How Do I Help This Girl?

A friend of mine has a problem. We're very close friends and have been for quite some time so naturally I'm concerned for him. He has a little sister who has a lot of promise in becoming successful in anything she chooses.

They come from a less than fortunate background and grew up in a very bad neighborhood. He is the first to graduate high school and go on to college in his family. His sister has a lot of promise to do the same. She had written a paper on the Vietnam War and it got a lot of praise. The school counselor said she hadn't seen such "astounding writing" in a high school student in so-and-so years. They encouraged her to write more and forwarded it to NYU to see if she was eligible to take a class in journalism (expense free) as a junior in high school. She was accepted and she should be starting this class once school begins for high school students.

The sister lives with my friend and she does not have any Mother or Father figure in her life. Most of the time he is either working or in school. He looks after her as best as he possibly can. Recently some high school drama happened and his sister is going off about "fighting this b*tch."

He has tried talking to her like a Father figure. The talks seem to not be working for her.

If she gets into a fight with the girl at the school she'll be immediately expelled. Being that she is a junior they would transfer her to an alternative school in the city. I've met his sister on numerous occasions and she's extremely bright and intelligent. I want to help this girl but I don't know where to start. Does anybody have advice?

 

I think she needs professional help.. she seems to be very intelligent..and it would be horrible to see her destroying her life by herself.

 

Have her sit down and write 3-4 things that she expects to accomplish between now and high school graduation. If she is as smart as you claim, then "1. Kicking that bitch's ass." won't be on her list.

After she writes them down, have her address the likelihood of accomplishing all or any of them if she lets the local pettiness hold sway over her decision-making process. Tell her that unlike young people who grew up on the Upper West Side, she has less options. If she does not want to recycle the lives of the people around her, she has to decide right now to press forward with a project for personal elevation.

 

wise words Saty, wise words!!!!

 

Thanks for the advice everybody.

 

Wise words.