What exactly is "IT"??

Sin, as I explained my own thoughts, I don't believe that the "it" factor has any validity, period. The point of my comments, to which you responded, were to explain possible distinctions between the culture here in the states, versus what might exist in OZ.

Race is such a complex issue here, and mostly as it relates to the relationship between White and Black Americans. As a function of that relationship, I'd say that many White Americans within the broader society would understand the signals such women were sending out to Black men. It's really something born out of the generations of dealing with one another, even though most of that association has not be as equals.

Don't forget, or more correctly, I should say that there have been both written and unwritten laws prescribing the "expected" behavior and conduct of the respective races toward one another, whether in social or professional settings.

In addition to the most overt aspects of historical separation found in miscegenation laws, mores and other laws have had a powerful effect as well. White and Black Americans, historically, weren't permitted to use the same toilet facilities, drink from the same water fountains, eat together publicly, dance together, talk together socially. Specifically, any attempt at social contact was unacceptable. So, it's not surprising that much of those same attitudes exist today, and that the majority of White Americans would recognize those cues. It would probably be something that other races or ethnicities might not understand as broadly.

 

Totally agree. Nothing I said disagreed with that. Just trying to stick to the original question/topic. I know race is a complex issue (and am aware of past segregation), I think this particular issue is (a lot) more superficial though.

 

Wow.... W T F?
I see none of us are talking about the same thing. :smt043
So that is my cue to give it up. V,,

 

LOL! I was thinking the same thing. We all seem to have a completely different idea about this topic. None of us are reading the same text.

 

I simply disagree that you can tell just by looking at someone ANYTHING about them. Especially who they will or will not date. You can't event tell this by the music they listen too. And the suggestion that you can is a bit silly.

 

I think *we* don't always know who we'd date ahead of time. Sometimes you meet a man or a woman who isn't at all "your type" and yet sparks fly anyway. Chemistry is a magical, quixotic and unpredictable thing. I have never been attracted to red headed or blonde men, yet I have had LTR with one of each. I wouldn't have turned my head to look at them on the street because they are not my type, but in getting to know them it turned out what was between their ears mattered a whole lot more than what was on their head.

 

I haven't read any of the replies, so excuse me I'm repeating something.

In my opinion, there is definitely an unsaid "IT" thing going on. There's a vibe we give off that shows BM we're interested.

I had my mother tell me that she notices BM checking me out.

I also noticed when BM stop approaching me as well. I noticed this when I cut my hair and lost weight (not talking about the stereotype of BM liking fat WW either, I still had my curves, but not as curvy).

I think when I was younger, I was a Hip Hop head, so that made it really easy to identify me, but since I'm older, I think it's the way I carry myself or something. I can't explain it, but it's definitely identifiable to BM.

 

that's what happens when u major in psychology

 

I'm glad I'm not alone in this

During the summer, a friend and I would sit on her doorstep in Washington, DC. We were near the Gallaudet campus, so most of the people in the neighbourhood are used to seeing people talk in sign language/ knew we were deaf. I'm engaged to aBM, she's dating a WM.

One day, we started to notice, the BM would wave at me and completely ignore my friend. Then, when more WM started to walk by, they waved at my friend and ignored me. It's not likely an attraction thing, more of a friendly, neighborly wave/hello.
We found it interesting though, because whatever the intentions were behind the wave, it'd always be BM waving at me, and WM waving at my friend.

After I went home to Newfoundland, Canada for the summer (very few black people on the island...), there weren't many BM to wave at me or anything like that and I wasn't hoping that they would. Yet, the WM still ignored me.
Before I was dating my fiance, I was with a WM, and I'd get attention by other white men as well. But now that I'm with my fiance, it's like I don't exist to WM I so can't explain what goes on with it at all, but I've been noticing it too.


Maybe we're looking at the BM more than WM? I don't know if it's true for all, but I can't look at a WM and feel attraction anymore... only BM. Maybe unknown to us, we're checking them out a little more than realized, but they see this?

Or, maybe we're just more willing to look at BM, wave and smile back compared to a WW that says she's not interested in BM? (Being in the US for so long makes me think of this, as some still hold rather racist tendencies.) Some WW might feel uncomfortable around BM, and show that in the body language when a man is near, while us WW that love BM don't feel that discomfort?

That's just my two cents

 

"IT" refers to a pheromone that black men induce. The gland is located at the head of the penis. It makes women of all races unresistant to the urge to blow a black man. LOL.