3 sisters (all of whom are older than me and also dating or married to black men and btw I have no brothers) having sexual relationships with black men. In fact not only do they support it but think it's wonderful that me and my sisters choose to have relationships with black men instead of white men. The fathers of the black men I have dated as well as the one I'm married and unfortunately soon to be divorced from have all been very supportive too. Unfortunately the mothers and sisters of the black men I've had relationships with were almost always strongly opposed. It seems that they're jealous of beautiful blonde haired blue eyed white girls like me and just can't stand to see them with there men. Of course I don't let it bother me. In fact I often laugh at them because it just goes to show how much more beautiful and attractive to men of all races I am then them.
     

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