Never been with a Black Man

Ok so I'm wondering men.....

How do you feel when you come across a woman who tells you she's never been out with or been with a black man sexually before?

 

Depends on how many black people she has known through her life, because if she didn't really know too many or none at all at times it could turn into a situation where ou find yourself getting stereotyped alot.

Those people who don't really be around a race and don't really know about their culture and stuff the questions can be like "what did she/he just say to me?"

 

Now that my girl is resting comfortably in my bed, getting some rest from the week, I can post (LOL!!!).

"How do you feel when you come across a woman who tells you she's never been out with or been with a black man sexually before?"

To be honest, there's a combination of feeling sorry for her (that maybe she has limited herself and missed a guy that could have been perfect for her) and the silent thought that she lives a sheltered life.

If she were saying this to me on a date, however, my thinking would be far different.

My own sexual experience with white women (including the lady I'm with now) is one of "struggle"....How to fit an Escalade inside a garage built for a two door sportscar...the anatomy is not always perfectly compatible.

A lot of men fear this (sort of like a woman telling you she's a virgin).

I love this. What goes through my mind is all of the past experiences..."the struggles"....watching her grab the sheets hard with both hands, her head racing back and forth with the hair flying all around,
the thing I love the most....her screaming loud enough to wake the neighbors.....It's incredibly awesome! You really have to be a man to understand the feeling....that you are the cause of this "event."

Then, when she does not have sex with you for a couple of days, you get the cool chance to do it all over again, "re-open" her again, mold her to your size (sorry for being so graphic Kn, it's Friday).

So, when I learn this on a date, I get a very vivid erotic movie of what might be in store down the road.

I say down the road cause the first time for her might be the toughest. A man has to be extremely patient sometimes, depending on how big or small another man may have been or what she's been accustomed too.

Depending on the girl, and no matter how turned on she is, it still could can be a long first night. :cry: :cry:

 

Jeepers, BronzeSaint, could you hear my screaming the other night all the way in Philadelphia? The only thing you forgot to mention was how we bite the pillows to try to keep ourselves from screaming and waking the neighbors! My man LOVES waking the neighbors! Mmmmm...but please know that we love it as much as you guys do...it's fun to figure out how to put a giant Escalade into a tiny little garage!

 

Bronze Saint's post made me giggle - although not all black men are hung like double decker buses. Some are though :lol:

 

The only thing you forgot to mention was how we bite the pillows to try to keep ourselves from screaming and waking the neighbors!

Rose, you are right. I did forget.

And, all this time I thought it was just to bury your head in the pillow to muffle the noise. I did not know that some biting may be involved as well!

I'll have to bring this up in conversation with my lady when she gets back from having her hair done.

Interesting! Why do I enjoy hearing this???!!!

I'm going to see if I can catch her doing this next time around.

but please know that we love it as much as you guys do...it's fun to figure out how to put a giant Escalade into a tiny little garage!

Rose, this is something I've learned but still have a hard time grasping. At times, esp. in terms of how it's done, it really can feel like a consentual assault, esp. if she's "challenged to deal with a large man"....particularly that first time.

But, you know that a lady likes it if she has that big, endless smile on her face and is holding you close and wanting much more...this is true....just need to get it through my thick head (no pun intended).

 

That's just it Mistress. I don't think I'm really that "hung like a horse" ....one girl took a ruler and measured about an 8 in length cause one of her colleagues at work was curious. But, I'm sure there are longer men than that.

Sometimes I think it has to do with the width as well. And when you really love women (love everything about them, how they move, their voices, how some of them know how to dress to attract a man....how a butt looks when one is wearing slacks or jeans, the sound of their heels when they walk, hair blowing in the wind, how they hold you...I could go on), the excitement and passion may play a big part in getting and staying really hung....at least in my mind.

A vivid imagination helps as well. But, I'm sure all guys are very different....as you said.

 

Check with your lady, but for me, there is a fair bit of pillow biting involved! Now you have me wondering if my gentleman has noticed or if he has been too busy, what with trying to "park the Escalade" and all!

I have thought about this, and I think I understand why I love the experience, despite it's similarities to "consensual assault." In my relationship, my man is much more dominant than I am, but he also is strong enough and has enough integrity that I would place my life and my heart into his very able hands. As such, I certainly prefer him being larger and stronger than I am. Why would I want to be with a man who was small, or one who was timid in any way? Also, it brings us closer, having as much of him as possible, inside of me! And he loves how much I crave him...

 

having as much of him as possible, inside of me!

Rose, the brain is the greatest sex organ. This one line above had me wanting to do the same to my girl. So, after reading it, I took her to the mall to get some things she wanted...and had her try on some things from Victoria's Secrets.....just some soft cotton pants since I love seeing ladies in them....and had her model them for me before buying them.

The rest of the afternoon I'll leave to the imagination...... :twisted:

I can relate to your man. I, too, am dominant. She's submissive, but a trouble maker....She likes sinful fun. She starts trouble because she likes having me "discipline" her in erotic ways...spanking or tickling her until she begs me to stop.

I love having the upper hand. She loves it, too, as she likes for me to plan things and decide where we go, etc., without it being a dictatorship. Often, I have to force her to make a decision every once in a while. She really likes leaving everything up to me...which is fine.

Somehow (I'm not sure why), these roles lead us to great sex.

