NY WOMEN = TOUGH TO GET?

yes, it can be. I think feminity has changed alot in this country, but i also see a new style of feminity which is just as sexy--more athletic and healthy but also pro family, pro mother raising her children and pro country and supportive of men.

feminism tried to crush the traditional family in the US, but we saw the hypocrisy in people like Gloria Steinem (a lipstick liberal feminist who didnt defend the women who were assaulted and harrassed sexually by Bill Clinton) and the NOW organization and planned parenthood(usa) who made up the story about Jane Roe in order to push the murdering of babies as law.

 

Maybe if they didn't walk so fast we could actually talk to them...

 

This has been mentioned for years on this site. WW are hard to get in the Big Apple and it will never change.

 

but not all that hard, perhaps depends on who you are seeking

 

Y'all have aired your opinions which are interesting. But now, let the king of the dating game, the Laydeez Man speak up!!! :wink:


There has been a widespread belief about New York women coming off as rather aggressive and stuck-up. This notion has mostly been held by non-New Yorkers. But as a New Yorker myself, i must beg to differ. Im from Manhattan and the women from there,-from New York in general- are truly diligent and strong but certainly arent aggressive. They are very independent young women because up North, thats just how women are in general. They usually dont fall for the cheesy guy type but when you just be who you are, they'd be the nicest women you'd come across.I've dated many white and latin New York women and they're fantastic. You just need time, patience and realness to get a New York woman because they're tough to understand.

But sincerely, i wish the world were fair. If it were, I wouldn't be sitting here writing this. I'd be a an independently wealthy multi-millionaire playboy, on my own beautiful tropical island, surrounded by the entire world's most gorgeous women thinking up new ways to be nice to me.

But life ISN'T fair. And one of the most unfair realities is that MOST of the women you meet are not going to be decent, intelligent, together pinnacles of love, joy and self-esteem, dying to meet you and fulfill your life in every way possible.
Nope. Most women are seriously dinged in one way or another.

Many so-called "men" have a lot of growing up to do... because they aren't conquering the situations that require them to "man up" and take charge of their lives.

An example every man can relate to is the fear of approaching strangers, especially when it comes to attractive women.

So let me ask you...

When are you going to "man up," conquer your fears and start making things happen for yourself?

No one else is going to do it for you, and your life is passing you by as we speak. Eliminate your fears, and along with them, you will eliminate the future regrets you will have if you don't take control now.

Not only will doing this give you tremendous benefits in your life, it will also automatically and dramatically make you more attractive to women.

The more experienced and attractive a woman is, the faster she can recognize a man who has gone through this, because she's already met so many other men that have.

And guess what?

If you haven't, you don't stand a chance with her.

Think about it. She gets hit on 10 times a day, and she knows she'll eventually find a guy who is man enough for her.

So, save her the trouble, and do yourself a favor. Make that guy you.

Find out which specific questions to ask her to determine if she's right for you, and whether you should rehearse your lines.

Ask her.

I frequently ask a woman, "Are you single?" very early in the conversation, or even as a way to get it started.

This gives me the information I need to know fast, and I know instantly whether to pursue the situation or move on.

If there are certain personality traits you must have in a woman, think about how you could find out this information early on.

If you want a woman who is athletic, ask her if she works out.

If you only want to date a woman who is a vegetarian, ask her about her favorite restaurants.

If you are trying to avoid the "party type" and you are looking for a "nice girl," ask her how often she likes to go out.

Doing this will not only save you a ton of time, it will also let a woman know you are selective, which in turn will make her work harder to get your attention. Use it.

Should you ever "rehearse" set lines or things to say to a woman?
People are accustomed to having the same, word-for-word conversations all the time.

It's part of the natural flow of conversations, and once you are aware of it, you should take advantage of it.

The first step is to think about the questions YOU are asked all the time, and to come up with great answers.

For example, my friend Steve noticed that women often ask him where he is from because he has an accent.

He used to simply say "Australia"... but now he says, "You American girls are all the same, first you ask where I'm from, then you compliment me on my accent, then you want to by me a drink. And before I know it, you'll want to take me home to show me your stereo."

Nice.

There is no reason to have lame, boring answers to questions you hear every single day. Get them good and women will notice, because you'll stand out from all of the other guys who say the same old things.

 

***takes notes from the master***

 

It's official... the ladies man has spoken.

 

And he's spot on. Women want a man who is brave and confident but not smarmy...not that he has to be a perfect conversationalist, but sometimes you can feel a bit preyed upon to be watched, chatted up when you're going about your business...keep it fun, light and natural, and if everyone is honest with each other right from the start if they're already attached, there can be no problem. Women at the same time know what they want (specifically) from the man they're dating...and you can work out fairly early if they can give it to you, so what's the harm in giving it a try?

