What is the Worst Racial Experience You Have Had as a Black Man?

[The Dark King]

if you dont mind me asking, how tall are you?

this shit right there... especially by my home... lets just say someone would be limping back to their house and it wouldn't be me.

Lol you implying if he were bigger they wouldn't do that shit?

 

[RaiderLL]

Will anyone else weigh in on this? Have you ever heard anyone else accuse another black person of "acting white"? I never have. Doesn't mean it never happened but I sense that idea is waaay overblown and gets too much play.

I've heard the phrase "whitest black guy" and "acting white" many, many times. It was almost always white people saying it though, not black people. When I've heard it said, its been to black men who are into alternative rock type of music (I think that's what it's called??), skateboarding, bmx bike riding, etc. I heard it more in high school...never really as an adult. I used to ask my friends if it pissed them off when someone would say that and it was always a mixed bag of answers. Some took it as an insult and would fight back, others understood it to be an ignorant comment that didnt warrant a response.

In all fairness though, it goes both ways. As a ww, I've had insensitive racial remarks made to me numerous times, based solely on the type of music I listen to. :roll: Stupidity at its finest

I think it's crazy that some people are so closed minded to think that if an individual steps outside the stereotypical ideal of their race, they're "trying to be something they're not". My favorite people are always those that don't try to conform to the status quo...fuck what others think, you do you. Jmo of course

 

[Black Male Dancer]

Well okay. I'm not going to try to deny your experiences. I know how frustrating that can be when it comes to racial stuff, which everyone wants to deny ever happens.

However, implicit in your answer is a little of the "pat myself on the back for not being like those other black people" stuff that I alluded to in my post.

Maybe I'm being dense, but I can't imagine someone making it clear to you that because you "have a college degree and a good job, don't sag my pants, call people 'nigga' and perpetuate other stereotypes" they say to you, a grown man, that you're "acting white". That would be quite the bizarre conversation.

Still, I'm not where you're from, so you get the benefit of a doubt from me.

I live in Tennessee. The south hasn't changed much. Not sure if you read my posts about my wife's family or my current neighborhood. If so that'll sum up the kind of people I'm around. I've got neighbors who run in the house every time I step outside the door. It's disgusting but it's real.

I've had conversations with many conservative white people, some who are older. When I tell them I published a book, interviewed celebrities, etc, they have the same wide-eyed reaction. They expect me to be selling drugs or to have 15 baby mamas or something. The thought of a young black man doing something with his life is unfathomable to them. People are hung up on what they see on TV. To them, when you act the stereotype, you're acting "black." When you act like a normal human being, you're acting "white." I'm assuming you live somewhere where people are open-minded. I wish like hell I could say the same.

 

[The Dark King]

Well okay. I'm not going to try to deny your experiences. I know how frustrating that can be when it comes to racial stuff, which everyone wants to deny ever happens.

However, implicit in your answer is a little of the "pat myself on the back for not being like those other black people" stuff that I alluded to in my post.

Maybe I'm being dense, but I can't imagine someone making it clear to you that because you "have a college degree and a good job, don't sag my pants, call people 'nigga' and perpetuate other stereotypes" they say to you, a grown man, that you're "acting white". That would be quite the bizarre conversation.

Still, I'm not where you're from, so you get the benefit of a doubt from me.

I'm from liberal ass NY and have heard that bs pretty much my whole life. From blacks it was always some kind of insult to laugh about in "harmless" jest or from whites who were giving back handed compliments. When I was growing up there were no cool black nerds all we had were Urkel and Carlton Banks so if you weren't Wu Tang black you were Urkel

 

[Beasty]

I can relate to that. I was hired sight unseen by my boss and she just knew I was gonna be a white guy. When I walked in everyone was shocked that I was black. I'm a journalist and I guess they figured a brother couldn't write intelligently. (My boss is black, btw).

I could write a book about some of the racial crap I've been through. We actually live on a street full of white supremacists and are in the process of moving away. Initially I didn't wanna move because I didn't want anyone to run me out of my home, but after so long it wears on your spirit, especially dealing with it in your own home.

