Your idealistic and realistic partner matches?

Shut up smartypants
But there is a difference between people who are born with a certain level of intelligence but never go the chance to go to college etc., and those who are intelligent AND are well educated.
Maybe he means intelligent and well educated?

 

I guess it's a case of I've never seen it so to me it doesn't exist. People are incredibly impatient and selfish for the most part so I really have a hard time seeing how anything can last

 

An intelligent,hardworking,ambitious woman who speaks her mind but is respectful,knows what she wants in life. Physically,I would like her curvy either average height to tall,and with a couple of tattoos and in the age range of late 20s to 40s.

 

No.... such relationships do still often exist. It's a matter of putting priority on a relationship, also often determining if it lasts or not. I always advised people that if you want to preserve anything you have in your life, including a relationship, you need to maintain it. You maintain your car to keep it in good condition, so if you care about your health, prioritize it, if you care about your relationship, prioritize it.

Often life gets in the way, because its hard to focus on 1000 things at once and do them all well, but I believe that if someone has found someone worthy of their attention, and wants to keep them - to simply consciously de-focus some other areas of life, and use the reserve energy for the relationship.

All things are possible when you put your mind to them - i.e. FOCUS. It's just that people try to do EVERYTHING that is expected of them well, scattering their energies inefficiently. That's imposible, its like trying to be superwoman or superman. I think the problem with a lot of people these days IS as you said ADHD, but its IN GENERAL... and which unfortunately spills over to relationships too. It's our current m.o. It's a highly ingrained, chiseled in mindset for a lot of these younger people. Fast life, fast turnover, fast thrills, fast food, fast service, instant gratification etc etc etc. But if you find someone who you see is able to keep good focus IN GENERAL, chances are they are a good candidate for good focus in a relationship as well, with a huge caveat... that they be currently desiring a relationship. Make no mistake.

That's just my conclusion based on observations of people....

 

I don't have a preference in physical appearance, my 1-10 is only for his character, his manners, how he takes care of himself, his self-confidence and whether I can respect him and his decisions, whether he is intelligent/ wise or a fool. At the moment I can say, I've found a number 9.
A 5 or 6 I wouldn't accept, I can live alone, no problem

 

Have you ever had the problem of incompatibility because the other person needs a lot of energy and attention to keep the relationship going, and you don't? I don't require a lot of attention to stay with someone, but sometimes you can be in a relationship where the level of need is unbalanced between the two.

I can live alone too. That feels just as comfortable as being in a good relationship, but both are preferable to being in an unhappy relationship.

 

Yes, I'm pretty sure that was an incompatibility in my marriage, lol. My ex needed immense amounts of re-assurance. It was exhausting.

 

Absolutly...if you try to make a compromise, it can only fail..everyone has its special, unique needs, his/her own expectations and imaginations. If most of them aren't satisfied you will get in trouble with your partner or your partner tries to change you. After a while you'll get nerved and the end of the relationship is near. If I say a 5-6 I would never have a relationship with, then it's not arrogance or that I think this person isn't worth enough, it's more the experience that it doesn't make sense and the acceptance that people are different and not all are made for me.

 

Ideal: a good father. Realistic: sexy loyal best friend who slings and needs me to pay his utilities

 

Sold. When can we make it happen lol

 

I concurr

 

What did I get in the deal? Realistic or ideal?

 

Realistic, I am no one's ideal lol :freehug:

 

Me neither. What's your ideal btw

 

Could you be a little more specific?

 

What happens after 6? You've really put some thought into this

 

Well recently just got out of another relationship so at this point if you just respect my time and my money and we're attracted to each other that's all I need. Good credit wouldn't hurt either lol

 

I understand. Non-needy and intelligence are my biggest issues. I can be with someone who weighs 200lbs, as long as she is smart and isn't needy. But it totally takes the experience and self-knowledge that failed relationships teach you to figure that out, unless you have extraordinary self-knowledge and insight.

I feel your pain. Did the same thing.

Haha, you accepting applications?

 

Haha, you accepting applications?[/QUOTE]

For the ideal? Yes.