Is there really double standards in dating overseas?

Luckily, we don't play garbage music. :smt081


But for real, though, my we get bitched at all the time by the downstaris neighbors at our friend's house for playing music too loudly, but since they're a bunch of ghetto ass, meth doing, drug selling while the kids are around, kitten neglecting motherfuckers, we don't give a shit what they say. They're just piece of shit drug dealers to us. If anybody else complained, we would tone it down, but nobody else complains anyway, but we be loud out of spite, now. :smt081 Fucked up, but we don't like them mofos. Mainly because they have a bunch of kids downstaris with them with all the drugs n' shit around, and they have a kiten that is always crying.

 

Glad my friends don't live by you. Wouldn't want my friends to get fucked up. Although, one of them is one of those natural farmboy strength having motherfuckers. His family is known for having massive tree trunk limbs and bear mits for hands, so it would be a challenge to take him on.....while he's drunk.

 

anyone that told you strength alone wins streetfights....needs to give you a refund



like i said...that shit can make you absolutely crazy (im pretty calm for a black guy ) if you can't get sleep or get any peace in the privacy of your own home....

a guy shot up his neighbor because she wouldnt turn her shit down...he banged on her door, asked her to turn it down..she didnt....he went back and got his heat, blasted her the same day



on the other hand...i do realize there are both sides to a story...If I knew i was a dickhead, slamming my weights around, jumping rope, and punching walls and shit, I wouldn't complain about loud music. But I dont and that shit is in my lease. Don't people read English anymore?

 

Dude is crazy for shootin' that girl.


And I don't think the ghetto heathens downstairs can read.......or work.....or go to school. :smt043

 

if they're rowdy then I can't blame you for not caring. Luckily for me, everyone around here is on the grind. So, if i have a day off, I only hear shit for an hour or two, then it's really quiet. If they didn't work, I'd be hearing fucking, arguing, slamming, music...all that shit that makes you wish you had a single home.

But yo, I heard in another incident, a man confronted some people that were loud and obnoxious in his apartment building, and they blew the wig off his ass like he was wrong.

lol

believe I carry a baseball bat when I go knockin on anyone's door...u see the words Louisville Slugger on it dont u

 

Yeah, when people are out, you ain't gotta worry about noise. Now THAT shit is fucked up about them fools shooting dude like he did some shit. Hella messed up.

Dude, when my dad lived in this one complex, his downstairs neighbor was loud as shit. She was always arguing with her boyfriend, getting her ass beat and breaking windows. I would only go over to my dad's on the weekends, but I probably heard their window shatter 4 or 5 times when I went over. We would hear yelling for HOURS, in the middle of the fucking night and slamming of something. Some of those times, she was getting her slammed into some shit. Then, she would bring her annoying ass upstairs, crying to my dad(because my dad is one of those overly-generous folks and the shit has somewhat rubbed off on me) and talks with her and tells her to leave the dude but she doesn't want to. She says that while holding a straight and swollen face. Then she goes back downstairs and makes up with her boyfriend, only to get fucked up next week. The shit was so annoying. I would hate when she actually came INSIDE our apartment. I didn't want to talk to her cig smoke smelling ass. Back then, I wanted her to leave him just so I we could get some peace and quiet. I didn't give a shit about her well-being.


I don't wanna go up to people's doors with a weapon because they might pull out a gun and fill me with some shit I don't wanna be full of. :sad:

 

lol

id hate for anyone to visit my place...the walls are thin, the floor is paper...u hear everything :smt119

but u gotta start somewhere right

if I had cheddar like that, i would have a house or one of those swank apartments downtown with the cement flooring and sound-proof walls

 

For real, though.

 

I am right behind you

 

best you give that shaft a push then....i'm still waiting at the airport

 

I don't know why but I have the urge to say no homosexual lol

 

lol...i can see why

 

As we speak, a specialized squad of elite, highly trained Macks are gathering intel and being equipped with the latest triple magnum condom technology. Maps are being drawn, tickets priced and pennies saved in a big ass office water cooler container next to the lava lamp.