Sometimes I'm scared to step outside the front door, and we have one set of neighbors who play racist Johnny Rebel songs so loud that I hear it in my house. We got the police involved several times and it's useless. They apparently think "racism doesn't exist" and I'm just "another paranoid black man." Man it's a long story. This is the edited, made for TV version. So much has happened and we've only lived in this house since September.

Also, it took 7 years for my wife's parents to finally accept me. But by the time they did, I didn't care anymore. lol. When they met me and my family for the first time, they said that we were nothing like they expected. Of course not! You can't believe what they show you on BET.

I would, cut the grass, trim the bushes, plant flowers, do some work around the house with one of these on the hip.

Learn the gun laws of your state and have peace and tranquility at home like you should in the south.

 

[medullaslashin]

I've heard the phrase "whitest black guy" and "acting white" many, many times. It was almost always white people saying it though, not black people.

I wouldn't doubt that. I would imagine that some would even say it as a compliment (or a backhanded compliment), or just to see how the black guy would react.

But black people saying that? I think that idea is seriously overblown, especially the one about black kids equating studiousness with acting white. Black kids are not all geniuses, but I think they would come up with many other descriptions of that before they'd call it "acting white".

I'd bet it originated with a black kid who simply preferred to be around the white kids, and then put words in the mouths of the black kids who resented him/her for the social preference.

most black kids don't hold white folk in such high regard as to associate all things positive with them, especially not as blatantly as that. That stereotype really saddens me because it makes blacks seem sooo stupid, yet after a while, (once it got media attention) even blacks began to repeat it and spread it. Good lord, we are vulnerable these days :!:

 

[buglerroller]

Lol you implying if he were bigger they wouldn't do that shit?

in a way yeah.

 

[The Dark King]

I would, cut the grass, trim the bushes, plant flowers, do some work around the house with one of these on the hip.

Learn the gun laws of your state and have peace and tranquility at home like you should in the south.

Until some asshole uses it as an excuse to kill you because they were in "fear" for their lives

 

[medullaslashin]

Unrelatedly -- I remember once reading some (white) pundit state that black people identify with bart simpson because he's rebellious and an underachiever.

My bullshit detector sprang to life. What kind of survey was that? Can you imagine black people saying something like that? And in numbers enough for him to make that crazy generalization? Yet it was right there in black and white, in national media

A lot of times people presume to know what black people think, so much so, they don't have to really hear them say it.

We're just so easy to know like that, that people can presume things, and as long as it's negative, everyone believes it. Like the "black kids equate academic achievement with 'acting white'" meme.

 

[The Dark King]

in a way yeah.

Then you my friend live in a happy bubble because the bigger you are the more justified in their fear of you and the more understanding they'll get for putting you down ie Treyvon Martin

 

[Beasty]

Until some asshole uses it as an excuse to kill you because they were in "fear" for their lives

Good luck to that asshole, he is going to need TONS of it!

 

[medullaslashin]

I'm from liberal ass NY and have heard that bs pretty much my whole life. From blacks it was always some kind of insult to laugh about in "harmless" jest or from whites who were giving back handed compliments. When I was growing up there were no cool black nerds all we had were Urkel and Carlton Banks so if you weren't Wu Tang black you were Urkel

damn, how do you guys speak? I speak proper english generally, but no one would accuse me of "sounding white" or "acting white"

I doubt if anyone could mistake my voice for a white man's, even when I'm trying

Name a celeb who might be accused of "acting white" based on the way they speak... I need an example. Al Roker?

 

[Black Male Dancer]

damn, how do you guys speak? I speak proper english generally, but no one would accuse me of "sounding white" or "acting white"

I doubt if anyone could mistake my voice for a white man's, even when I'm trying

Name a celeb who might be accused of "acting white" based on the way they speak... I need an example. Al Roker?

It's not so much your tone or anything. For me it's the fact that I don't use hip hop slang. A lot of people expect us to talk "hood" or "ghetto." I just talk normal and that gets me labeled as "sounding white."

