Why is it necessary to live with a spouse

its is fiscally better to live with someone because you will have set of expenses. the thing is will they work with you(especially if you are married). for some people they are better off living apart than together and still be married. it just depends. Im more of the living together but Im moving toward the other side of things. It really depends. nothing is black and white. no pun intended.

 

I don't have to go to prison to know its not for me nor did I have to college to know it was for me before I started. I'm just suggesting another way to look at it. Marriage shouldn't be a rigid set thing because if it was people like you and your husband would have never been allowed to get married here nor people of the same gender. Even though there were droves of people arguing that sex with the same race or opposite sex was the only right way to do things.

 

Imo there isn't anything you're supposed to do in a relationship. I take care of myself and you take care of yourself and we enjoy our lives together. I guess I'm incapable of what most of you feel is so simple and natural. All the fighting and all the negativity surrounding matrimony has left me weary. I just want to make my mark in life and have some kids. Companionship never seems to be worth the price you pay. Rarely if ever.

 

I'm beginning to see that romantic love seems to be a drug that causes illusion. I've never witnessed mutual love in my life. Someone is always dissatisfied and/or cheating. People rarely compromise. I believe in family and obligation kind of makes me wish I had been born to a culture that believes in arranged marriage.

 

despite the fact that people hate your position...I respect it. why ? because you are honest with yourself....when you are honest with yourself You should be able to live an honest life with whom you are with.

a woman can respect a man who is str8 up with her from the start.

 

Agreed. Honesty's where it's at

 

DK...your attitude towards relationships is very sad.

 

Sad or realistic?

 

You have an extremely bitter view on relationships. Thank god its not mainstream (and no, its not realistic, really. The fact that almost everybody on here disagree w you on that should tell you that your view is not the realistic one, its a very negative one).
You have a right to it though

I think this exact view of relationships is why many marriages fail.
People who have this view and expect it to work in a marriage with anybody.
Ergo, marriage eventually fall apart because the relationship is not tended to. It does need work, effort, sacrifice etc or it will eventually die.

The good news is that you are honest about it and then marriage is not for you in general. I hope you find a woman that mirrors your view and you get that to work, they are out there.
Alternatively, you actually really do fall in love and your view changes.. either or.

 

Sad. Not realistic.

 

You remind me a lot of my ivy league friends and the debate we had about occupy wall st.
A lot of them have this callous attitude of just go out there and find a job ignoring the fact that the system currently works for them and everyone in their circle but fail to see that its really hard for those who aren't as fortunate. Its easy to say just don't get married or leave the current system alone when it works for you but don't ignore the bigger issue.

 

Imo, you have been poisoned by your reality, your environment. If most of what you know is broken relationships, cheating, etc., your view of love and marriage is going to be skewed. I, on the other hand, am surrounded by couples who have been married 25 years or more. They survived everything from infidelity to illness to financial hardships. Even though my marriage didnt survive, nor did a relationship that I thought would end in marriage, I still believe in real love, commitment and marriage. I am sad that you don't have that hope.

 

I never said anything like that and I don't think like that. I know finding love is hard for some, that's not even an issue here. I'm not telling you to go out and be in a relationship, no one is. I don't know about anyone else, but I couldn't care less what you do with your life. Do what you want, it's none of my business. I just disagree with your attitude towards love, relationships and marriage. Just because love can be hard to find, doesn't mean your view is realistic. It's still a sad, jaded view to have.

 

Fair enough. We agree to disagree then.

 

Ches keep your pity to yourself kid. Im fine lol. I respect life for what it is. I don't need to lie to myself.

 

come on DK. Im hoping you were joking rite?

 

Noted.

 

I think that when you want to have a family best is to live together it is better for the kids and both can see the kids grow up and share the moments..
if you have good understanding you can have a free time and plenty of space from each other .. can have different hobbies and even at home no need to be in the same room 24/7

but nothing wrong for couples that want to live separate if they can make it work ..