The Ugly Duckling Syndrome!

Here is how I see it. If you not like what I said, you can simply pay me no mind. But, I know the Female mind does not work in that way. They must shower any man with attention they see with contrary character that does not coincide with their 'ideal.'

Since I am the one who brought this topic to attention, all women and some men do not agree with said assertion. That is fine by me, but instead of discussing said assertion directly toward me -- since these said women find me irresistible, we now have subliminal messages indirectly directed toward me. Such behaviour get will get no respect, I will call out said behaviour and make clear that said behaviour is emotional and incoherent.

My goal as it have always been, for this topic, is for blackmen to be aware of women with this state of mind, and with this state of incumbent Ugly Duckling and Serial Daters. It is up to blackmen to deal with said behaviour accordingly. Surely, they are encouraged to question this state of mind.

My goal with this topic for whitewomen, is to question contrary characters, be it the WW who is curious about the "myths", OR the WW who has now graduated beyond the idiosyncrasies of the said "myths". Yet, in typical Female fashion, all I get is emotional, irrationality, shaming language indirectly directed toward me, which is what BOTH ghostgryl and Moshicivia displayed.

 

Oh, you make me laugh!!! My dear, I am not showering you with attention because you are a man. I respond to what you say because there is a bit of intelligence behind it. And since we all find you irresistible, why are you not our 'ideal?' Ahhhhh, not one attractive, intelligent white woman has recognized that a bm with character could be our ideal.

 

I am talking about the attention indirectly displayed. You do not like said assertion, in discord, your attention is directly displayed, you appreciate my "fowardness" and not intimidated by it. You do not need to shower me attention with subliminal messages do you? There are a few other women here who do the opposite because well.........they can not handle a man of contrary character of their 'ideal.' Can I say most women like their men ignorant?

 

LOL

 

There is some ugly and brutal truth in this statement...Only if you qualify it with MOST.


Walking to the library one day I saw a very cute and very jovial ww(girl) playing around with a mixed 2 year old(my estimate) child.
My instinctive feeling was that she had adopted the child.

Then I saw her cross the street as she joined two BM who were waiting for her.
It seemed to me that the child is hers and one of them is her man. :!:

What impressed me most was the way she carried herself:Very happy with her mixed child,very happy with her man and she is young and very cute .
She was so oblivious of the stares from other pedestrians.
And this was in Africa!!!

Indeed there are cute and beautiful WW who will love a BM unconditionally..... I believe so anyway. :roll: :roll:


May I digress:
(In passing,someone asked on these forums if there are IRs in Africa.I did answer to that query and said yes.But in all honesty I find that type of ignorance very pathetic )

 

Personally, I do not believe any of us exercise true free will. If the our existence as humans and "races" are relative, conditioned and interdependent, how can "will" alone be free? Will, like any other thought, is conditioned. So-called ‘freedom itself is conditioned and relative. There can be nothing absolutely free, physical or mental, as everything is interdependent and relative. Yes, even those who are analytical are conditioned to do so, it is just an higher preset of thought. True, they may be exercising "choice", but they are still exercising a preset of rules which are conditioned. Which is what I said be stating:

We have a CHOICE to fall pray under this preset of thought. MOST BM and WW never exercise that CHOICE, which is why we have what is said above. How many blackmen or whitewomen do not fall under this preset condition? If the majority of blackmen and whitewomen are falling under this preset condition how are said naysayers being "over analytical?" BM/WW relationships are conditioned to fail because we continue to never exercise whatever 'free will' we do have. Most BM/WW relationships are effects of natural selection, which is again conditioned.

 

And there is the truth once again.

 

Freedom may be conditioned and relative to our surroundings, teachings, and inherited characteristics, but without those conditionings, there really wouldn't be any free-will at all. Can you imagine what life would be like if we were ordained to be puppets on strings for the higher forces of the universe at all times? Where's the free-will in that?

So, along with either being analytical or not and making choices, (which is an example of free-will) you would have to believe that even with our limits in human capacity, we are still either allowed to have free-will, or we just do have free-will, even if and when we think, feel, and act in ways that we ourselves don't like, or others. Like I said before, allowing and accepting the rules and choices of others is act of free-will, so either way you look at it, whether or not we mean to think for ourselves or others, it's all a part of free-will. Human capacity may be limited, but free-will surely is not.

Naysayers are the reason why many black men and white women fall under those conditions you stated, which was what I was explaining to sunstorm, HOWEVER, they don't apply to all black male/white female relationships. Certainly not yours, right? I'm sure the majority of men and women in here would say the same thing, except for the lurkers (registered or unregistered) and those 'darling' trolls who try to enforce those preset conditions all over the boards.

And, natural selection doesn't apply to any sort of demographic. Natural selection only applies to individual preference, and if that wasn't true, then the world be either overpopulated, or destroyed by now.

 

You're quite the realist aren't you? :wink: Don't ever change that.

