Online Dating Experiment

The man virility myth breeds fetishism which isn't why most men frequent sites like Okcupid. There are plenty of sites like Afroromance and wwbm that cater to women for the "black experience". A lot of dudes on Okcupid are looking for genuine connections as are the women so those "just trying it out" types wouldn't be frequenting the site. You ever read Freakanomics? They did an awesome case study where most women excluding black women would need a black male to earn twice as much the average person in order for them to be considered an option to date. Indian and Asian men are seen as upwardly mobile and intelligent with no criminal or family bs that makes life hard.
Maybe I see it more living were I live opposed to Texas but shit is real fam.

 

I've read some of Freakanomics, yes I know what you are referring to.

There's a lot of whites and Hispanics who date here, but of course this is a largely Hispanic city. Honestly being a preppy black guy here I kinda stand out and I'm not sure if most women are into my type..I don't know if you saw my thread about that.

Either I gotta be some cowboy white dude or a tatted up Mexican dude lol.

Where do you live BTW? I've lived up and down the east coast most my life.

 

New York which I have to stay is amazing if you're an upwardly mobile black man. If you have your shit together and you make north of 60k you're golden out here, skies the limit in terms of pretty women of all races. But I do see a major difference online. Four years ago when I had a pretty good corporate job, new car, and first bought my apartment it was really easy to meet pretty girls, but once I went online that shit was a lot more difficult. When I was out I would probably have a success rate of around 1:12 online its more like 1:50. I know I don't photograph that well but damn didn't think it would be that hard especially in NY. I am still amazed that in such a liberal area with such a diverse population how many women straight up say "sorry no black men" on their dating profiles so I can imagine how tough it is in the south especially Texas.
I have a business trip coming up for Denver in March/April can't wait because I keep hearing that shit is the IR mecca. Might fly up to Vancouver too to see what they have to offer.

 

We should make a plan LOL.

Where in NY will 60K be good? 60K in NYC? That's drowning, would it not be? I make over 60K in Texas which is a very low cost of living. I want to go up there again since my dad now lives in Long Island.

Yes, in San Antonio I have met a lot of Mexican women into me. I'm not as strongly attracted to them, and of course there are some that are not into me. Like I said people have the cowboy look and I will say coming from Atlanta it's a different scene, even in terms of standards. I'm amazed at times at some of the women that blow me out. This is from going out and cold approaching in the day time.

Austin is a bit different. I need to hang out there more, but there's a bit of pretentiousness and I feel I need to have a clique and a social circle to succeed, but I think it'd be a much better place for me.

One thing that will drive me from my job here, which I love and am thankful for, is the dating scene and just the overall quality of life I feel I'd enjoy somewhere else. I've heard great things about Denver. My friend keeps telling me to work in Fort Collins. I've been considering CO HARDCORE too man.

I want to go to Montreal again but I don't think I could move there, getting a visa and all. Minneapolis I've heard is a great IR place also.

Also, your point about IRL and online, I'm amazed too, especially when I see my peers. I feel as though I excel at my age but then again I could be conceited (doubtful).

 

LMFAO

 

Well I live about 35 minutes from the city, I can actually see Manhattan from my train station, but its a very expensive county. My monthly bills including student loans are around 1900 a month which makes things a bit tight at times but doable and if you do the research and buy groupons entertainment can be cheap but that shit can be a lot of work.
My ex is from Ft. Collins went out there a couple of years ago. She lived on her grandparents horse farm so I didn't really get a feel for the social scene but its beautiful and very laid back. Not as much of a fight for success like it is out here.
Never went to Montreal but I have gone to Toronto several times and constantly think about moving there. Good opportunities for accountants and all the STEM industries, very laid back and clean. The woman are far more friendly, its amazing that its a big city.
Dude I don't think you're being conceited you're in shape with good style and a good job you honestly should be cleaning up. I use to feel the same way and when I would see girls I wanted to date going for guys who didn't have an education, usually semi drug addicts, and didn't even have a car it was clear to me sometimes it really just comes down to race plain and simple.

 

I missed that one, the man has a point lol

 

We should be IRL friends. Or at least Facebook friends then meet IRL ha. My dad lives in Long Island since he works up there.

