I just can't with internet dating.

I swear CRAIGSLIST is the craziest site you could think about to meet somebody. There's this black guy who posted a picture of a wedding gown and says it's on hold for the right woman. Then there's this Russian guy I actually wrote back to, sent my picture and all, and he emails me: well what are you looking for: husband, boyfriend or sex? Guys, the only thing I could answer to that, was: whatever I can get darling, maybe I'll just get f***ked, or maybe I'll get proposed to! He actually wrote back again and asked my age.

I CAN'T. I QUIT. Then on another dating site a 57-year-old man wrote me a long heartfelt letter and I replied that I'm very flattered but I'm looking for someone closer to my age. He got pissed off and wrote to me the following:

"I understand. When you get to be about 40 to 50, you will realize that pursuing men your age, "back then" (now actually) resulted in finding men who will tell you what you want to hear to get what they want from you. But like most women, by the time you realize that, you will be another 40-50 year old, and the men who have learned how to treat a woman like she deserves, will be looking for someone like you are now, because fat old women are everywhere and desparate for a good man. They are common. You however are rare, precious.

That is, rare, precious if you realize now what other women don't realize until 10-20 years from now. That the best relationship you will ever have is with someone like me. Including my age."

 

Thats too funny! But on a serious note, it is hard to find someone :?. Which makes it all worth it when you do. All you can do is move forward there out there somewhere!

 

Moskvichka, i feel you on this. The internet thing just makes me flat out weary sometimes. There is one girl that i've been talking to for over a year now online, and things are still going great with her, but if i weren't talking with her, i don't know that i'd be willing to talk online with anybody else on a serious level. If i weren't talking with her, i'd just be done with the whole thing quite frankly. Honestly, i feel like meeting a decent person online that you can really grow to care about is more about luck than anything else. I dunno. That's just my opinion on it though. :wink:

 

It's funny because you seem so cool and down to earth to me [and cute from a picture I saw a while back] but these are the problems that all people in the dating game face.

It's not just the internet.

But this is also why I say if you can find someone you're okay with then good for you no matter where you find them or what others may think.

Side note:
I read a book about the future of mankind and it talked about relationships and how we would all be in very short term relationships. We seemed to be moving in that direction....

 

I am in the same boat you are. I am trying to do the internet dating thing but yeah grrrrr is all I am saying.
Preferably I would like to meet a guy just by chance meeting, grocery store, stuck in traffic, shopping etc. but there aren't that many BM around where I hang out or run my errands so I feel the chance of meeting a BM who is into WW on the net is higher.
Craigslist, I am actually afraid of... this is the one site that I am very weary about to many freaks out there. BUT... my good friend here in Chicago met her boyfriend on CL. Met up for a Baseball game and here they are together talking marriage

I know many many people actually who met online, some are in relationships, 2 friends of mine married the guy so it works. It's just that the bar scene basically moved to the internet now. Where they used to be on the prowl at the bar it's happening on the dating sites. To many people just looking for some ass.

Moskvichka, try plentyoffish.com, it's free but a bit better than CL. Good luck hunting :wink:

 

i think internet dating is all about how YOU decide it is going to work for you...i have met online quite a few really great guys...infact at one point i was a little overwhelmed by how many there were to choose from...i have done the drive by coffee date (chi inspired)...dinners...movies...etc

i wouldn't suggest craigslist to everyone...this is for the more savvy internet dater...you have to be really careful about weeding through the bs on this site...but strangely enough i did find a couple of needles in the haystack that i thought were quality men...it would actually be acceptable to ask an upfront question like...are you looking for sex? dating? ltr? why waste your time beating around the bush...get those direct questions out there and if you don't like the answers...NEXT!! keep moving until you do find what you are looking for...i also do not suggest that you spend hours, days & weeks emailing or talking on the phone...do your preliminary screening...push for the meeting...no more than a 15-30 minute coffee date to check the chemistry and then take it from there...

don't give up...if you do you then some really great guy out there missed the chance to meet you...that needle in a haystack :smt024

 

Thanks for the good advice Lipstick. And one more thing I think: you can't let some idiot hurt your feelings. I actually got upset today because of something that some Craigslist jerk said to me. :evil: It was totally intended just to make me feel bad, and it worked!! :evil:

 

I think there are better sites out there than Craigs List. I'm not sure about the personals on here. I've found interracialmatcher.com to be pretty good.

