Why do men primarily do this to their ex's??

I mean, this man has DEVASTATED his ex's entire family. He executed a generation of daughters! And for what?? I don't get the logic...how many times do I and others utter, 'why can't they just kill themselves"??! This makes me sick!

 

It's a sense of ownership - that she isnt ALLOWED to leave and make her own life. (see: Feminism). It's a very common thing.

The rate of murder of women by a significant or former significant other is appallingly high.

 

Yeah that is simply awful. My heart goes out to the family.

And the reason some men do this is because they are royally fucked up in the head. Most likely have severe mental problems/disorders which if gone untreated can lead to violence (like this horrible tragedy)

 

Men do horrible things and murder their families. Women do horrible things and murder their children. Insanity is an equal opportunity disease and it affects people of all ages, races and social backgrounds.

 

In the words of Wunwurd...

Abhorrent.

 

Thank you for saying this sir. Rep on the way. Wish the fair minded feminists would have point this out.

 

Im sure you will have to sit down and really dig to find out the truth. you may never know why.

there is always three sides to every story....his side, her side and then truth.
Too bad they will never get justice because he killed himself. coward

 

Thank you. I don't see the merit of assigning blame in cases of horrific crimes based on the sex of the perpetrator. Obviously, such people are in the minority and have significant mental problems. IMO, sexual politics plays less a role in these crimes than their psychological abnormalities. I think that it becomes divisive to conclude otherwise and it doesn't lend itself to a greater understanding between women and men.

 

it gets down to power and control mixed with the thin line between love and hate

 

Exactly even though I admit that I do it at times and need to only apply it where it is necessary and not make it the over all theme to my arguments which quickly breaks down communication.

 

The numbers are vastly different, though. No one is denying that women can go crazy and do violent things, but the vast number of intimate partner killings are by men on women. Three women a DAY in the US are murdered by intimate partners.

http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/intimate/ipv.cfm

http://www.scribd.com/doc/3679320/About-Domestic-Homicide-and-MurderSuicide

According to the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reports, 1,055 women and 287 men were
murdered by their intimate partners in 2005

It's also interesting that back in the 70's the numbers were more equal. The number of women killing intimate partners has dropped and not the men.

http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/homicide/tables/intimatestab.cfm

I dont have stats on why, but I suspect that more women leave rather than kill because some of the killing was retaliatory or seen as the only way out in domestic violence situations, and there's far more options for leaving today....however the consequences of doing so have increased the number of women being killed.

 

Assigning "blame"? Or point out a statistical fact?

What you're purporting is that in cases of domestic violent murder, the fact that the ratio of who kills who is INSIGNIFICANT and unworthy of exploring why because to acknowledge it ..." doesn't lend to an understanding between the sexes".

You haven't even bothered to consider a link except to introduce that women kill their kids (despite the fact that that point is neutralized because so do men - the issue here is men murdering their ex's when they want to/ leave them), and then you add that insanity is the reason. Many men in Arabic countries murder their wives who want to leave them and its perfectly legal in some. Trust that they are completely sane in a medical sense.

I will not give this man a pass and blame it on mental illness, particularly since he forewarned his children to leave the premises and executed in cold blood his WIFE's family.

So indeed there is absolute merit in assigning spousal "blame" (as you call) if a pattern has emerged - which it has. If for example, 8 out of every 10 domestic murders or murder/suicides are committed by the male, then the question ONE MAY LOGICALLY ASK is... 'why is it that men primarily do this to their ex's?"

 

But, isn't it just as true that women kill far greater numbers of their own infants and children? Do we draw a conclusion that women are less loving parents than fathers, or men in general?

My point is that I think numbers don't tell the stories in either case, There are a myriad of reasons that are as complex as our relationships with one another and with families. I would favor a closer look at the "whys" rather than the number of occurrences.

 

Ironically I did a term paper on this (on spousal abuse and murder)...and I kid you not, I was up at 1am dotting i's, crossing T's to hand it in when across CNN's news wire came the report that the a woman's body was found slain (it turned out to be Nicole Simpson's...little did we know what was to come, smh).

Honestly, the figures I was encountering in my research back then were staggering..I can't imagine what they are now.

As you pointed out, sense of ownership is very plausible...in India, many of the very common facial acid assaults are committed so that no future man will find her beautiful and she will not be able to re-marry.

It happened in London recently too, he had his buddy do it...





After many surgeries...

 

Hope you are factoring the murders fathers commit on their kids when they execute their whole families.

 

That is just horrifying.

 

Actually, I think it's about 50-50 where parents are concerned. It's because we think mothers should never do so that we hear more about it when they do. http://www.slate.com/id/2063086/

Twice as many fathers as mothers committed filicide-suicide during the study period, and older children were more often victims than infants.http://www.jaapl.org/cgi/content/full/33/4/496

I think you have to look at numbers as well as whys. It's pretty clear that most murders period are committed by men. It would be nice to live in a society where murder and violence are much rarer, and we do need to understand why. But part of the why is connected to the numbers.

It's also clear that the whys differ by gender. Men who kill their children tend to kill as a result of spite - if I cant have them, no one will, while women, who typically kill infants rather than older children, often kill out of either post-natal psychosis or out of a sense of hopelessness, and sometimes, like in the case of the woman who killed her 5 or 6 kids a few years back, untreated schizophrenia. In that case, Andrea Yates had been under treatment, and her husband had been told she should have no more children, but he insisted.

I'm not letting women who kill their children off the hook - it seems clear from the research I did that it's a 50-50 proposition, but it seems rare that women kill out of a sense of ownership, and men often do, whether we're discussing partner or filicide.

And that right there is one of the reasons we still need feminism - to rid the world of that idea that men own their wives and children. I suspect that if that were eliminated, so would the cases of filicide not attributable to mental illness be reduced dramatically.

 

You are reading things that aren't in my post. I plainly stated that my belief is based on a view that sexual politics is less the issue than the mental state of the people committing the crimes.

I suggested that I saw no merit in the discussion because, after the discussion, then what? What has been gained, that one group has one set of opinions versus another group?

You suggest that I'm not acknowledging any link, which is not the case, but you aren't acknowledging that women kill far greater numbers of their infants and children as men, and I suspect the ratios are as great or greater than the number of men committing homicide against their partners. I certainly won't say that a link doesn't exist, I just don't think that it's significant for the reasons that I stated. What can you say about the women who constantly kill their babies? As I mention in another post, should it be that women are less lovely or until to be mothers? Of course not, but then most men don't kill their partners in cases of breakups either.

Obviously, if we look outside the U.S. we can find many differences in behavior and violence, but I thought we were talking about the U.S.

For me, it's not about giving the man a pass any more than the women who kill children in great numbers and leave broken and hurt families, should have a pass. As I suggested, I would favor looking beyond numbers to understand the reasons in the case of partner homicide or the killing of children by mothers.

 

Is it??!! Where did you get that from?

According to what I found - there is only two crimes that women commit _just as frequently as men_ - shoplifting and killing their own children.

 

I find that number interesting in view of the regular news reports of women killing their children. I would have to do some research before I agreed that this was an accurate view, but I appreciate the information.

It may be true that most violent crimes are committed by men as well as murders. For that reason alone I think that the numbers are important, but must be accompanied by an understanding of the reasons behind the violence.