Nine Words Used By Women

Never used #10 either Tarshi, but then sex is the best cure for a headache so why would I?

As for the other 9, and Lippy's 10 & 11, I don't work that way. I say exactly what I mean, if I tell you something's fine, it is. If I think something's a bad idea, or I don't think you should do something, I'll tell you that. I'm a WYSIWYG (What you see is what you get), there is no hidden meaning to anything I say, and it'd be nice if people didn't think they had to look for one, but I've found the world doesn't work that way. Men and women alike seem to try to look behind the words to decipher what they think you meant, because apparently no one actually says what they mean anymore.

I actually get in trouble on a somewhat regular basis because people try to figure out what I really meant, when in fact I meant it exactly as I said it. So I've gotten in the habit of issuing a warning when I first get to know someone 'I'm very direct and matter of fact, most people misunderstand that. If I ever say or do anything that seems hurtful, mean, or confusing to you, please ask for clarification as I don't set out to be any of those things so it's likely a case of miscommunication.' Most people agree and then completely ignore the warning label, so once I've gotten to know them and can pinpoint how it's likely they are going to take something, I preface anything suspect wtih a PC type statement like 'this isn't an attempt to play games with you, and there is no hidden meaning, please take this at face value' or 'I need to tell you something, and I'm not trying to piss you off, so please understand that'. Sometimes that works, but more often than not I end up with my foot in my mouth, or owing someone an apology because they completely misinterpretted what I said. You get used to it after a while.

One thing that I do consistently is change the subject abruptly. If I can see that I'm about to get in trouble and I know that's because someone doesn't speak Espy, I just abruptly change the subject to get into safer territory before I get into more trouble than I can easily apologize my way out of.

 

lippy stands by saying less when appropriate...sometimes a man needs to figure things out on his own...at times, less is more...

i use the "i think you are confused" on my son all the time...i make him think about what he has said or done and then come back to me instead of me going into some long disertation about what i think...i want him to come to his own conclusions and then talk to me about it...it works 95% of the time

 

OMG, I could have written that, all of it.. I get that too from people that dont know me well - I say something, and mean exactly what I say - it has no loaded meaning or undercurrect.. and then they try to put meaning into my words. when there really was only what I said - a statement, nothing more.
Its like they are trying to put an emotional value to it, when there never was one to begin with, just an observation.


So I do what you do, - "anyways.".. to change the subject as I dont care to argue about something that never was there, its exhausting and I just dont sweat the small stuff.

 

Yep, you can see it in their eyes the instant it starts going South LOL! I can also see them thinking about what I've said and can tell that it's not something that should require thought so I know I've lost them... again. It's just easier to change the subject since if you try to explain to most people that you meant what you said and that's it, they say they understand but they're really just thinking 'yeah right, I'll figure out what you really said later'. :smt045

 

I use okay a lot, but not, "that's okay". I also use "whatever" when someone thinks they know it all or they think they're right and I disagree. I have to think about what words I use, but they're certainly not the rest of those listed.