Letting go of unhealthy family relationships

My daughter turned 20 in September. She is in the Air Force Reserves and taking online classes and is a pretty good mom. My mother's reasoning is that I was a bad role model for divorcing my ex-husband after 20 years(my parents are divorced, but fail to see the hypocrisy). I refuse to put up with anyone's negetive karma family or not. My granddaughter is a healthy and delightful joy. Sure I would have preferred for my dauughter to have waited, but that is not the way life happened:

 

sounds like ur mom is just being a dip, lol

the daughter seems to be getting things in order, so i wouldnt focus on the past. I'm not a big fan of people having kids while they're that young and not married/in secure relationship, but I wouldn't constantly rub someone's face in it.

I'd just look to the future and try to build upon what's given.

 

That's my motto

 

I had to sever ties with a cousin of mine last April, for years other cousins and other family members had avoided her at all cost, but I always stuck up for her as I was under the impression she had a rough deal.

I've realised now that I had shit in my eyes, I've done so many things to help her, because she was depressed (quotey fingers) I'd drive my kids to school, then drive 20 miles to her house to drop her son to school 2 or 3 times a week or if I could manage it more than that, as the boys school had involved social services due to his lack of attendence and her lack of communication, plus i'm sure other things that concerned them.

It wasn't untill things in her household really started to deteriorate did I realise it was a bit more than depression!
went into her house one day and it was the worst I'd seen it ever!

For some reason she always had fruit shoot bottles around and instead of risking a cup of tea in her crappy kitchen I swiped her fruit shoot bottle and had a sip, not a fucking fruit shoot in it at all........she just used the bottles to decant her red wine into so she could drink undisturbed wherever she was.

She's an alcholic and I tried to help but I can't, because I don't understand how she can booze the day away and let her life and her childrens fall apart in the process.:smt022

Apparently the rest of the family knew she had a drink problem, the only reason they didn't mention it to me is because they thought I knew already.

 

It's amazing to read these replies. One thing that they have in common is the idea of family only considered to be family in a biological sense. People who share your blood can be your worst enemies at times. True family extends far beyond the name. It's best to just salvage the family members you do get along with because everyone in your family is not going to like you. Jealousy is real.