Unique Situation

If you're having fun, when it's obvious to everyone that your family will be uncomfortable with it... yeah I think that's quite jerky and inconsiderate. If she didn't have children, it would be fine with me...

(Come on, do you really think it would be all great if your dad found a girl your age, started dressing sexy/young/whatever, and got an obvious midlife crisis? And wouldn't you feel even more uncomfortable if your friends commented on it?)

Just dressing sexy in front of your children... sorry... doesn't sound right to me. It doesn't matter how old or young they are. She can dress sexy when he's moved out, or he's not around for other reasons. As long as he lives there (I asume he is), she should tone it down...

 

The funny thing in these situations, if anyone has noticed, guys always feel so uncomfortable when their mom is dating a younger guy, while if it's their dad dating a younger woman, it bothers them less...

Same thing for girls, if their dad starts dating a much younger girl, they seem to be more uncomfortable than when it is their mom dating a younger guy??

Is there some kind of insecurity due to the "competition" brought with the partner of the parent which is of the same sex as the kid?? some kind of Oedipus complex resurgence when we are confronted with our parents sexuality???

Ok, sorry, that's what happens when u are raised by a psychologist...

I think that it is absolutely normal to date whoever you want regardless of the age...CONVENTIONS, conventions, conventions...they are just KILLING us!

My dad is 73, got married 4 times, and is now married to a 36 year old woman...much younger than the eldest of my sisters who is 45, and only six years older than me...and he has never been happier...and I am so happy for him! Some uptight ppl have found it inappropriate, I told them to go get a life!!!

ps: Joliemarie, the $100.000 question is: what in the world were you doing looking at SMS in your dad's cell phone???!!

 

JREMINATOR, you may be right...it may be some kind of Oedipus-ish complex that I'm not aware of... :shock: She stayed with him last night, so I had the place to myself!

 

...

 

jolie...you are going to need that money to send me all of the gift certificates and cookies you plan on sending my way...let me get you my address...

 

Hey SouthGAguy....it is totally understandable that you're uncomfortable about this. Your Mom is doing the right thing about moving on with her life and having another relationship. Some white women deep down always had an attraction to black men, but circumstances in her life before now prevented her from doing so. Now, she is probably getting what she always wanted and props to her for being so hot she gets a young black man to be hers man. I'm not into dating older women, but they're are some hot older white women who've turned my head more than once!

 

Hey South...I don't mean to ride the fence here, but I think I would feel uncomfortable but also can relate to the guy. I am 26 and would LOVE it if an older sexy white woman / friend's mom had a thing for me. And I agree with natedogg...she may have had this all along and is finally getting to act on it. How is she acting tonight after staying with him?

 

Hey. She is in a great mood. And I'm glad for her. She said that she has some big plans to celebrate his birthday this weekend.

 

No doubt her black stud is giving her the sexual gratification she's wanted for a long time. I'm sure she is enjoying the relationship for other reasons, but to see the change in her no doubt has a lot to do with her getting some good sex from him.

 

I agree with nate. South, you gotta show me a picture of this woman lol

 

I think... if your mom is happy and you want her to be happy just be happy.

Age shouldn't matter at all.... if you love being with a certain person as long as they treat you (your Mom) with respect thats all the should matter

 

Thank you very much, iluvu. She does seem really happy...I am just sick to death of hearing my dad bitch about it / her. I told him the other day that I was going to quit coming over if he kept up his stupid little comments. :?

 

Can understand...

Hey, I'm 51, white female and divorced. Just a few weeks ago I got asked out by an 40-year-old black man who works with my 19 year old daughter. She actually set me up with him.
It took a couple of tries on her part before I agreed. I can tell you, no matter how pretty or HOT a woman is in the eyes of others, when she has gone through a divorce, that is a form of abandonment. She may feel that something was wrong with her or that she lost her appeal somehow.
For your mom to be pursued by a guy much younger, handsome and black... well, it probably made her feel closer to 25 than her real age.
I know that having a younger, muscular and charming black man show interest in me was a big boost to my ego. And honey, I needed that.
You go, mom! Just keep your eyes open, son, and if you see signs that this young man is not looking out for the best interest of your mom, well, you aren't too young to have a "heart-to-heart" with him.