I think part of the reason there is so much interplay between Black men and White women is part of this dynamic. There sometimes is a great size difference (I'm 6 feet, 210, she's only 5'3, 110-115 for example). But, I think a lot of Black men have dominant personalities and a lot of White women love being very feminine, which is perfect for men that like to lead the way or be the aggressors in the relationship.

These are huge generalizations. But, it's interesting that the male/female roles in our relationships are similar.

OK. Back to the weekend. Enjoy!

 

I was laughing at the post as it was making me think of the pillow biting I'd been doing on Friday night :lol: :twisted:

 

I never knew that "biting the pillow" was going on until Rose brought it to my attention.

I tried to see if my girl did this yesterday, but she was not in a position to use a pillow this time. I asked her about it later. But, she turned red and said "I don't want to talk about it" as she was too embarrassed to do so...LOL.

To me, this means that it's true. She never avoids the subject in this way unless there's something to it.

You learn something new every day.

 

It's when the pleasure actually sounds like pain that you know you're doing something right...you wish you could stop yourself but you just can't... :twisted:

 

"you wish you could stop yourself but you just can't... "

I know. Even when she begs me to stop, I never do.

She loves when I do what I want to her even when she's pleading to me not to go on.

It sounds evil. But, I LOVE THIS!!!

 

Bronze, yes the similarities are interesting. I think you are right about gender roles...black men enjoying a more dominant role, and white women preferring a more submissive role...although as you said, these are such generalizations. I enjoy assuming a more feminine, submissive role, and my gentleman loves to dominate---spanking, tickling...the whole thing. He is quite tall and physically large, typical college/pro football player physique (yay!!!). I am smaller, but not tiny, but everyone appears tiny next to him! I am thankful to not have to do the planning all the time. He does a great job at it, and since I do a lot of planning at work, i enjoy just relaxing and letting him handle things. The other side though is that we respect each other. I know that he would do anything to protect me, but he knows that I would never knowingly place myself in a position that requires his protection. I would never exploit his strength in any way.

I wonder how many of us are pillow biters...it also helps during those well-deserved spankings...but maybe that information should remain "classified!!!"

Happy Sunday! by the way, sorry about your Eagles!!! My Steelers did great tonight, in spite of Ben R's MANY missed passes...

 

"I know that he would do anything to protect me."

I have a feeling he would as well.

This is very important to men....to protect their ladies no matter what.

Whenever I lock the doors at night, I know that this is my first responsibility. But, when you are a decent size (I'm probably smaller than your guy, sort of like a smaller version of Corey Dillon, the old halfback for the Patriots) and lift very heavy weights, you almost feel sorry for anyone that would try to break in...he'd literally beg the police to take him away!

Rose, it's preseason. So, while a lot of Eagles fans are panicked and upset after last night, it's hard for me to read too much into it until the real thing begins.

I like the Steelers, too. I think they'll do well as will the Eagles...they'll both make the playoffs.

Please don't be a stranger on here, young lady. You're a lot of fun to talk to.

Bronze

 

Well this thread took a rather interesting (and ummm HOT) turn!

What prompted my starting it was in seeing again where women were posting how much they knew they wanted to be with black men but hadn't been with one. I guess what came up for me is - how do you really know then? To me that would really be an assumption and sometimes things aren't as we would have hoped they would be. And often times with those assumptions come some major stereotypes that just aren't really true.

Also...I just know in talking with men that I've dated...one of the things that usually is asked pretty quickly is if I've been with black men in the past, or if I exclusively date black men. When I've asked about this I've found that many men aren't interested in being that first black man. They are more interested in being with a woman who is confident in what she wants and is past the need to experiment with a black man. She's dealt with being in public, family, friends, whatever...it's not an issue. I've found that most men I meet aren't interested in being a novelty for someone. But then on the other hand it does seem like men (women probably too) like to be able to do something with their women that no other man has done.

The size situation....LOL Ok well there are white men of size and there are black men without size. I have found that men with size have their own set of questions that they may ask. I remember one man I was with years ago having a thing about preferring women who had had children because things had been stretched out. Ok that might be reasonable - I had my children by cesarean births so it didn't quite apply to me.

I know women who prefer shorter men and women who prefer taller men. I think the point that I keep finding is that people enjoy it when others are clear about what they want.

Dominate men and all that - again generalizations. I know black men who are very assertive, agressive, dominate, etc. Others are not at all. Some are very passionate, others are not.

 

Oh for the record - pillow biting....um ok lots of it in my lifetime. But that is about noise control for me. If noise isn't an issue...the last thing I want to be doing is stiffling any part of it.

Screaming and all that goes with it can be a great thing.

However, there is also something really great about being able to stay right there focused and not release things through screaming in that way.

Probably a really bad analogy and may be a turn off for some...but I liken it to childbirth....and a woman pushing the baby out. If we scream as we push it's not effective...all the energy is leaving through the voice. Whereas if we focus deep inside and stay very present through the experience it's much different and much more effective. I think this can be true with sex too - obviously different than childbirth. But there's something VERY good about it. Sortof like how sometimes hard fast full out is great and sometimes it's very good to be very slow, controlled, deep and deliberate.

 

I just kind of like the pillow biting. For me, it's not to stifle the noise. It just gives me a great way to tear into something without doing any real damage. Also, it gives my mouth something interesting to do! I enjoy the promal component to the biting...it runs counter to my prim, schoolteacher side and my man loves it!

Not to be contrary, and certainly not to divulge any personal information, but I found screaming to be quite effective with each birth, despite what my nurse told me...it worked like a charm!