Some BM Still Intimidated by WW

What double standard Ches? Again I'll use the female rape analogy. It's like you having a discussion about rape without bringing men up. Is it possible?

 

Lol touche. My shit looks like someone wants to recruit for the damn bloods lol

 

Everything was fine until Lippy mentioned darkie and then......that didn't go down around 'little africa' too well

 

Light skin nuccas always playing that soft that shit lol

 

Red light special and shit

 

I'm hanging with Common now...fuck the bullshit

 

Never mind, TDK. We've had this discussion before. Too weary of it to even begin.

 

Dude u a fool lol

 

:smt038:smt038:smt038

 

Ches, I can understand your comment and see how you have come to that conclusion. I've been on this forum for many years (on and off) and actually been very involved at times, even though my current post count doesn't reflect that. I'm a woman who fits in the categories you mentioned. I think you may be selling yourself a bit short too, but I won't argue on those points. I'll just say that there is often much more than fitting into the limited categories that you mention that have created alliances in the forum. I don't know that my very old posts are accessible, if they were you would see that I have often asked all sorts of questions in the forum and people have openly discussed things. You may want to think that's because I "fit" into categories you listed. But I really think it had more to do with my approach and my genuine interest in understanding. I've watched women who are in the various categories you mentioned catch the wrath on here as well.

I certainly can understand the raised eyebrow when someone comes to the idea later in life that they are suddenly preferring bm or ww. No one wants to be a novelty/experiment/left over, etc. I also think that can be very short sided and rude to the person it's getting raised at. The idea that women come to black men because they can no longer get white men is ridiculous! There are also many white women who always preferred black men but may have ended up married to a white man (just as there are black men who have done similarly with black women). To this day, I am approached mostly by white men, even with a black child.

Whether you believe it or not, there is a difference when you have a black or mixed child. Some of us have both or white, black, mixed, etc children and really get to have a unique view. It's also different for a black man who's involved with a woman who has white children. The day to day reality of what we experience changes our views on things. A prime example of this was when I went off on some folks about the killing of Trayvon Martin.

I know what happened on the frat thread. I was involved in it. I see things very differently than you do. Maybe I've become much more jaded over the years. Except that most of my comments on that topic would have come long before having black children. I think the problem with that thread and where people took issue was that it seems like people are often quick to jump to the defense when it's a white kid and don't do the same when it's a black kid. I also think that it seems like there is a lack of willingness for many people to take a look at things differently. Like maybe before taking a stand, try the idea on from other povs and maybe you'll see things differently.

TDK - I completely understand your pov about women later in life coming to bm, and I won't deny that there aren't some who would fit what you have described. But things aren't always so cut and dry. If I didn't have my daughter, I'm sure I could be looked at that way from the outside looking in from those who don't know any better. It's easy to quickly pass judgment. However, most women who prefer black men at whatever point in life are not doing so as a last resort. People will often take the "easy way out" in life. While interracial relationships are en vogue in some areas for a fleeting moment, they certainly aren't the easy way to go.

Sometimes people's preferences change and there is nothing cynical about it.

 

Common sense is alive and well hell I feel like crying

 

See when I wrote that no one listened...but when kinca writes it, everyone pays attention

 

Hon you know damn well that you are responsible for why people don't take you seriously.

 

I agree and said that much to Ches. I get it life circumstances may not bring you around people you may be more attracted to. For all I know I may be incredibly attracted to Armenian women but would never know because there aren't any on this side of the country at least not anywhere close to me. So I get it. It's just the "new" preference that never existed is weird. It's one thing to be open but another to suddenly be all about that black dick.

 

I commented when you said it! Its 100% true! I think I even got neg repped for it lol.

 

She's white duuuuhhh

 

lol.

i agree with u in that statement u made.

im also going to put it in another angle.

so what they married intraracially and then interracially.

ive said it before and i will say it again.....

i dont date a ww because shes white i date HER cause shes right.

women are women at the end of the day.. who cares when u dated ir in your life.

 

Yep - I completely agree. I have the same raised eyebrow about women (and men) who have the new revelation. I'd like to think that most probably had some sort of interest early on in life and denied the interest (for whatever reason). But I've also had enough experience and I'm realistic enough to know that there are those who are doing the experimental/whatever thing.

 

I look at things this way....whatever someone did before I met them is what needed to happen for them to be where they are in this very moment. So, if I'm into them then I have to appreciate where they have been, all of it, the good bad and ugly.

While I certainly understand not wanting to be the "experiment" or "last resort", etc. I don't get the idea of being upset with a white women who's been with white men. I certainly take no issue with a black man who's been with black women. I don't have any issues with black women. I appreciate them!