I'm afraid that's all I can reveal at this time about Operation: Chocolate Menace.

 

what about me tarshi

 

lmao...operation Chocolate Menace...and what a menace you are...!!!! why do i have a feeling that you're just giving me lip service...???

speak with shaft & maybe you can join in with operation Chocolate Menace

 

On the track of the original post...


People who can't see the forest for the trees need to figure out why they keep sticking to the same set of woods.

If it appears there's a gross generalization to an entire race/gender/what have you, based on your own personal experience...and a large amount of people tell you this is not true, then perhaps it's time to expand your social circle and examine exactly what it is about -you- that is attracting such unsavory characters. Or maybe subconsciously you're even attracted to them right back. Regardless, there are very few blatant blankets that surround people, though there are common threads. If you don't like the threads, then put on another fucking shirt and read a bit more. Explore, don't just lump people into a category and move on.

 

Just arrived - several days late. Are you still there?

 

Late response to a good discussion

, i have to agree that it is very crucial that a person understand the damage done when a person makes very broad generalizations about people - espcially the opposite of sex. I am sometimes guilty of this myself and when I speak on this subject of "men are... women are..." and sometimes i try to catch myself when i do make generalizations.

there are always exceptions to the rule.

i agree with earlier comments from both MrFantastic & Espy. even though they disagree with each others opinion i'm glad to see that atleast they are on the same page.

sometimes its a issue of geography/economics, social environment, culture and class and family environment in which a person is raised. Living in a upper-middle class american suburb or urban environment, a major town/city vs the south or middle states.

It is very hard for people from other cultures - especially certain types of american white people and even more so with certain types of american WW to see the adversity that BM & BW have to face within their own race here at all levels (rich,middle-class & poor) in the USA. Espeically when it concerns Sexual Politics, the dating game, family, Lookism and materialism will always be a very complex discussion/issue.

There are some very talented filmmakers i think that try to show this complex competitive stigma. People like Tyler Perry, Spike Lee, John Singleton, and few other lesser known have created films/documentaries that try to ask and answer important questions.

in a recent dateline news item the issue is brought up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCoI-B9AYjs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYLeeHgjOCY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdxOLRVvIJY

i have to agree with DJ_1985 on this one. this holds true for me espcially. Many times as young guy i felt like i wasn't good enough. I had the misfortune of being raised up in a very socially competitive black middle-class social environment. I was indirectly taught to hate myself at young age ontop of having complex family issues.

in the environment i was raised in order to have friends and dates you MUST have 1 of 4 things going for you.

A) You must have superb looks (face, body, hair, skin color-complextion)
B) You have to have a strong sense of humor (class clown, comedian)
C) You have to have talent (you must be a rapper-actor-performer)
D) You have to be a talented athlete with opportunities
E) You parents have to be rich - you have expensive material things (cars, clothes etc.,)
F) You must be a A-Student who's going to IVY league college (you have to be the A-List Student in the elite class).

the looks issue i see now, is alot tougher on women than it is men IMO.

the friendship game, the family game and ultimately the dating game was so very competitive that i believed that i was never smart enough, handsome enough, or talented enough to have girlfriends and/or just friends. And i wasn't according to the social atmosphere I was in. So everything from color complextion to your actual class (rich-middle-class or poor) was always a issue.

It wasn't until recently 6 yrs ago that i met some international ladies both young and older (german, british, swedish, austrialian, french) both in person and over the net that i shared my childhood photos with that i began to see i had nothing to be ashamed of. As of 2010 i feel i have aged very well ('m 28 yrs old), i lost ALOT of weight (45-50 lbs) and i'm very fit now and plan to get alot better too when i have the time to do some serious bodybuilding/fitness etc.

