Blacks Are Adopting White Kids

Number of black parents adopting white children on the rise
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Grant Segall
Plain Dealer Reporter

Candace Russell doesn't mind the color of her new sister's skin. As long as the baby learns to love hot pink.
Taylor, 1, shares Candace's vividly painted bedroom in Euclid and enjoys the 9-year-old's gentle care.
Taylor's adoptive mother is part of a small - maybe growing - group of blacks who adopt white children.
The group lacks the numbers of white parents adopting black children. But officials chalk up the difference mostly to the outsize numbers of black children available for adoption - about 78 percent of the available children in Cuyahoga County's custody.
Nationwide, 8 percent of white children in public custody were adopted by black or interracial couples in 2004, the latest year available. About 26 percent of black children were adopted by white parents, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
The rates have been much closer in Cuyahoga County the past two years: 14 percent of white children were adopted by black or interracial parents; 17 percent of black children were adopted by white parents.
Historical data is scarce, but those who work in adoptions say more black couples appear to be adopting white children.
"It's part of globalization and the trends for multiculturalism, and that's a good thing," said Karen Anderson, adoption director of Bellefaire JCB in Shaker Heights.
In 1994, a federal law gave preference to same-race matches. But a 1996 amendment banned racial considerations unless they are raised by the parents seeking to adopt.
Adoption workers say black parents seldom ask for white children in general but usually accept them in the particular. And a few white children ask for black parents because of good experiences in foster care or friendships.
A white teenager in Cuyahoga's custody recently asked for a black family, thinking they would accept her mostly black friends.
The law requires children's racial preferences to be evaluated to see if they meet valid personal needs. The Cuyahoga teen's preference passed the test.
Adoption workers say some parents of either race prefer black children to help meet the greater need. Few black parents prefer white children, but many get them through foster placements, often emergency ones, which are made more randomly than adoptions. Some of these pairings bloom.
"Chris and I just made a connection," said Shirley Hinton, a black Euclid resident who adopted a white 8-year-old boy.
Chris made her feel needed.
"He was so timid," Hinton said. "You had to help him protect himself, talking to him, trying to reassure him."
Chris, now 11, felt the connection, too.
"She said she wouldn't tell anybody anything I didn't want her to, and she hasn't, so I trust her," he said.
Elaine Russell met Taylor even before becoming her foster mother. Taylor was 1 week old and in an unstable placement elsewhere when she came to Russell's home day-care center. Two weeks later, Taylor moved in.
"She was so precious and in need of a permanent home," Russell said. "I think God put her into my hands."
Black parents say they face some unique challenges in raising white children. Start with nosy strangers.
"I get looks wherever I go," said Kim Stokes of Cleveland Heights. "People go, Is he yours?' I hate that question. What difference does it make?"
Stokes said a traffic cop once grilled her in the back of the cruiser about her adopted children, who are of different races. Fortunately, she had James' paperwork in his diaper bag, just in case.
Some black parents say they hesitated to adopt white children for fear of exposing them to such bigotry.
So why did these parents go ahead? For love.
"He was a baby in need," Stokes said of a child born addicted to drugs. "Hello?"
Black parents encourage white children to learn both cultures. Cathryn Thompson, 9, of Canton, celebrates her Irish blood by wearing green on St. Patrick's Day, even at the family's Baptist church.
Some agencies offer training to prospective white couples seeking to adopt black children, but black parents raising white children may have to learn by trial and error.
Stokes' son James got sunburned before she learned to protect him. And his hair went wild until she learned to wet it down.
Adoption workers say most of these blended families live in somewhat integrated neighborhoods, which helps them to fit in.
In one hour recently at the Hintons' Euclid home, two black friends showed up independently to play with Chris.
"It's cool," Chris' friend Stanley Jordan, 9, said about the cross-racial adoption. "It's good for people to understand each other."
Despite occasional flak, the parents say they get plenty of support from friends, church, community and kin.
"My mother-in-law loves him to death," Stokes said. Her brother-in-law takes care of James during the day.
For all the challenges, workers say most adoptions succeed regardless of racial combinations. It helps that families are increasingly frank about adoption, which explains any contrasts in color.
Stokes has no regrets.
"It seemed right," she said about James' transition from being her foster child to her adopted child.
"I was the one that took him through his drug withdrawal. I took him through the first teeth. I took him through the first steps," she said. "There was no reason to place him anywhere else."

