Did The Current State Of Feminism Kill Chivalry?

And I, kind sir, have done so, even when I wasn't treated like queen. Perhaps that's why, a year later, it still hurts. Because when you present your very best to someone, and, for his own reasons, can't reciprocate, it hurts. But he would be the first to tell you that I loved him and showed him respect and appreciation far beyond what some of the former women in his life did.

 

Even still.... look at it this way. If you're dating just to meet someone for a good time, that's one thing.

If you're looking for the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with, why not do these little gestures? These women will eventually be the bearers of our children. Carrying our seed for 9 months.... with their wacky ass hormones and everything. Shit, half the time we don't even stick around with them the entire 9 months. If pulling out a chair helps to separate me from the rest of the losers, it's the least I can do.

I only take issue with that gender bending bullshit.

 

You do make me smile

 

And that pretty much sums it up for me. Contrary to what DK thinks he knows about me.

 

Racking up those cooch points as usual my friend lol. I actually agree but like I said before its one thing for a woman to appreciate it and a totally different thing when its demanded. Like I've said before I love to love, I love to make my woman feel loved but not because she wants but because I want to. When things become obligatory it robs the action of its romantic sincerity.

 

It shouldn't be demanded. If a woman has to demand it, that means she's with someone who isn't giving it.... if that's the case, she should move on.

It should be expected though. If more women would expect it, you wouldn't hear so much of that 'all men are assholes' crap.

 

How come when I simply express a desire (not demand) to be treated in a chivalrous manner, I'm ridiculed? Can I get an honest answer to that? I don't think I have ever said I demand or expect chivalry. I desire it and appreciate it when it is shown.

 

I ridicule you?

 

No, and I apologize for making it seem personal. It was the fact that you, as a man, say chivalry should be expected, but when I, as a woman, simply state a desire to see it and be the recipient of it, am ridiculed and told that I shouldn't expect it. Perhaps I should have made this a seperate post rather than quoting you.

 

Different people have different views on different things. For example, DB feels chivalry is archaic where others may feel it's 'time honored'. Neither is right or wrong, you just have to find someone whose feelings on it align with your own.

Often you'll find that people who ridicule you on your beliefs are just uncomfortable with the thought of others having different viewpoints from their own. In the case of feminism, women who do not subscribe to their beliefs may be met with hostility because you can be deemed counterproductive to the movement.

 

Agreed. Although I catch more flak from men (one in particular who thinks I'm comical) than women. ;-)

Thank you for your response. I've come to realize there are boys on here and then there are men. You seem to be one of the latter.

 

If more women exoected it more women would be preaching that all men are assholes. Bottom line expect nothing appreciate everything.

 

truth, i have often had many open their traps and tell me i shouldnt like the things i do, i put one in her place at work and she knows ill fuck her ass up if she trys to dictate to me again

you cant enojy shit now days without little dictators telling you you're wrong

 

Real talk. Everyone loves the idea of freedom as long as they get to dictate yours no matter how little it has to with their lives.

 

LOL.

 

I dont think it's that "feminism" has failed to level the playing field. Not all women are feminists. A lot of men haven't changed either.

Frankly, whoever gets to the door first ought to open it because that's good manners. First dates should be dutch. Subsequent dates based on situation; if it's your birthday, I pay. My birthday, you pay. Most times it's dutch unless it's something special, like "Hey, I got tickets to see X and wanted you to come with me" if the concert or play hadn't been discussed/decided upon before hand.

Treating one another with simple courtesy is pretty basic. I don't like rigid "gender roles" because I don't think they give people room to be themselves. True connection to another person is not based on how closely you fit a role, but on who you are, in my opinion.

 

:::raising hand::: Of course. How is it anything but rude for me to approach a door first and stand there helplessly waiting for the man to open it?

 

Same thing that goes with being a man. Pulling my own weight economically, domestically, and emotionally. Kindness. Laughter. Love. Courtesy. Respect. Communication. Intimacy. Pretty simple, really.

 

Absolutely agree. There's a difference between chivalry, which came out of a system in which women were NOT seen as equal, and courtesy, which is basic good manners that all people ought to show one another regardless of gender.

 

I know a number of very successful marriages where partners are truly equal in the relationship and the household.