I appreciate the compliments man Yeah I've been to Toronto twice. Any flavor you like. Montreal though...those French Canadian women. Damn. My former green self was trying to get with a girl from Saskatchewan. It would have been a one nighter but I shot myself in the foot haha. There's not much career opportunities in Montreal though. It's a college town and there's a large Aerospace engineering presence there.

I didn't know Toronto is great for STEM majors. The career opportunities for me moving forward seem to be in Colorado, California, Arizona, and Washington. I'd move back to Northern Virginia since I love it, but the above are probably more IR friendly and maybe I'd find more of the women my type.

Yes. We should go to more enlightened areas of North America.

 

Yeah email me. Next time you're in NY let me know, my chick lives in Queens and has a bunch of cute grad school friends. Don't know if you're into Jewish girls but they're all fun and two are really hot but if it comes up I never said that lol.

STEM majors are taking over everywhere especially programmers and people in UDX. I see that popping up a lot around here. I started taking some programming courses so I could kind of keep up. Did ok with Java now onto C++. This shit is no joke, I thought accounting was hard this shit is my Everest.

 

Jewish girls? I'm down. Yeah dude for sure.

C++ is hard. I don't do much OOP outside of Python and maybe some Ruby...which I'm meh at. Python is very useful. I did horrible at C++ in college and forgot much of it.

 

Yeah wondering if its worth it. I should be learning SQL. I primarily wanted to learn all this because I am trying to build a dating site of my own. I've collected months of data now I need to figure out how to write the code for what I'm trying to introduce to the market. There are two major things online dating needs and I would love to bring it to market but unfortunately requires me knowing how to code.

 

I think that's true. Few women want a "stinky ugly" indian or "tiny-dicked, paternalistic, effeminate" asian.

They're just more vocal about blacks because they're not even thinking about asians or indians

Not only that, but it must be a real mindfuck among asian men to know that women love confidence, and a white guy can be infinitely more confident about his chances with an asian girl than an asian man can.

A quote from the comments section of the study TDK linked to follows the same pattern of comments asian women make about asian men all over the web:

"As a Canadian born Asian woman….I have no attraction to other Asian men and honestly, prefer white males. Why? I think it’s cultural difference – being Canadian born, English is my first language and I’ve grown up very liberal. All the Asian men I’ve met are not liberal. They’re conservative and they’re looking for a house wife to pump out children. Not me. No way. I find it’s easier for me to be in a relationship with a white male because there’s less pressure of being forced to get married, of meeting family, etc, which I don’t want! In the past, I actually was attracted to Asian men more than white men in the past but after getting to know them and realizing their interests don’t lie with mine…*shrugs* And I find that Asian men are just too effeminate, more effeminate than I am sometimes! I’m a very tough chick and I want a man who can handle my crass humour and open-mindedness. Just my two cents…"

Not to mention they gotta see that shit all day, er'day... not to mention the inevitable antics of white boys wanting to rub it in, a la:

 

I think online dating is an artificial atmosphere. A woman ordering a guy out of a catalog (or her mediamagination) is entirely different from what she can be attracted to when she runs across it in real life.

And don't forget to also focus heavily on what you want - that's way more important what some anonymous chick wants.

I'm no expert, but when it comes to online dating, I'd more recommend sites like howaboutwe.com, because the focus is shifted a bit to the interests you have in common rather than the person and races at hand.

A woman might not realize right off that you're an astronomy nerd like she is for example, until seeing you've posted the new neil degrasse tyson movie as one of your howaboutwe dates up for grabs... and if you're an attractive black dude the fact that you're also an astronomy nerd might just trump the race taboo against you and get you over for women on the borderline

...at least for that first date, 'cause she wants to see the movie. From there, it's up to you

 

Pretty insightful

 

by the way, tdk, if you're interested in learning coding, you might want to check out codecademy.com. As I understand it, it's free and you can learn at your own pace

 

Thanks brother

 

Thanks Dark King for that info on New Jack WW. I'm getting those teasers while I'm a member of Tagged. I know those women are always too good to be true.

 

There's always some idiots that need to be eliminated from the gene pool...

Yes, I think its different about what people want ON PAPER and what they want in real life.

A wise man told me that women don't know what they want anyways

 

Who is this wise man and where do I go to educate him?

Some men don't know what they want ,,,, then when they realise what they want they are too late....

 

Fixed