"The Rules" for black men... | Page 2

SardonicGenie · Oct 3, 2005

Bryant said:

jaydun25 said:

I will tell you this, you pretty much laid it down. I have been doing that for years, and what trips me out, is that many women won't stop until you pay them some sort of attention. I have had women flirt so hard that they were practically playing themselves in the process. Then, when you finally step to them--after they have been flirting with you like crazy, and their interest is blatantly obvious--they want to give you the cold shoulder, as if you were sweating them, when it was them sweating you. I notice that most of this behavior comes from women of color too. It comes from the fact that many of them are secretly attracted to black guys, and hate the fact that they are, and amongst many of them, it is seen as not a cool thing to do. So they try to firt and stuff when they have no intention of taking it to the next level. I am beginning to find women of color a waste of time. Even if they show any sort of interest, I don't even pay them attention at all anymore.

They are hoping that YOU do something that will convince them to take th e risk. I ain't gonna do nothing, because I know the game. I just get tired of the way many women act. They automatically think, if they are attractive, assume that if they show a black man a little bit of attention, he is going to come running. And if you don't they lose self-esteem big time, when they know that they really like you. Nah, not this black man. Not out of fear either, because you know that many of them have no intentions but to feed their egos.

If they see a handsome, well-dressed black guy, they almost get angry about it.; esepcially sisters. Black men that are decent -looking get treated worse than anyone in this country. People can look at a black man and tell when he has confidence, and many women don't like that. They don't like being attracted. So they start trying to put up resistance when you haven't said a word or suggested anything to them at all. I haven't ever seen other men get treated like we do, just for trying to keep themselves up and walk with pride. I have NEVER seen it.

I am not going to lie man, I see brothers with different women out here alot. However, you better believe that it was a hit and miss game with them. Some brothers don't care how many times they get rejected. Honestly, rejection doesn't bother me either anymore. It is just part of the game. However, what insults me is women who you aren't remotely attracted to, acting as if you are going to step to them. Women who have never been approached by black men in their lives. Their fear is irrational. Sometimes, you have to wonder if it is even fear, or more like repressed attraction. Most of the time, when people tend to overdo something, they probably feel the exact opposite of the way that they are acting. However, I don't care either way really. That is their trip, not mine. Admittedly, I used to get extremely bothered by the actions of some of these women, because I didn't understand what I did to convey to them a message that would cause them to act like that. Not anymore, because I realize that their actions make no sense, and I just ignore them like you said..

With some of these women, I could understand if they had brothers stepping to them left and right. But, much of the time, many of these women are totally ignored by the average black man. I could look at a woman and tell on the spot, which ones black men are attracted to. And the funny thing about it is, the ones that are fine, aren't the ones that are tripping around black guys. It is the ones that aren't. They aren't even the type that black men would look at twice. Many may be just genuinely unattracted, but why go to extremes about it? If you aren't attracted, then just keep it moving. That is the way that they act with men of any other race. However, they have to go the extra mile when it is a brother, even when he hasn't looked her way. I find this behaviour to be extremely apparent with many Asian women as well. You haven't even looked at them, and they are already tripping.

Many decent-looking black women do this alot as well, but for them it is a little more understandable. They probably have been hounded a little by brothers. But Asian women? HAHHAAHAHHHAHAH!!! Maybe some of the Philipino chicks, but the others. I don't even look at them twice.

I find many them to be bland and unattractive. You are looking more at their behaviour and the way that they act than you are at them; because you wonder why are they acting out of character. If you so much as stare at them, they trip out. If you so much as glance at them, they are totally extreme with it.

Women of color do this stuff big time for some reason. However, these same women of color make themselves too easy for a white guy. There is nothing prideful about these women. In fact, many of them have low self-esteem; including black women.

Like I was saying a long time ago, it isn't the thugs and the criminals who suffer, it is the decent black men that people try to hurt, to people you are starting to step out of your place. However, I can count on my hand the bad interaction I have had with the males of any race--except Hispanics. Even Asian men are okay. But their women are something else. It is the females that will give you problems outwardly. Alot of people may be racist, and even hate blacks, but the women tend to try to go the extra mile as far as it is concerned. However, the hatred isn't displayed to the black men that people KNOW don't have anything to lose--I.E.--thugs-- it is to the ones that look as if they have a future.

Nobody likes seeing a black man who has it together....Nobody, not even black women, no matter how much they protest to the contrary.

Anyway, everything you said is what ALL black men need to do, because it makes common sense to do so; especially black men who think anything of themselves.

I can't add anything from, nor take anything away from what you said. The only thing I can say is that it can sometimes cause you to miss out on women who are genuinely interested, because you can never tell their intnetions. I have had so many women flirt with me, that I don't even pay them attention anymore, because the minute you step to them, they act as if you are getting on their nerves. Many women can't decide if they like black men or not.

