Online Dating????

So, she says that she's looking for a serious relationship to attract the right kind of guy, but will casually date someone she likes until he comes along? Is that what I'm understanding you to say? And that's what guys are thinking too, when they say they're looking for a relationship?

That's not how I roll. I'm not going to play with someone until I meet Mr. Right. If I know that he's not someone I would contemplate marrying, I don't continue seeing him.

Here's what I think about online dating: It allows you to meet so many more people than you would normally meet, and then it allows you to meet so many more people than you would normally meet. By that I mean, you have far more options to meet someone, and if one person doesn't quite measure up, you have so many more options - and many just move on. Before online dating, we didn't have so many options and I think we invested a little more time into someone we met. Now, there's no need - we just move on to the next person.

 

Perfectly said Ches.
If something is damaged or imperfect, nobody takes the time to fix it anymore.
Relationships, friendships, possesions: if it's not perfect, let's replace it.
There always something new and exciting waiting around the corner nowadays.
We live in a shallow, fast moving world.

 

I never joined any site that you have to pay for, when there are some really good totally free ones.
I've met three men over the past two years from online dating sites, and my current boyfriend, I met on OKCupid, which is a good one in my experience.
We have now been together for almost six months, and I obviously never would have met him in ''real'' life.
The first guy lasted three months, and the second guy lasted three weeks lol. Its no different from meeting someone elsewhere, its just a modern day way of doing things.
Of course I had to wade through a whole lot of idiots, but lol, yeah, thats no different than any other way of life right? I got some ridiculous messages, and I was like ''do you actually expect any woman to reply to that??'' haha, but you just ignore them, or block them (and I had to do that a couple of times too).

I am so glad I bit the bullet and got over my fears and went for it, or I would never have met my man

 

Never done online dating, and after hearing 100 horror stories for every 1 success story, I doubt I ever will! One of my best friends met her husband online, he was actually in Indiana (she's in San Diego), and after doing the long distance dating thing for a year, he moved out here. They're now married with two kids. I guess success is possible online, although it seems incredibly rare.

With that said, I live in a city with over a million people in it, so I'm quite content meeting people the old fashioned way! I think there's just something about meeting someone in person, then getting to know them vs vice versa. I'm probably too much of a sissy to do online dating...you just never know if who you're talking to is really who you're talking to.

 

Online dating sucks, and so does dating in general. I've talked to a few guys from match, one was a Bm from buffalo who ended up being a controlling meathead (ex. Mentioned I was on my way to a massage appt with my friend's husband who's a massage therapist. His response, "no! I won't allow another man to put his hands on you. That's my job! A man has to have boundaries!" I met him once at that point. WTF).

Other guys at this point seem to fetishize the weightlifting stuff, or they ask why I do it because women shouldn't have muscles. Then, there are the abundance of men with kids who fall into two categories....1. Normal people who realize that the children will not die if they go out to dinner, and understand dating is part of a process that means they will go out without the kids until things are at the point you meet the kids, or 2. Psycho, clingy, helicopter dads looking for their kids next mommy.

I kid you not. And there are so few of the ones in the first category. So few.

I've tried talking to guys I normally wouldn't respond to, I've tried expanding my search. But, how the hell do you talk to someone who says English is their first language and you can barely translate WTF they're saying because their grammar and spelling is so bad? That's a deal breaker for me, too.

I guess at some point, it'll all work out, but it's frustrating as hell to be in it!

 

Thank you.

I don't know if this will help but the way we started off was very casual and being upfront about having other people in our lives so that we could lower expectations and feel no sense of obligation. It took a lot of the pressure off.

 

Isn't this dating in general?

 

Maybe, smarty pants! I've seen many more relationships develop from a random meeting though, than from online dating. I know very few people who speak positively about online dating. My personal preference is to just meet people when I'm out and about. Maybe that'll change at some point, who knows.

 

note to self move to Oregon!

 

You have to pay to play.... While running the streets match was my playground for years. When they started doing their events at local hotspots it was like shooting fish in a barrel. Those free sites never had the caliber of woman I am used to and eharmony had too many damn questions. I applied some yeah scenarios to my profile by changing up ethnicity and putting other definitely brings more matches.

I find it interesting some of you had no success and given up on dating in general.its not that difficult when you call it hanging out.

 

Damn you people are negative. smh

 

eharmony has too many selections and questions but yea I agree with this. It isn't that hard. There can be several things though. I submit to the only you can stop you from from finding the person you want.

 

Im an ugly short nigga and I found plenty of people to dqte. It aint that tough.

 

LOL you are a crazy. You know that you are not ugly, you are just fishing for compliments

 

It isn't hard at all once you stop looking. I think putting the term dating puts added pressure on. "na girl, we hanging out... Not dating. Just because we go out and I pay for everything don't mean im trying to smash."

 

thats the attitude hehe.

and lol yeah, its very easy to say online dating is crap and useless when it hasn't worked for you, but what about the people it has worked for? (me included... I'm not saying this is going to be the romance of the century, but we ARE in a relationship, and that could last or end just as much as any other kind could, no matter how we met!)

meeting new people is tricky no matter how you do it, and yes, ok, if you don't want to be bothered with a few knock backs and negative experiences, then you really aren't giving it a very good chance.
I've had some awful ''relationships'', and all of those started the ''old fashioned'' way. But I still am hopeful that I may actually one day end up with a decent person.
I would never want to end up so bitter and cynical.

 

I have had great online relationships and a few less than great ones. The same is true of face-to-face ones, in my experience.

 

The only downside to online dating is when woman take selective angled photos of themselves to hide flaws they think they have. Insecurities are red flags.

 

I find a big part of the problem in my area is that the caliber of man I'm attracted to is about as easy to find as a unicorn. I have no interest in red necks that want to show off their nascar collection and drive around the fields in their fancy new John deere. You mention going to the theater with some of these guys, and they instantly think that going will turn them gay. I'm so tired of it.

 

Lol its a running joke with me and Tarshi. I only like compliments from one woman in particular but I do appreciate all others