Rejection

How or how well do you handle rejection when it comes to dating/flirting? Do you think men or women handle rejection better(in general)?

I personally tend to first take things in general(including rejection) a little personal but then begin to think about it and then usually deal well with it.
As far as genders I am not sure.Women are often more emotional and probably show it more when they feel rejected whereas men may not show it but it doesn't mean they can just always brush things off easily.
Just my 2 cents. Interested in reading more opinions

 

Depends who who is rejecting me and what they are rejecting me from

 

I was referring to dating.. Sorry for not clarifying.Will edit the Original Post to make it more clear

 

To be honest, I have yet to expereince rejection in dating. Probably because I don't flirt etc unless I am DAMN certain there is a mutual interest. I am not very agressive when it comes to dating.

 

rejections are like fuel for me...everyone can't say no all the time...
closed mouths don't get fed and you only live once!

 

Yeah, I don't make the first move so I haven't really been rejected.
There was one guy I liked a few years back that said he just liked me as a friend and I was pretty gutted about that and did take it personally. But then he asked me out not long later so I didn't have too much time to cry about it or anything.
I do take things personally though, probably too much so. I instantly start doubting myself and start thinking the whole 'I'm too ugly! Too fat! Too short!' crap but I do get over it.

As for genders, I think that men take rejection better. I'm not saying that they aren't upset by it but I think that generally men still make the first move so they need to confidence there and if they do get rejected, they need to move on pretty quickly so as to not let it effect their chances with another woman.

 

I think many people still think in a traditional way....aka man approaches woman... so maybe men just think they are expected to be the one to make the first move. I could be wrong though

 

Yeah, I think so. I got mad respect for women that do make the first move, but personally, I can't do it myself. I'll give hints, like I'll smile and make eyecontact at the guy and hope he gets the hint but I guess I'm a bit traditional in that sense, I couldn't just stroll over to him and be all 'yeah babyyy, let me buy you a drink!'

 

Same here.I give hints.If I'm really impressed may make a simple but honest compliment but be really blunt about my attraction towards him I can't do. Too shy.Lol

 

lippy thinks that every person at some point in their life will experience rejection in some way/shape or form...not every person that you dig is going to dig you and not every person that is into you will you welcome into your life...take it all in stride because right around the corner is yet another person to meet...

NEXT:smt045

 

You're absolutely right that generally speaking, we men, take rejection better because first of all, it happens so many times that we somewhat become used to it, and second, we have the sense to realize that being rejected by any female hasn't necessarily anything to do with us or isn't related to our physical appearance. Women are much more complex and the reason for rejection could be related to her mood, how much comfortable she felt, the timing of our approach or if we said anything completely stupid etc.

On the other hand, a girl being rejected would always make the correlation with the rejection and her physical appearance. Her being rejected by a guy she found attractive is tantamount to that guy founding her unattractive or not attractive enough to his taste, and that's crushing for all women. That's why I think in most cultures, we seldom see women making the first move. Most women are "programmed" not to make the first move and expect the guys to approach them and would enjoy a little courtship.

Yeah, sometimes men are offended by rejection, but it's more the ego that's bruised than those men starting to develop sense of insecurities of physical appearance. You never met a guy you rejected and you see him immediately trying to hit on your friends? It's because they don't really care they were rejected, they're just trying to pick up someone, any girl.

So is it the fear of rejection that prevent women from approaching guys? It could be. But I always wondered why all throughout sub-saharan Africa, African girls would jump on the sight of any European man and make the first move while they would ignore most African guys and would play hard to get when they are approached. And in Western Europe, I've seen the reverse scenario taking place when Belgian or French girls would not hesitate to approach an African and start flirting with him. Why is that? It breaks the usual pattern of behavior of females being programmed not to make the first move.

 

Great post.I was about to give you rep for it but given too much in the last 24 hours.I will remember to drop it tomorrow

 

Hm I think some men are just ignoring the fact that they was being rejected.
I remember a lesson my brother learned being with me in a restaurant.
There was a guy who wanted to talk with me. I told him that I am not intrested, he just was talking more. I told him that I have a fiancey. No problem, fiancey don´t mean married. Finaly I was sitting there and looking in the opposide direction and ignoring this man and he was telling me that I am a flower that needs water to grow a beautyfull blossom, that I need a man who is caring about me and my soul.
My brother could not believe that this guy was just ignoring everything what I said or did, not to talk to him. ( We had to stay for the night in this place because we missed our train home and this was the only warm place to go).

 

I've been rejected so much, It just rolls off me. Wash your hands and keep trying.

 

For a brother to reject you BYT86 is blind as bat. It hurts though and that is why I never want to date WW in the States because of it. In Europe it does not hurt as much.

 

Aw thank you Have you experienced WW in the states to be more blunt/harsh when rejecting you or men in general?
I have only been to NYC for 10 days in 2006 and can't make a judgment

 

Truth? does that mean you have had the same exsperiences Satire?

 

I don't know whether that's true but I can't recall when last I saw Mosk posting on here...
does anyone know how she's doing?

 

BYT86,it is much more blunt and harsh here than in Europe.

 

Oh I'm sorry to hear that