 

UH HUH.
I won't change.....if you say so :wink:

 

Ok, so you believe Free Will and Choice are interdependent? I will arise the same question as I posed before. How can a Will, or anything for that matter, arise without conditions, when the whole law of existence is conditioned and relative, and is within the law of cause? To go further with said question; can we say the idea of free will is connected to the ideas of Gods, Soul, Justices, Rewards and Punishments? If this is true in all assessment, not only is so called Free Will not free, but even the very idea of Free Will is not free from conditions. So how are we really exercising a Will independent of conditions?

I get what you are saying though: 7Seven we are exercising Free Will because of Choice; but, even Choice is conditioned. For instance, one may exercise his Choice to be with only White women, but what conditions brought about said Choice? Well, there are many conditions/causes which would bring about said Choice: whilst Attraction, Preference and alike are all conditions/causes for the desired effect/choice. Even Naysayers are just another condition/cause that give BM/WW relationships an negative allure. Here is the worst part, if you look a bit deeper, there are Black men and White women here who are in relationships who actually reinforce these conditions. I could name a few, but I will getting "out of pocket."

 

I am the ugly duckling, a black man who isnt cool or hip like most brothas, not bald or wearing an earring or tatoo, not dressed like a disco duck, just a nice regular guy who happens to be black--the original Ugly Duckling<<<< :cry:

 

sigh..
hey bro
manly *hug*



i feel the same about the nice regular guy part, but iz a Indian here..
haha...

 

OK...........
Sardonic, you are right. Everyone has the right to free speech no matter how superficial it is, I'M SORRY TO ALL FOR MY EMOTIONAL RESPONSE..
I guess I do take offense easily, since I have never had to deal with such mind play. Maybe I have grown up for the last 38 years in a sheltered environment that doesn't deal with these issues at hand, so again I do apologize! Any relationship I have been in (short or long term) I do not recall any of our issues being about IR issues. They were about religion, money, and other petty arguments. All these could crop up in any relationship....About IR's being deeper, what I meant was, is that usually people try to take what we have and turn it into a issue....I unfortunately have a problem with that since I see all people as equals: short/tall, attractive/unattractive, underweight/overweight, color/no color. There is already to much UGLINESS in the world. I just do not like adding to it.....
I cannot claim to be highly intelligent, only life experiences drive me, so I usually do not fair well in some of the discussions here. But what I can tell you is this...I do accept people for their M.O's, I just like to have an opinion too! All of us do not think as 7seven does, nor do we all think as I do, so AGAIN, I APOLOGIZE!!! I guess for me it is like the KKK coming to town to speak, and I have to listen to the message yet I'm not feelin' or belivin' the message....So I either make noise or ignore.....
CARRY ON......

 

Obviously, their posts affect you on some level, otherwise, you wouldn't waste time responding to these posts in the manner that you do. If you were really 100% logical, then you would've answered their posts using 100% logic without needing to resort to attacking the person making the "emotional" argument. That is referred to as an ad hominem argument. Because you failed to do that, then it can be inferred that you are dodging the issue that they put forth.

 

Welcome Uppitynegro.

Very insightful there bro.


Of late,even one of his disciples has started to question these attacks.

 

moskvichka:

I so do love the quote you put out, I forgot to acknowledge it earlier!!
Especially the last part..... :twisted:

"I also can't stand it when people pollute the space around them, be it with food left overs, feces, uncensored language or ideological diarrhea... Just stupid and disgusting... as if a pack of cooking yeast was thrown into a pile of shit."
:wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:

 

In order for ad hominem to take place, first, I must be dodging an issue. What issue is being dodged exactly? What issue did they pose? In what manner did I "respond" whilst creating the desired effect of said statement?

 

Yes, in fact, without free-will, there are no choices.

Without any arising conditions and relativity, free-will isn't really free, especially when you take into account the lack of reasoning behind existence without any conditioning and relativity. Physics teaches us that anything and everything is relative to our own existence in our own personal surroundings and upbringing, no matter where we are in the universe, and if not, then how can mankind survive? With a lack of conditioning, what is there for us to do, think, feel, and how exactly do we act freely, if not accordingly, to who we truly are among one another in the world?

Honestly, no free-will can be independent of conditions because a part of being alive and human is being subjected to conditions, which stems from free-will, and with free-will being the greatest gift and curse to mankind because of it's natural manifestation, you either have to take it or leave it, so to speak. It's either conditions, or unconsciousness.

The idea of free-will may be related to the ideas of said Gods, Soul, Justices, Rewards, and Punishment, but those things are inborn elements of the manifestation of free-will.

Yes, as I have mentioned before, there are those who will reinforce these conditions of black male/white female relationships no matter what, just like those lurkers and trolls I brought up earlier, but either way you slice it, there will be so-called 'good apples' and 'bad apples' in pretty much any and every bunch of any sort of group of people that you or anyone else would ever belong to. There will always be people who act out stereotypes for the rest of us of any ethnicity, there will always be people who will donate to charities, even if they are or aren't crooked, there will always be people who will have way too many children in their household, etc., the point is, it goes on and on, and the many different types of people that will exist throughout the world until the end of time is UNLIMITED. You can't put a quantity on the personalities of human beings no matter how good or bad their deeds are, and why you ask?

Because of FREE-WILL.

 

Most of the posters in here are on your side with these issues. We just like to express our views a lot differently, that's all.