 

Well, SouthGAguy, I'm not surprised your dad is having a tough time with this one. Men are competitive by nature and even though he is no longer with your Mom, it hurts his ego to see her with a younger, black man who by the change in mood and attitude lets your Dad know that her new man is pleasing her in a way he never did. He certainly didn't expect her to move on so quickly. He is jealous of her and will stay that way until he can find a way to truly move on.

 

mature white women, expecially with children, date black younger guys a lot more then you think.
they are in some strange way more easy to aproach for eachother..

 

Hey. Long time lurker here. I decided to finally join...nice to meet you all

South, I don't know your mom but I am a 40 year old woman from GA and I can't tell you how much I both relate to her and champion her for her decision. I have been divorced now about two years from a very conservative jerk of a husband. I have my grass cut (and general lawn care done) by a black genteleman in his late 20s (I think) whose family runs a very good, reliable lawn care business. He has been doing my yard for about a year now and, let me tell you, the man is gorgeous. I don't think I have encountered a finer specimen of black man...lol (I'm sure there are plenty out there) He flirts with me and has done so more lately than ever (talk about a movie-like plot haha). Of course, I am not sure if he would ever be interested in me as far as relationships and all go. But he recently made my day. I was having a really terrible day and he talked to me and told me he thought I was the most young-looking and beautiful 40 year old he had ever known (I have been told I'm very young-looking quite a bit - not to boast haha) I'm sure my situation doesn't help, South, but let go and let your mom have her fun. She is a lucky woman! I would want to be happy and would want my son to want the same thing for me.

Again, it's nice to meet you all. I enjoy all y'all's posts (especially lipstick - my hero haha)

 

I just wanted to give props to South.

It's clear in his posts that he loves his mother and has looked at this situation from multiple angles and is well adjusted in his reasoning. As males we're always keen on who's with our mother and how he's treating here.

Me and my cousins kind of flipped when our mothers "rediscovered" going out and having fun since many were "not on the market" really when we were young but once we all were 18 or more things changed. There were bumps and bruises a long the way for my mother and aunt but watching yoru mother date as an adult is much easier than watching her struggle in a relationship as a small boy knowing there was nothing you can do.

 

Again, it's nice to meet you all. I enjoy all y'all's posts (especially lipstick - my hero haha)[/quote]

hi miss blondie :smt006

i didn't know i had a fan club...i just say it like it is...more times than not from personal experience...always happy to make a new friend...welcome to the board...we have a really fun group of women here...as well as our family of bm...

 

:shock:

My cousin married a white women with three kids from her previous marriage. The kids loved him to death like he was their genetic father. She has two more by him and they are the most beautiful family I have seen.

Now that I think about it. I sure do have alot of white cousins and aunts in my family.

Anyway.

I can understand how you feel. He younger, not your biological father, and he is black. Normally you would have to deal with him not being your father but you have him being young and black.

But I am glad you are happy that she is happy. That is where it counts. As for your friends, what kind of friends talk about your mother? I my book anyone that talks about my mother either get one of the two. 1. 5 knuckle sandwhich Fred Sandford style or 2. A knuckle sandwhich Mr.T Style sucka! (Don't ask)

Maybe you can dating black women and follow suit, get some of these women off of our backs while we are dating white women! LOL J/K That's why I put this in small because I am being crazy.

 

Thank you very much. I have looked at it from many angles. I've just decided that I'm happy to see her with so much life and I'm ok with her feeling sexy. She has been spending more and more time with him lately and it seems to be doing her alot of good. It was a bit odd to see her sitting on his lap, I will admit...but I'm glad for her and him. I agree that seeing your mom happy (even if it's with someone really close to your age) is much better than seeing her with (I will admit) a "dud".