Later,
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Really enjoyed your post Jaydun. I liked the part when you mentioned how really good looking girls expect you to drool all over them. That's so funny because i usually look for a moment, and then keep going. For some reason i think their beauty (if there is such a thing) just isn't enough to stop me dead in my tracks. Beauty along with a smile....that's great, but just beauty alone, nah, that won't be enough to get me to stop and appraoch her. Another good point that you made was how it's usually the most unattractive girls that have the worst attitudes towards black guys, and i totally agree. Some of the prettiest white girls that i've ever seen are usually the one's who warm up to black guys the quickest. The pretty white girls, as strange as it may sound, from my experience with them, are usually the one's who are more comfortable being around black guys. Kinda weird huh???
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Strange... as it seems...

my experiences with this have been the same. :? Small world.

SardonicGenie · Oct 3, 2005

flaminghetero said:

sunstorm said:

Hows about a few rules that might help the prospects of bm in the dating market? Not as individuals, but stuff that bm might do that improves our situation on the whole...

1. Pay no attention to women you aren't genuinely interested in. If you don't think you'll really approach her, pay her no mind.

The reason we have overweight bw women walking around in "ass out" outfits is because they know they can get attention that way. They don't want you, they want the attention. Ugly ass, ugly attitude on the march. Give them the attention and you encourage that nonsense.

The reason we have butt-ugly asian, indian, and Latin women "rejecting" us whether we want anything from them or not, is the perception that all black men want them and we're a dime a dozen. It's no exaggeration to say that Indian women, Latin women, and Asian women think EVERY black man wants them. Counter that perception by paying no attention to any one you have no plans to approach.

Also -- keep in mind that some of them will come on to you, just because they think they can get an easy rise out of black men. They just want to feel attractive. But YOU should be the one that calls the shots -- so if you wouldn't be interested in her otherwise, ignore her.

A lot of these women are status-worshippers anyway, natural snobs coming out of cultures of rigid social stratification and status-worship. Understand that nothing moves a snob like snobbery, so if you really want them to value you, snub them. Believe me it works. There's a chick at my gym that's all but going crazy because I won't even look in her direction. Nothing moves a natural snob like snobbery. Believe it.

It's one of those little truths about people, like: "women respond well to genuine flattery" & "women are attracted to confidence" & "bullies are cowards". Nothing makes a snob more attracted to you than you snubbing them first. Understand that.

I hope you guys wouldn't want those kind of women anyway; (I sure as hell don't), but understand the point...

---

So -- anyone else care to keep this thread going with more rules that might improve the status of black men in the dating market? (Not in relationships -- what you do there is your own business -- but in basic dating -- first date or prior...)
Click to expand...

Not long ago BM knew all these things..

Brothers used to know how to carry themselves
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There was genuine unity back then in the segregation days...

but, when things changed after Dr.King made an impact on race-relations in America, we lost a lot of our ways to carry ourselves...

but, this site is enough proof that some of us have our heads on straight.

flaminghetero · Oct 4, 2005

SardonicGenie said:

flaminghetero said:

sunstorm said:

Hows about a few rules that might help the prospects of bm in the dating market? Not as individuals, but stuff that bm might do that improves our situation on the whole...

1. Pay no attention to women you aren't genuinely interested in. If you don't think you'll really approach her, pay her no mind.

The reason we have overweight bw women walking around in "ass out" outfits is because they know they can get attention that way. They don't want you, they want the attention. Ugly ass, ugly attitude on the march. Give them the attention and you encourage that nonsense.

The reason we have butt-ugly asian, indian, and Latin women "rejecting" us whether we want anything from them or not, is the perception that all black men want them and we're a dime a dozen. It's no exaggeration to say that Indian women, Latin women, and Asian women think EVERY black man wants them. Counter that perception by paying no attention to any one you have no plans to approach.

Also -- keep in mind that some of them will come on to you, just because they think they can get an easy rise out of black men. They just want to feel attractive. But YOU should be the one that calls the shots -- so if you wouldn't be interested in her otherwise, ignore her.

A lot of these women are status-worshippers anyway, natural snobs coming out of cultures of rigid social stratification and status-worship. Understand that nothing moves a snob like snobbery, so if you really want them to value you, snub them. Believe me it works. There's a chick at my gym that's all but going crazy because I won't even look in her direction. Nothing moves a natural snob like snobbery. Believe it.

It's one of those little truths about people, like: "women respond well to genuine flattery" & "women are attracted to confidence" & "bullies are cowards". Nothing makes a snob more attracted to you than you snubbing them first. Understand that.

I hope you guys wouldn't want those kind of women anyway; (I sure as hell don't), but understand the point...

---

So -- anyone else care to keep this thread going with more rules that might improve the status of black men in the dating market? (Not in relationships -- what you do there is your own business -- but in basic dating -- first date or prior...)
Click to expand...

Not long ago BM knew all these things..

Brothers used to know how to carry themselves
Click to expand...

There was genuine unity back then in the segregation days...

but, when things changed after Dr.King made an impact on race-relations in America, we lost a lot of our ways to carry ourselves...

but, this site is enough proof that some of us have our heads on straight.
Click to expand...

I am encouraged by this thread..

lildidi25 · Jun 18, 2006

Wow I really enjoyed this enjoyed this forum. Thanks everyone for being so honest and refreshing. I hope I can meet some new guys from Canada on this site, in the meantime I will enjoy these forums.

(for some fun my mechanic say to me) I couldn't fix your breaks so I made your horn louder. Lighten up ppl
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