Double standards

How come black men risk sounding like an uncle ruckus,or an uncle tom if we state that we want light skinned women,yet a black woman can name all of the "light features" she wants and nobody will usually call her out on it?
For example,ive heard black women int he past talk about how they liked light skinned brothers with green eyes and etc,but when a black dude said that he liked light skinned women with diff color eyes,he was called a sell out and an uncle tom.
Also,ive heard white women before talk about how they wanted "pretty biracial babies".
LOL do you know how a black man would look if he said something like that?

 

What's wrong with that? biracial babies are pretty, so are fully black men, one doesn't exclude the other!

 

Yeah it sounds ok if a white woman is saying it,but it sounds akward when a black dude says something like that and hed surely be called an uncle tom for saying something like that

 

Well i dont think it sounds ok when women say they want pretty brown babies, it sounds so............small minded like the only thing a mixed race child has to offer is looks, which in all honesty is not true ive seen plenty of ugly kids some of whom happen to be mixed race.

I didnt have my children because i just wanted mixed race babies i had them as an exspression of love for my husband, when i hear someone make a comment like i want mixed babies because they are cuter!! its just strikes a note of WRONG

I bet there will be a few who use the preferences thing, ie id prefer mixed babies, but a child is a child.

Plus ive noticed in another thread that the word Mullato has been used, i personally find this offensive, as its a word derived from Mule ! and to me feels like a definition off mongrel or something just as bad, its not a word ive heard spoken outloud here in Europe but if a whitewoman referred to my kids by that definition in my presence id straight up smack her ! sometimes the ignorance is overwhelming on here as ive seen no one else pull up this term, or is it because only a handful have mixed race kids ?

So yeah i see you point Maikom, there does seem to be double standards in all areas, sometimes it does seem like other peoples non pc views are breezed over and its not fair that only one group is only held accountable to exsplain themselves

 

Do you really care much about what people think about you, though? You can do everything people want and they will still judge you on it. You will never live up to the expectations of others, so don't even try. You live one life, so just make the most of it doing you.

 

yep

 

I fully agree with everything you've written here. Anyone, man or woman, who wants mixed babies because they're cute, are incredibly shallow, and should rather get a puppy.

Mixed children are children.They break things, make a lot of noise, and get sick, just as other children. You shouldn't get one because they're cute. They're not exotic accessories, nor should they be treated like they are.

And yes, some of them are "ugly" too :lol:

Btw, if you don't like "mulatto", what do you think of half-breed? That has also been used on this forum - by a regular, not a troll...:smt088

 

I guess it would be offensive if she said "little brown babies" that sounds worse than what I thought Malkom intended. But I never heard of Mullato being an offensive term, maybe I am more naive than I thought. Here in America Mullato was almost considered a race of it's own for a while.

 

I'm going to agree with Francie and Ronja on their comments. I certainly didn't have any of my children out of "cuteness". I just happen to have been blessed in that all of my children are beautiful.

I was going to say something at one point but I get sortof sick of some who think Im some sort of PC police...actually that amuses me given how NOT PC my life is.

Tink - over time there have been all sorts of terms that were ok at one point and not at another. Mullato is one of those. But then too there are many who take issue with the term "mixed".

I think often times it becomes a different thing when we have our own children and are dealing with some of these things first hand.

Back to Malikom....what I find interesting is that it has been black men who have said such things to me along the way though. Some of us sortof touched on this on another thread...wondering why it is that men get into the thing (and often right off) about saying they want to have babies with us and the different terms they use.

Interestingly enough....when I was going through all the adoption stuff I learned that there were quite a few black couples who would request biracial children and/or light skinned babies (as if they would know how they would come out and/or as if the light or darkness of the skin at birth will determine how light or dark later on)

 

Well what do i think of Halfbreed as a term used by someone on this board, im gonna say im disgusted and if thats how they ref a child or anyone they should not be on this board!:smt092

And like you Ronja, i think all the shallow hals out there should get a puppy

 

I would think that if anyone is so shallow to have children just for what they may (or may not) look like, then they shouldn't be having children anyway. I doubt that many people just have biracial kids for that reason. Or..at least, I hope there's not that many. :S

But, Malikom. I would say that if you want to say that you want biracial kids because they're cuter, then just say it. Who cares, really?
As has been previously stated - people will judge you for anything and everything anyway...I imagine that it would really depend on the intention behind your comment. If you are just stating that biracial kids are cute, then there's nothing wrong with that.

Perhaps it's also got something to do with the fact that women, generally, are going to be the one's who coo coo over babies...and men, generally, aren't..So, to hear any man say "i think XXX is cuter in babies"..is a little weird, really. I can't imagine my dad, for example, checking out my mum and saying "uh-huh....blonde curly heads from this one, they're so much cuter". Just seems too weird. But, women think about that kinda stuff, well some women.

The term Mulatto is kind of weird, but I don't think it's offensive. As stated above - surely the intention behind the word is kind of important. I'm sure there are many mulatto people (in fact - check out youtube) that use the word to describe themselves. Personally, it just sounds awkward to me, and I'd never heard the word until I started reading about IR in an American context...but, hey...

Maybe just let people know that you don't like the word...but I would assume that most people would be ok with it, and until there becomes a consensus on the status of the word (as with n*gger) and whether it is ok or not to use it, then it's up to each individual I guess. Can't blame people for using it when there's no "rule" so to speak.

At the end of the day, some people find one thing offensive, that others dont care about, and vice versa. I would imagine that when you have biracial children (or children that are anything outside the majority norm for the area) then you need to be aware that other people don't get it, and just know when it is or isn't the right time to pick a battle...and what you will and won't tolerate. Just my 2c worth. This is how I will look at stuff if/when I have kids.

 

I'm just a brotha who loves him some white women and I'm not ashamed. I wish a muthaf__ka would call me out on it.