 

Wow, I've never seen black parents with a white adopted child in person, but I saw it once on Oprah. A black husband and wife adopted a little blond blue eyed white girl, I vividly remember the audience looking like this. :shock:

 

When I was in school I had a frat brotha that was dating a white girl that was in our sister sorority at another black school next door to us that had BLACK PARENTS :!: :shock: And she was all the way white too, not mixed :!:

 

It's pretty unusual and happens more with public (foster adopt) adoptions than with private adoptions. Typically they are cases of situations where the child was in the home as a foster child and then was adopted by their foster family.

I'll tell you though...when I was going through the private adoption process...I was finding that there were more and more black couples requesting biracial and even white babies. Personally, I thought that was a bit disturbing....given that there is such a need for families open to adopting black babies.

There is usually an abundance of families looking to adopt white babies no matter what the circumstances (i.e. drug addicted, medically fragile, etc)

I think if the family is the best family for the child then that's what matters. But then I may be a tiny bit biased given that I'm a white adoptive mom to a black child.

 

My thing is if that's who they want to adopt then that's okay by me. It seems that some people in our society today feel that black people aren't "qualified" to raise white kids eventhough there was a time when black women domestics were just ike second mothers in white households.

 

Personally I find it scary that you in the US can just go out and more or less shop for a child. If you want a kid, you should take what you get. (black, white, yellow, green, boy or girl) If you're making your own there's really no guarantees, so why should adoptive children be any different?

(NB, I make an exception for children with birth defects, since biological parents often do have a choice when it comes to that. I also make an exception for those cases where the parents/child already know each other.)

It's also really sad that black children (who need parents just as much as white children) have so low value in the US, that even black people are starting to abandon them.

 

Well I think it's ridiculous that people feel that anyone is not qualified to raise a child based on skin color....but of course I'm biased on this issue.

I do think that the agencies overall need to do a much better job in preparing ALL adoptive parents. White and black adoptive parents are going to face issues when adopting trans-racially and they should be prepared.

The reason that the whole thing with blacks placing preference on biracial (or even white) children for me is that the reasons that were being given were more about colorism.

The bottom line is that there are a lot of children (white, black, Hispanic) in the system needing homes....good homes. And I don't give a rip what color the people in those homes happen to be.

The issue that seems to come up most in foster/adopt situations is that there are still many social workers who are against trans-racial adoption of any type. And unfortunately, in many areas, they have more power than they probably should. Also, in many areas they have criteria that they go by and the preference is to place children in same race households. I think it's ridiculous that there are children who will wait way longer than they should to be adopted because they may have a social worker with some hidden agenda, or because of stupid rules...when there very well may be a very good home wanting that child. Then the child ends up older than the "optimum" adoption ages and without families wanting to adopt them.

 

Exactly! There are many many more black children needing homes than white children.

It was amazing for me to find out that there was a racial and gender hierarchy in adoption.

It's really become a designer baby type thing.

I have a tough time saying that I think people should just take whatever they get, just because I do have concerns with some folks adopting trans-racially. But truth be told.....I take issue with some of them adopting at all. I guess it's a good thing they are honest about what they feel their limitations are. But then I've also seen where some will "open up" their preferences if they are waiting too long for that white baby, or because of the difference in costs.

As far as private adoption goes...I think that birthmothers/birthfathers should be able to choose the family they feel is best for their child - for whatever reasons they may have. Unfortunately, many black women have very few families to pick from.

(Of course - if you are making your own and you are not open to interracial relationships then you are going to be making a baby that is the same race as you are.)

I think the thing is that adoption has changed over the years. It used to be about finding the best home for the child. It was about finding families for children. But, as the social workers told me (they have been working in adoption for 40 years) with all the issues of infertility, etc...it's become more about finding babies for families.

I can't tell you how many adoption professionals I've spoken with who have told me stories about so many families. It's pretty scary!

It blows me away to think of how difficult it was for my daughters birthmom to find the right family for her. She's a beautiful healthy baby girl. I can't believe that so many would rather pay huge sums of money and deal with all sorts of drug issues, mental health issues, etc over skin color.

