what is your story about dating outside ur race

what was the expereince .. for example was there alot of push back from family and friends. what other variables did you consider before coloring outside the box ?

what was the first date like ? how did you feel?

what was it like to bring the home ( sort of coming out the closet huh) ?

 

Well I've always dated humans so I can definitively be called a monoracial dater. As far as the pigment differences in the skin of my dates, well that has been varied since I was a teenager.

I have never considered consequences of dating someone with more or less pigment than myself as it was not a variable I thought about, nor a radical thing to do. It was and is simply a normal thing to do.... Guess I grew up lucky because it was never an issue.

Take home message: WW dating BM is not an "experience" it's simply two individuals dating. It's not like I have 3 boobs which is exclusive to WW, we are all just people for jimmy's crickets!

 

:smt081 :smt081 :smt081 :smt081

100% agree on everything Athena said here.

 

I have yet to date outside my "race." Curious about it...

 

I seriously dislike the useage of "race" than in the context of the "human race".
I think it it needs to be retired and replaced.

But with what?
pigment?

like in "I am in an inter pigmented relationship"

:smt030

 

Me too. Which is why I rarely, if ever, use the term. We're all humans. We should be in this together, not separating ourselves by how much or how little pigment we have between us.

 

So many males on this board have never even dated a white woman before. I find it funny. How do you ladies deal with all this objectification?

 

I think its creepy.
I dont wanna date someone that wanna date me just because my skincolor and no other reasons. Were not unicorns.

 

You know, what I cannot change I have to accept or to ignore..

All that different race discussion is hard for me to understand, some posts shock me, because of the thought behind..Me, personally, I was never interested in race, religion or nationality, but I am interested in behaviour, education, manners and successful and self-confident people. I am travelling around the world since more than twenty years..you cannot do that,if you mostly see the differences as an adventure or problem.

 

My family and friends only care that he has a pulse. I didn't consider anything except for, "do I like him?" and "can we both deal with a long distance relationship in the beginning?". His colour and nationality had absolutely nothing to do with it.

Didn't really have a first "date". I don't think I've ever been on an actual "date" in my entire life. LOL I use to think that was some strange thing that americans did. I know...that sounds bizzare, right?

Anyway, my first experiences with him were magical, but not something I could really explain in words. I imagine it would have been no different than with a white man.

Honestly, like I said earlier, my family couldn't give two hoots that he's african. So I didn't "come out" to anyone about anything.

A person's just a person. I don't see the big deal really.

 

I don't see it as objectification Karma, everyone has to start somewhere. As someone who never realized there was anything unusual about two people of different races dating, it's hard for me to fathom how anyone could look at a person of another race and be concerned about approaching them solely because of their race. However clearly that is the case for some of the males here. If I worried about whether someone was going to object to speaking to me because of my skin color, I might be hesitant to approach them too.

This is WWBM, where are BM who like WW to go if they aren't welcome here? IMO this is the place to come if you are looking for like-minded people, to read other people's experiences, and they use what they learn to reassure themselves that IR exists, that there are WW who date/prefer BM, and that there is nothing wrong with that, no matter how many people in their personal lives may be telling them otherwise.

 

I am not surprised.

Possibly deep down inside some prefer to fantasise than actually embark the real thing. A few years ago, I made a comment that created a little controversy. It pertained to girls on this board praising a few male board members to point of making a thread dedicated to them in which, that person never capitalise on.

The majority of the girls who frequent here are on the hunt. Some leave because they realise many blokes are more content with flirting and not willing to make the next step. The ones who stay are either married or have a long-term relationship.

I have no idea what some of the blokes here are waiting on. They are too afraid meet a girl that doesn’t share the same complexion as them selves in the real world and, won’t make the effort in this forum.

Cheers!

 

That´s exactly, what I meant with being shocked of the thoughts behind posts- excuse me, but when I hear that melody- how can I find you attractive?
And to be honest stuff like that makes me feel to run away as fast as I can and that it is irresponsible, nearly a crime under those circumstances as you and others describe, to have a mixed child in the States..BTW, no insulting intended, just the thoughts you give me and I am really, really happy that the bm I know are different.

 

LOL. I like that one. LOL

 

I cosign with that because it is the human race. I like the fact in the bible it punished people for being against interracial relationships. read numbers 12 : 1-12

 

thats cool . in one culture from what i understand that family introduce the men to the woman and she gets to choose her husband. I believe the ultra orthodox jewish community does that. Im not too sure but i think i have that correct. it is not as simple as that but it is the fundamental

 

In the synague we talked about race this past sabbath . the older people talked about the mindset of the jews when they left egypt. some were scared of the new world they were going to. the rabbi said the same about during after the slavery how the black were being treated and they were afraid to speak up because of what mite happen.

i guess for a lot of black men it is the same way. I hate to tell you this secret but black men feel betrayed ( Not all BM ) by the BW ( not all BW. There are some wonderful BW out there) . the bw constantly stating where are the good bm but when they get em they treat us like trash. BM have the highest suicide rate in america among ALL demographics.

we want peace and love. I personally was treated like trash by my ex wife. ( please not I have always found women of all colors very wonderful) But to step outside the color line can be scary because of the possible backlash. In my mind I want a woman to love me like I love them. the problem in dating PERIOD is the game then add on the color barrier when its there or not is hard. like the elephant and the string effect.

we would like a little hint that we can get the green lite. maybe one day that we will not have the hesitation and we can approach with confidence.

 

Seriously,
You completely missread my comment.
That is not what I was talking about.

If someone wanted to date you just for skin color and nothing else - like nothing about your personality or anything else matter... as long as your white. That is creepy.

That is a completely different thing than to be attracted to a skincolor or eye color etc. but with a normal interrest that encompasses other things than just mere skincolor, like personality etc.

There are ww that do the same to bm too. (or wm for that matter).. wouldnt you think its a bit weird if a ww objectified you and just wanted to be with you just for your skincolor and nothing else?
Im sure you do her but I bet you would think that was a bit weird.


I am attracted to bm, but I dont objectify them and I dont want a bm to objectify me - heck I dont want to be objectified by anyone.

Karmas comment that I responded to was about just that, OBJECTIFICATION, not normal attraction.

 

Please don't feed the troll.

 

ooopppsss