 

[MilkandCoffee]

damn, how do you guys speak? I speak proper english generally, but no one would accuse me of "sounding white" or "acting white"

I doubt if anyone could mistake my voice for a white man's, even when I'm trying

Name a celeb who might be accused of "acting white" based on the way they speak... I need an example. Al Roker?

RG3 was accused of that.

To weigh in on the subject, I too have been told that I "act white". I've been told by blacks, whites, asians, etc. Technically I am half white (portugese) but I still don't take it as a compliment of any kind.

 

[The Dark King]

damn, how do you guys speak? I speak proper english generally, but no one would accuse me of "sounding white" or "acting white"

I doubt if anyone could mistake my voice for a white man's, even when I'm trying

Name a celeb who might be accused of "acting white" based on the way they speak... I need an example. Al Roker?

Then I guess you're living in a good little bubble because every bm I know who has diction and articulation with an education who dates any woman who isn't black or hispanic sounds/acts white.
Having any interests outside of hip hop or jordans is another reason for people to accuse you of that. Up until very recently being black was considered a monolithic experience homie.

 

[pettyofficerj]

RG3 was accused of that.

To weigh in on the subject, I too have been told that I "act white". I've been told by blacks, whites, asians, etc. Technically I am half white (portugese) but I still don't take it as a compliment of any kind.

Ur biracial

Since when

 

[pettyofficerj]

Then I guess you're living in a good little bubble because every bm I know who has diction and articulation with an education who dates any woman who isn't black or hispanic sounds/acts white.
Having any interests outside of hip hop or jordans is another reason for people to accuse you of that. Up until very recently being black was considered a monolithic experience homie.

Don't make fun of bubble boy

 

[Apollonia]

I remember reading a black woman say that "we" (meaning black women) have been told we're ugly all our lives. But when pressed for specific incidents, she only could cite one thing some kid said to her when she too was a little kid.

I've been black all my life, and I find it hard to believe that you get people telling your "all the time" that you're "acting white". Frankly speaking, I think this is something that people imagine other blacks say about them (while patting themselves on the back for speaking proper). They imagine it to a point where it becomes real to them, like the black woman saying that black women are told they're ugly all their lives.

Not to attack you, but the idea that black people deride things like speaking proper and academic achievement as "acting white" smells to me like an internet myth that has taken on a life of its own.

As I said, I'm black, and I'm a student of black culture, and I believe I'm pretty objective regarding black culture and understand that it is far from above criticism and it could use whooole lot of work. But that one really sounds fake to me

If you "get that all the time," what are the circumstances? What kind of people could you be around that you would get that all the time?

I just cannot imagine that you're simply speaking english and putting your best foot forward and blacks are coming out of their mouths telling you you're "acting white", unless (maybe) you're an elementary school kid plopped down in the middle of ghetto classmates

I also speak proper english for the most part. (whatever's most precise, expressive and appropriate is my policy) and I have NEVER been told that I'm "acting white".

Of course that doesn't mean no one has, but it saddens me that black kids have to face (baseless?) stereotypes that sully their intellect like that, especially the one that says they accuse studious kids of "acting white"

Will anyone else weigh in on this? Have you ever heard anyone else accuse another black person of "acting white"? I never have. Doesn't mean it never happened but I sense that idea is waaay overblown and gets too much play.

I don't know about explicitly being told that bw are ugly but it is the message when "our" beauty is often not recognized or acknowledged by the society in general. (I could elaborate....but I won't)

Black Americans who speak SAE (Standard American English) being told that we "act White" or "speak White" is a fairly common occurrence and is generally a SES/class issue when it comes from other blacks and particularly the ones who speak AAVE (African American Vernacular English).

 

[The Dark King]

I don't know about explicitly being told that bw are ugly but it is the message when "our" beauty is often not recognized or acknowledged by the society in general. (I could elaborate....but I won't)

Black Americans who speak SAE (Standard American English) being told that we "act White" or "speak White" is a fairly common occurrence and is generally a SES/class issue when it comes from other blacks and particularly the ones who speak AAVE (African American Vernacular English).

100% well said love

 

[MilkandCoffee]

Ur biracial

Since when

I said it on here before I'm sure.