Me and my man both saw each other and thought the other one was beautiful...but if he hadn't had the guts to go for it and just speak to me in a natural and friendly way, and with a bit of panache and slyness in not being oversleazy, I'd have missed out on months of fun, since there's not a chance in hell I'd have initiated anything! :lol:

 

Good post Chris...I certainly agree with you on making things happen for yourself, on being authentic and original, and on having something in common. And on a side note...I just got back from Miami for New Year's, and if I wasn't married to a beautiful woman now, well....never mind.

The point I want to make is don't look at them as NY women. Are they really all alike? Even if they were, the category is too limited and self-defeating in my opinion. What? Do you become a different person in New York, than you were in Miami. No. Just be the same interesting, lovable guy you always are. Each woman is different, and will require a different approach, and some of them are not even from NY, which may turn them off while you put on 'NY Woman pickup' act. I lived in NY for 5 years and I only had two categories: women I wanted and women I didn't want.

 

Its not so much that NY women are hard to get...its just that relative to what you're getting in return...its less than what you get from women in other parts of the country. You have to beat your brains against the wall for a NY woman who (compared to say a Southern woman) is not as hot, not as good a cook, not as charming etc. I'm not one to objectify women...but its akin to paying $90,000 for a Toyota...when you can get a Mercedes-Benz/BMW for $80,000

More bang for the buck (pun intended). :lol:

 

Not saying its not true, but has never happened to me. I confess though I was an assistant to the head of public relations and scouting for a modelling agancy when I lived there and actually got to go through a head shot book monthly and pick the women that would come to model for us in New York. Lucky me!

Alright, bragging aside, i still never had to "beat my head against the wall". I mean you win some; you lose some. Right? And come on, are Southern women really that much hotter than New York women? There are so many different kinds of hotty - white, puerto rican, even black. Just take a walk down 5th Ave. and you'll see plenty of hotties. Granted I wasn't looking for marriage material at the time, but there was a girl I dated there, well ....never mind.

 

It's true. I do ok but there ARE some weird dynamics here. Especially when you get into the whole IR thing. I've lived here 30 years and i've
travelled extensively to other places and there definitely is a difference.
One can debate the reasons (they get harrassed more, they need to be
stronger to survive...whatever) but the difference is there. A lot of
visitors say this and they are not hallucinating. One can do alright here
but your average guy needs to navigate the minefield so to speak. She
knows where the mines are planted and she aint about to let you know. Say the wrong thing and it's over. True in most other places granted, but it's really on a different level here. Less true maybe for some who
are highly succesfull. I'm referring more to the blue collar type or the guy between 20 and say 50 grand a year. I know personally my approach is a little different in NYC than it may be in Fla. for example.

Bottom line---If you get 3 good dates here, you could probably get 10 in some other state for the same effort.

 

Exactly. As they say, if you can make it in NY, you can make it anywhere. The same applies to women. If you can get one here, most likely you can get one anywhere. I have lived here my whole life and in my 21 years of being here I still am not quite sure why women here are the way they are, but they just are more defensive here.

They are very goal oriented, sarcastic, confident, self reliant, and independent (not necessarily bad traits but can lead them to be distant and unwilling to open up). They can also guarded toward certain men they feel they do not want. They are less willing to take chances on something new, yet they claim they do not want the same old same old, it is very confusing. As I've said before, watch Hitch, it is a very accurate example of how beautiful women in NY (or any big city) treat men who they think are not worthy of them.

Maybe us guys are just too busy hitting on chicks who are waaay out of our league and are missing out on the average looking chick who was under our noses all along (basically the same form of charity we are asking of the hotties we drool over to do for us instead of go for the rich handsome jerk AGAIN). it is kind of hypocritical how we ask women to settle yet we are not willing to do it ourselves. Maybe I am wrong and that is not it at all. Who knows? But we should not need dating sites, Dr. Phil, E-Harmony.com, or some Hitch wanna be's to find love. If men and women were just more open and honest with what they want we all would be alot happier and find love much easier. But instead everyone tries to act cooler than they really are and has all these defenses put up because we are afraid to settle or be alone, yet by doing this, all we really are doing is keeping ourselves alone.

 

You really hit it here.

 

shaft you maybe right. but it is also, as you say, a class or blue collar vs white collar approach.

 

hanging at the right spots is great insurance to meet some choice gals in the NYC--

Central Park
the bookstores
the cafes
lectures
tastings
speed dating
synagogue/church
art openings

west village
williamsburg brooklyn
brooklyn heights
chelsea
CP west
meat packing district