I completely understand your feelings! I was talking about the whole dating/relationship thing on another thread.

Chi inspired me to jump back out there. We shall see. Right now I'm thinking I may be a bit too gun shy to be talking to anyone. But maybe being cautious is ok too.

 

i have used blackpeoplemeet.com...talk about being a kid in a candy store...strangely enough quite a few bm on this site are loving ww...

 

I agree that blackpeoplemeet seems to be a good site. The problem I find with most sites when it comes to IR dating is that there are never enough women in the particular area where I live.

I've never actually dated anyone I met off the internet.

 

Yeah, craigslist is ok if your looking to buy a used bicycle, but I would stay away from their personals. Its filled with weirdos and escorts. Also, stay away from their joke section. (Some of the most hate-filled, racist stuff you ever want to read.)

Lipstick, thats the site I was refering to when I started the "WW-Bolder and Making the First Move" thread. You are right about being a "kid in a candy store." I met a lot of nice ladies on that site.

 

I wouldn't have thought it was really "Ok" as a ww to post and ad on the blackpeoplemeet.com.

But since it seems to be, I'm going to give it a try.

Of course I may pull it in a couple of days too!

I'm not really one to approach the man though. I would rather they approach me...especially on a site like that.

 

I swear KnCa you and I are so alike, I feel the same way about putting an add up on an that site but I think I may check it out.

As far as approaching... online I actually like to initiate the contact...

 

be prepared ladies...they don't even give you a chance to shop around...i think i got proposed to at least 6 times...a couple of offers to move to colorado...i did meet a great guy in minneapolis from the site...another in las vegas...atlanta...new york...chicago (there is a guy that i had a weekend rendevous with that is now on the site) can't miss him chi...vincent is sooooo damn cute...

get those profiles up today and report back to me LOL

 

I posted one on this site too.

Oh geeze - what have I gotten myself into!

Chi - we need to compare notes!

My thing about approaching on the blackpeoplemeet) is that it's a "black" site and I figure I'm somewhat intruding and would rather they approach me...they may not have any interest in dating white women. Ok but I did send a flirt to someone on there. :LOL:

On inter-racial sites it's different. But I would still rather they approach me. Maybe it's because I'm pretty up front about some parts of my life (size, children, etc) and I'm not interested in those who are not ok with certain things. Personally, I've just had better outcomes from those who have approached me. There is probably one exception to that.

Actually...I don't expect to get tons of responses. I tend to be more specific in ads now. When I wasn't...I was bombarded. But then they also say most men don't even read what you write!

So here's the big question. Do you think it's worth it to pay for those sites?

Of course I probably have to work on my attitude a bit and be open to actually meeting someone new. But maybe by the time that comes up, I will be.

 

knca...if you view someone...you will show up in their viewed box...if they are interested they will approach you...i never sent one flirt to anyone and got viewed/flirted/messaged so much that it was hard to keep up with the messages...i got to the point where i just couldn't respond...there are quite a few ww on that site...the men probably out number the women 10 to 1...so have fun with it!

 

ooooooh :lol: Ok!

Thank you oh wise one!

 

knca...did you put a picture up? for best results at least add one picture...you can look at my ad...i think it is still up but i have taken the picture down...my membership is about to expire and i am not looking anymore since i am with magic...do a search pjl62464

 

Glad to hear you guys are back on!!

 

What about you Fnny? Are you joining the "hit squad" lol or are you off the market?