New Here - Question?

Hi all I just found this site -- good stuff it's nice to realize your not alone.

I'm 21, black male. I go to a mostly white university in PA. I was lucky early on and grew up in a suburb that had an equal mix of blacks and whites. Both got along, blacks and whites mixed well for the most part -- all in all a good experience.

Most of my friends are white, but I have a good deal of black friends too. I'm really opened minded about stuff and up until recently, all the racial shit never got to me too much because I looked at the big picture and realize basically if I'm lucky, God's granted me another 60 years.

My biggest fear, (besides going blind), is sitting on my death bed looking back realizing I never got to do/be what I wanted because I was afraid of other peoples opinions. Luckily I've carried that mentality for my life but I'm having trouble keeping it sometimes recently.

I guess if I'm going to label myself, I'm the type of brother that's "all-american". but not really. I am very similar in personality to Alton Williams if you've ever seen the Real World on MTV. I'm very athletic, played college football and was all-state in highschool. I've been lucky to grow up in an open minded family. My uncle's wife is a white woman, and my parents have said they don't really care who I bring home as long as shes quality. If they HAD to pick they would prefer black but they do not care. My parents are divorced and my mom is actually dating a white guy now so its all good.

I'm used to having friends of all races and everything. Talking to people has never been very hard, just be friendly, treat people with respect and you usually get the same. But I am having problems from black women.

Like I said earlier, I just turned 21 and now am getting serious attention from black women of all ages. I'm athletic, 6'3 about 210 muscle but not some steroid guy. Now I love women of all types. If you are hot, you are hot! But personality wise I just like white women and they like me. But when I speak sometimes from black women, I can just see the dissapointment like 'oh, you date white girls don't you?'.

We'll fuck yeah I do! That's what I want to say. It has nothing to do personally with them, I never say this because there is no point because they won't listen, I'm already one of THOSE brothers to them. I like me some black women too, just the kind that ironically... usually date white guys .

So I guess what I'm saying is, how do I keep my head on straight with these women?

Regardless, I'm not going to stop dating white women. I get heat from them I guess because I'm intelligent, can kill it in the classroom or a debate but am people smart/ street wise whatever. But I DO want the black women to realize it has nothing to do with them.

Any advice, thanks for reading. Cool site.

 

Welcome Authentic! Good question, bro. Look, you're 21, you're in college and you're having the time of your life. College is the time to explore all your options with women. Nothing wrong with a brotha using everything in his arsenal to get the hottest chicks you can get. And you have every right to date any women, black or white, who you think is good potential to you. There is nothing you can do to make those black women think anything else about you even though you still are willing to date black women. If they don't like you dating white women too bad. There are too many hot white women around to date, and if they want to date you, then don't let other people's attitude stop you! You're gonna get hate but if you got game, you got game! Enjoy yourself at school and the forums!

 

In regards to your other post about being "black enough", I'm sorry. I see why you asked that question now. I can't believe you see the disappointment on their faces, that is crazy! I know a lot of people feel strongly about the whole issue of "acting black" and feel that there is no way to act like a color just be yourself. Don't take my other post personally. Welcome to the sight :!:

 

hey authentic! im new here too! im a 21 y/o white girl, and ive had some of the same concerns that you seem like youre having, and i definitely think youre doing the right thing! you cant worry about what other people think, all you can do is what fells right for you!

 

Welcome to the board Authentic. I really like your attitude about the situation, it's encouraging. I'm very glad to see you're not taking the "I hate black women" attitude. I hate to see that. Naturally, you're going to get that "dissappointed" attitude from SOME black women, but remember, you don't have to explain yourself to anyone.

Just because you're open to white women does not mean you hate black women or any other race of women and you don't have to explain that to anyone. It's too bad that people pigeon-hole you just because you're with a white woman, that pisses me off.

Just continue to be you and continue to nurture your relationships with ALL women. Eventually people begin to judge you by your actions rather than their own limited perceptions. Stay true to yourself.

Enjoy yourself on the board homeboy.

 

CO-SIGN!!!

PS: Go Pack!

 

Welcome Bro, remember life is too short to worry about what others think who are unhappy in their own lives.

 

You don't have to explain your actions to anybody except your God and the man in the mirror.

Whenever I get static like that, I have a saying

Do worry about my booty. Worry about your own.

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I first dated a black guy when I was 17 (24 now). I don't think I ever gave a damn what people think about anything. If you're dating anyone it isn't because you've rejected dating every other person in the world. Just have fun and forget about it! As long as you're not hurting someone...it's all good.

 

blah blah blah, trying to rationalize shit.

look, either you dont care and do what makes you happy or you keep looking over your shoulder, either way, if you dont hold fast to convictions, you will not progress.

the sooner you realize that all women are the same, black, white or the other white meat the better off you will be.

all women have needs man. figure that out before you get into a fucked up game of crayola date games.

 

also....FUCKEM. who? pretty much everybody man.

who cares, you are around a bunch of white folks?
find out who your friends are....then fuck the rest.
that simple.
pay attention in class too. that simple.

 

what's up Bro I'm 21 too man.

all I can say is do what makes you feel good.

if the girl is good to you then hey F""k what people think.

some black people think I'm a sellout cause I have white friends and I'm a 4wheeler. I say f""k em!

 

Good for you, don't let other people gain that much power over you that they will limit your horizons. There are times when people influence us more than we want to admit or think but at the end of the day it's about what feels right to you and not to someone else.

 

amen.

 

Be yourself. You sound like you got it all figured out, even when your are just 21