Divorce and Custody...

I have a friend who was denied access to his kids by a bitter exwife. Every time he tried to see them, he had to go to court. Out of frustration and bitterness, he eventually quit paying child support. (Yes, he admits that was wrong and ended up being extradited to the state of origin, jailed for 6 months and has to remain in that state until restitution is made or 5 yrs - whichever comes first.) I feel for him. What he did was wrong, but I can understand why he did it. His ex should never have been allowed to deny him access.

 

I don't think you understood the comment.

 

I automatically think, right or wrong, that woman who does not have custody of her child has life truly fucked up.

Actually its not just the court systems that have dubbed father irrelevant and unimportant. Its society as a whole. Its in out music, culture, tv shows, commercials. Father's are deemed not necessary and this is backed up by our popular culture.

This is what I say to those women.

If the father ain't shit.....realize that you layed down, and allowed this person who you say "ain't shit" to deposit his sperm in your body. I also don't understand that a woman will deem a man worthy enough to carry that sperm...while he has not deemed her worthy enough to carry his last name.

 

You can use words like

"some"
"a few"
"a lot"
"I know a person"
"I have a friend"
"there are plenty of people who"

...and be right 100% of the time.

 

Maybe so. Apologies. In my experience, however, many of the divorced fathers I know do not want custody of their kids. They are quite content or feel more comfortable allowing them to be with the mother.

 

Why would I say all when only some applies??!! I meant what I said. Some. :butthead:

 

http://whatblackmenthink.com/guilty-until-proven-innocent/

 

I can't understand a man not paying for his child for whatever reason. The fight is hard, trust.......I know it. Because even though he had to keep fighting to see his child. His child still had to eat, sleep, needed clothes...and by not paying he didn't hurt the mother as much as he hurt his child, but you brought up a interesting topic.

If I don't pay the 1,200 a month child support they will take my license, take my freedom, and destroy my career. If/when my Exwife did not honor the visitation order....repeatedly I had to spend upwards of 10,000.00 over 4 years. Anyone who thinks men and women have to fight the same...its woeful ignorant, and just not paying attention.

 

gimmee kiss...those words offer no rebuttle and can not be refuted.

"The women I know" like it up the ass.

so?

and?

which amounts to what percentage of the population with regards to "The women I know." Don't say some...don't say all.....qualify what you say with something that can be measure.

Those can not be measured.

gimmee kiss.

 

You need to hang around with a higher caliber of man.

 

Oh, I agree! Now if anyone could tell me where to find them.... (besides on here, of course).

 

I mean I could send you an application. LOL

 

Lol!

In all seriousness, I do have to say that most of the guys on here are of a pretty high caliber. We all have our bouts of childishness and pettiness, but, for the most part, I would be happy to be acquainted with most of the guys (and the ladies too) on here. I just don't know where to find men like y'all in my neck of the woods! :smt102

 

Most divorces end up with both hateting each other so much and try the most to get to others and the kids end up paying.

I think no matter the reason of the divorce it is good to be able once in a while be together with no arguing, and talk about the kids and what the best ..also this include find the best solution on seen the kids without having to go to court .. does not matter who get the kids the other parent nice to be able to see them often..

 

Really divorce is just an American issue, it isn't as bad in other countries.

http://www.divorcerate.org/

Based on the research here, it may be best for me to pursue marriage when I reach 25 years of age or later, which would be by 2016 and beyond. It appears that the 20 to 24 age bracket is the worst time for that. Casual relationships sound best, but nothing more than that.

I also recall knowing that the AA community has the lowest rate of marriage and highest rate of divorce in America, so we should be grateful a woman of any ethnicity shows interest in us when that time presents its self. (at least that's my prerogative)

 

Maybe more there i don't know, but other countries catching up too

 

I already stated that in a custody case women are most likely given custody if both parents are fit. But my point was women have to obtain an attorney and still fight for it either way. Before they walk into that court room the husband has just as much right to the child as the mother does. The husband can take the child to his home and refuse to give the mother the child just as mothers do to fathers every day LEGALLY up until temporary or permanent custody is awarded.

I also will throw out there that when I was 12 my father was legally able to stop paying child support. He paid here and there up till I was 11 and had no visitation. He then took my mother to court for visitation. He got it. But after a while I refused (not my mother but I) I locked myself in a bathroom and refused to go and he took my mother back to court. My mother wouldn't make me since I didn't want to go so the judges order was that I didn't have to go to visitation and my father didn't have to pay child support.

 

I feel bad for you that you would think that about a woman. I do not agree with your assessment. If a fathers home may be the best for the individual child why would it make a woman fucked up if she agrees to let the child live with the father?

By saying that woman who doesn't have custody of a child is fucked up you in essence are saying that fathers are unimportant while you accuse society of doing that.

 

Hey, does anybody remember that one thread where we didn't talk about divorce and child custody and shit? Remember?? Anyone?

Yeah, me either.

 

:smt042

it must be the same thread where it wasn't he against she...


if you do find that thread, point me in it's direction