As far as attractive american women being materilistic, egotistical, self-centered feminists etc., well its a question of the environment that person/woman is in and how she was brought up as a woman. Me personally, i grew up around this type of woman whether she is a preteen, teen, in her 20's, 30's middle age or even a grandma. i was in the company of alot of what the men in my family call "divas"

the "i only date the cutest guys and i always get my way" is very typical in the world i was rasied in.

the show Basketball Wives is a good example of divas. that is a pretty exotic woman who is obnoxious and materialistic, self-centered, drama queen who's looking out for herself only.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5MWVAmFhjo

A former coworker i used to know, who is from Ireland had broke up with his girlfirend back in 2005. he would come to work with his head down, feeling sorry for himself and going thru male depression. According to him she broke up with him because she clamed that "A man going out with me has to atleast be making $60,000 a year at a minimum"

but i see that being that he was irish that he wasn't brought up in the materialistic society of the USA he couldn't cope with not being successful enough. And according to him, his parents are hard on him back home in ireland because they don't understand why he can't find anybody.

but the issue is differences in culture . I hear lots of ladies say that there is nothing wrong with having some standards or even high standards and that why should they lower their standards just to make the men around them feel better about themselves. and i partially understand this logic.

A black friend of mine married a woman from cameroon (west africa). She was a very attractive african woman who used to do some modeling and was educated in France. My friend met her in France and bascially she really catered to his male ego. for my friend this was the quality that he feel in love with.

However now that she has been in the USA for 15 years (they have two kids together) they are both having marital problems. According to my friend she has "lost all of her culture" and its partially from being "exposed to american black women and seeing how much power they have."

And i have actually seen what type of mother she is, and she is SELF-CENTERED and she is also a terrible mother as well. She is cruel to her two little boys and the family is really suffering as well. but the issue with my friend is that she "changed so quickly" and that he was just shocked and suprsed.

so there are 2 examples off the top my head.

However back to the issue of looks. Lots of women who are actually attractive don't feel like they're pretty enough or successful enough to be desireable, when they do actually have sex appeal.

I think also a good thing to mention is romance movies in the USA vs. romance films in other cultures/counties.

here in the USA, in order for a romance film to make money, espcially if its a romance comedy film, it usually shows a woman and a man competing with each other. competitive love. the male character is usually a male chauvinist pig who's cruel, insensitive, and egotistical and the woman is a obnoxious, materlistic, self-centered, sexy woman, who's basically a bitch. And before the man and woman can love each other they have to compete with each other. Its competitive love.




or even a film like the movie "the notebook" bascially ryan gosling's character goes thru hell and high water to IMPROVE his situation (his status) so that he can earn the love of of this woman.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU

she has to RESPECT him financially/status wise before she can love him

vs in other countries like France.
a recent film called "lady chatterly" starrring Marina Hnds

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mmym0sbR8O8

a woman identifies a man, makes sacrifices and she tries to inspire him to be all he can be.

i am aware that some of these countries are traditionally chauvanist cultures and the govt controls movies and tv. but there is a difference.

I personally used to have a strong prejudce against young attractive women (17-30 age range). Especially latino american and/or black american.



i always saw myself possibly being with a attractive fit older woman (mid 30's -40's) who takes care of herself / has a beautiful personality who's nice, because up until 7 years ago, i had a negative attitude towards young american women.

It wasn't until i 6 yrs ago that i discoverd the old family shows from the 70's and 80's (little house on the praire, the waltons, bonanza etc.,) and started looking at international movies did i begin to see young women in a more positive light. I'm actually greatful that i got the opportunity see what else is out there by reaching out this way and talking both in person and via the net to international women in certain countries.

what i read here and what i hear confirms to me what i must do if i ever expect to have any happiness.

my situation has been so bad at times (in some ways still is) that i don't really want my significant other to have ability to speak english. This way i won't have any problems, i have a strong desire to lean to be fluent in other languages. i believe this will help neutralize alot of non-sense that i have to face everyday.

i'm fortunate because i'm going back to business school next month actually. And i will intentionally try to aim at a career that allows me to travel and possibly live outside the USA. I'm hoping to go to france or germany.

in the mean time, i spend time just preparing myself in everyway possible to leave.