How do you feel about dating a WW/BM who hangs around nothing but people your skin complexion?

Is this something you are comfortable with or would this make you feel uneasy or insecure?

 

Great question!
I'm actually not sure how I would feel, because I've never really thought about it.
I guess it would seem a little weird. How likely is it though, in reality?
My man works with a largemajority of white people, but he does have black colleagues he hangs with at work too.
Outside of work it's the other way around. His social circle is almost entirely black apart from a few exceptions.
I was nervous at first about how they'd feel about me and if I'd be accepted but they were all absolutely lovely and it feels like they are my friends too now.

 

I know this doesn't address the op question, however I don't think it's weird at all. Most of my girlfriends that I hang out with are black and I'm usually the only white one and although it may appear as a bit unusual to others, I don't feel awkward.

And it's a stereotype if you would classify me as a "down ass chick" because that has never been me or some facade I was trying to portray.

I wouldn't care who my guy hung out with as long as they seem like morally-sound people who treat him and others respectfully.

 

Been there done that with the white chick with nothing but black female friends aka "down-ass chicks". They tend to pick up all the bullshit I'm trying to leave behind i.e. drama, lowdown ghetto behavior, foul mouth, listens to nothing but bullshit rap/r&b etc etc etc. I could tell you stories. No thanks

On the other hand, brothers who have mostly white friends are motivated and civilized

I can feel the fake outrage building from here, come at me lol

 

I think it's a bit odd if they really hang around NOTHING but those who are of a different skin complexion, unless they are truly living in an area where that's all there is. I'm not sure that really exists anymore, at least in the US.

IDK as far as the "down-ass chick"...wouldn't they be "down-ass" with other people too though?

Now on the other hand, I think it really depends on if you are talking about ALWAYS. I mean you may see someone once out with a group of people and they are the only white/black/asian/whatever person in the group - that doesn't mean it's always that way and I don't think that's a big deal.

 

For me, it's about her not her friends, to a point.

What race or ethnicity her friends are wouldn't really matter to me.

 

I'm only concerned with whether or not her friends have healthy relationships. If her friends can't keep a man then it raises a red flag. "Birds of a feather......" If her friends have shitty attitudes or conflicting values, how long before their undesired ways rub off on her? The reason why her friends are single is what I ideally would like to know, but we all know its always the mans fault.....Lol. If I can't get the perspective from the other side then there is no point to asking.

 

I couldnt really judge. I have a few white friends and work colleagues I socialise with who are white but I also know a lot of black people who I met through work or old relationships. Its not unusual for me to be on a night out with friends and be the only white one in the group.

 

A white chick who ONLY hangs around black chicks? NO THANK YOU -- not for anything serious anyway...

As quick as bw are to diss black men... that white girl might come to think that shit is "cute"...

And you KNOW that if you have a group of more than two bw, there's gonna be at least one who resents your relationship and wants to see it fail and might work toward that end... or might try to harm the white chick in some underhanded way... or at minimum, might treat ME like shit (which I would be disappointed if my girl tolerated).

And for the white girl's part, it just might become "us" against "them" for her, with the "us" meaning the sisterhood and the "them" meaning men... Many ww identify with black girl's resentment of black men, on the basis of feminism & gender grievances... That resentment might morph into a "what happens in vegas stays in vegas" attitude when she's out with the sistren, encouraged by the sistren... Some ww have a (imho) misguided admiration of the worst aspects of black female culture and might bring that shit home.

Then there's the consideration that the ww who hangs around so many blacks might be more in love with "blackness" than she could be with any black dude... I'd prefer the chick see me as me, rather than just another black dude or part and parcel of her path to being "down with blacks"...

And I certainly don't want to hear her trying to sound like a stereotypical black chick!

If all this sounds like I resent black women, I don't. Resentment is self-defeating. If it sounds like I don't trust black women -- damn right, I do not trust the bulk of them these days. Black women are on some evil shit these days when it comes to the interests of black men. Certainly not all, but enough of them that I think you gotta keep your eyes open.

Shit happens, including ugly cultural trends. I wouldn't want the shit that black women regard as "strong" to rub off on my woman.

To each their own and may they be happy with it, as long as I can do my own thing in peace... but I don't want it in my bed, thanks.

 

That's a good question. I would think it's a bit odd. I can see it possibly happening in cases where a child grows up/attends schools where the percentage population/student body is nearly all of the opposite race.

I did a real case some years ago when I first moved to the Wash DC. He was quite the friendly BM, but from my understanding is that he hung out with white people, and dated WW. In face... If you didn't see him, you'd think he was a WM.

 

An accurate observation .............not resentment.

 

I wouldn't care what friends the man I was dating had, as long as they weren't the type that only smoked weed and watched television all day long.

 

Ah why now, the Ganja gives them special revelations. You should count yourself blessed to be his Rasta queen

 

Nope, I can't stand to be in the same room as stoned and high people.

 

Me neither, was just kidding. Have never smoked, neither ganja nor cigarette.

 

Applause!

 

I don't smoke weed and don't closely associate with stoners, and barely watch TV. Booking that flight to Oslo

 

So when are you coming?

 

Oh, I wish, dear @Reverie, those pale blue eyes alone are worth the trip

 

So sweet of you to say so.