Then and now.....

How have you changed?

Then ... When you were in your early twenties your views on __________ were ___________ and now they are______________.

 

Maybe you should start out this thread with filling in the blanks yourself. That might get the conversation going a little better.

 

Yeah I think you should start G. I don't want to start off inappropriately.

 

Ok I'll start, I know i'm in my early twenties but I have changed a lot since my young teens.

When I was in my young teens I had terrible problems with trusting people especially men. Thinking they were all out to attack me and all that stuff. I lived in a total fantasy world were nothing mattered outside my house. I ate terribly and I hated school (bullying and homesick).

As I got older certain things got worse like trusting people whether they were men or women. My fantasies became more intense and took over my life and my look on the real world. I had a hatred for most people and only cared about animals. I had based to much of my human views on serial killers, wife beaters and murderers. I lost contact with most my family and only had my nan (grandma) that made me distrust people even more (woman). My whole life was surronded by my crushes that i had on certain celebrities.

Fast forward to now and I have changed so much. I no longer have a bad view on humans as a whole just the ones that are horrible. I love animals just as much as I did before but realize now that humans matter just as much. I still have my crushes but they no longer take over my life. I come back in contact with certain family members, still along way to go with them. My eating is 90 percent healthy and I am working on becoming more confident. I am still working on my trust issuies especially with men, I am quite submissive around them.

I have a long life ahead of me, I hope. I can't wait to see where I will be when I reach my thirties or who i will be. I hope to get married and have kids. Something I never would have thought I'd do when I was younger but things change.

 

I'm sorry to hear what you went thru... I'm also happy to see you aren't letting your past hold you back.

 

Damn chick that's some rough stuff! Kids can be such cruel little turds huh!? My nickname was carrot top and freckle fart from kmart. LOL. At the time i was ready to bring out the nun chucks, but can easily laugh at it now though.

It's good to hear that you've changed your view on people. Trust is a huge thing and a huge struggle for a lot of people, myself included. But I think it's a case by case evaluation. Sometimes you just have to give people the benefit of the doubt until they give you a reason not to.

Im sure you'd agree that it helped to have a creative outlet through the hard times. There's nothing wrong with living in a fantasy world. Sure does beat the bs surrounding us on a daily basis!

Onwards and upwards chick!! You'll get there and fulfill your dreams with your dream man x

 

Thank you both, it's been hard and still will be but life is too short to waste it in dwelling in the past. The future is full of possibilities. You will always come in contact with bullies whether they are children or adults, that's life.

 

Amen girlfriend. Optimism is the only healthy outlook. A lot can change when you change your perspective around for sure.

 

Several things have changed between my early 20s (then) and late 20s (now).


I used to not think much about my health and how my life style choices were affecting it.
This is something I do a lot more now.


While in past I was really an extreme case of homebody kind of person,I definitely enjoy getting out and seeing different cities or even countries now.
I'd like to visit at least one country in each continent eventually.
So far I have America and Europe covered and if you allow to count Istanbul,Turkey as Asia (the city is split between Europe and Asia and I visited both sides), then I have Asia covered,too.

In my early 20s my criteria in a potential mate were very different to now.
I was seeing things more "black and white", not as much "grey zone",but came to realize that I may have prioritized the wrong things or been too strict with others. This also includes no more being exclusively into black males.
If a man has a great personality,we get along great and i find him handsome, it would be a shame to kick him to the curb based on something like "ethnicity or race".


In the past I was really not much of a brave person and would make excuses a lot. Now I am more willing to be brave and at least give something my best shot. Sometimes even literally. If someone had told me 10 years ago that I would work armed security with a gun on my hip,I would have told them they must mistake me for someone else or be joking.