 

You can say that again knCA, my sister's co-worker has been dealing with fertility issues and has decided to adopt, she and her husband are open to adopting a black child. Well let me tell you, she told my sister how the lady at the adoption agency was dead set against them adopting a little black girl. The woman at the agency told her we prefer to pair the children with same race families. :evil: When my sister told me about that, I wanted to march down to that adoption agency and go off on that lady myself!!! No telling how many white families have been turned away by this lady or other just like her, its sickening!! KnCA, since you know more about the adoption process, is there anything that can be done about racism or discrimination within these agencies?

 

Are they in Florida? I've had some experiences with adoption in Florida. I came very close to adopting babies born there on 3 different occasions.

Unfortunately...it doesn't take much to become an adoption agency and people have all sorts of agendas going on. Usually they are more politically correct in what they say though.

If they are having a tough time finding a good agency, they may want to go online and get onto some of the email lists. The thing is that there are MANY unethical agencies out there. It's best to do as much research as possible. It's amazing how many things one can find out by getting on some of the adoption lists. If I remember correctly, there are some reasons why many in Florida choose to go outside of Florida to adopt. Which is sortof interesting because there are those outside of Florida who look to Florida to adopt. But often the rules and regulations for residents are different than those out of state.

yahoo has a couple of lists that are good: 2adopt and adoptionscams being two of them.

Somewhere I have a list of agencies that were recommended to me that I would be happy to pass along.

They may have better luck going in a different direction than the agency routine too. In my case, I did a private independent adoption and I brought in an agency and attorney after our daughter's birthmom had found us at an online profile site. I was really skeptical about doing it that way but it worked. I definitely wouldn't recommend doing things that way without being on the scammers list and watching things. They would also still have to be connected with an agency and/or attorney to get on the site and already have their homestudy done.

The thing is that we as adoptive parents are able to pick the professionals we want to deal with. I had my own mess in the beginning. And yes unfortunately, I think many walk away bruised and may not proceed because of the ignorance they encounter...especially after going through all the infertility processes.

My understanding is that Florida is considered an "agency state" but there are many private attorneys out there doing adoption. I think they bring in the agency for the signing of relinquishments. There are a couple of attnys I would definitely stay away from out there too. One is very popular and I came very close to adopting through him and ended up walking away because I just couldn't deal with the way he treated black women in particular.

One thing that can be sortof nice for adoptive parents who are open to adopting black babies is that they are often able to do post birth matches...so there isn't so much risk.

Unfortunately, adoption has become big business and there is a LOT of garbage going on out there. And I can tell you that what they were told is ridiculous because I still get notifications for situations where they are desperate to find families for black babies that were just born or are due very soon....even from Florida.

 

I say black parents should adopt kids, no matter what color they are. I personally saw first hand of 2 separate occurences of black families raising white kids, with the line of work I do, which is driving for social services. I really doesn't matter, as long as the children are able to be raised and taught the right way, then that is simply what counts.

 

Jolie - In the US most adoptions are private adoptions and they are matched prior to the birth of the child. The adoption can not take place until after the birth and then it depends on the state as to when relinquishments will be signed. We really don't have orphanages here. There are public adoptions which are through our foster system. Usually those children have been removed from the home due to abuse.

It usually is not a situation where the family is meeting the baby prior to adoption unless they are going through foster/adopt. And often those children are not adopted for some time because of the process of terminating parental rights, etc. There is a huge emphasis on reunification in the US.

Most adoptions now are open or semi open with at least some knowledge of the birth family. It's highly recommended that children who are adopted be raised with the information that they are adopted. It's a part of their story and they have a right to know.

I do understand why some people would prefer to adopt a child that is the same race/ethnicity. I live with trans-racial adoption every day. It's not for everyone. For me though, it's difficult sometimes to discuss the reasons that some people have. Some will say that their family is racist or their area is not diversified enough or whatever...and my question there always becomes - why would it be ok to raise a white child in that same environment?

 

Well actually that isn't true. People choose where they live. It's up to them if they are choosing areas that are more diverse than others. I realize the US is very different than Romania. Of course there are those here who are limited in the amount of diversity that their area has and for whatever reason they are tied to that area. I think then they do what they can to reach out to other communities for mentors and such.

Definitely people try to seem perfect to social workers. However, it's amazing how much can and does come out. The truth is that many people do not think they are racist and yet will say all sorts of things to the contrary. I've been blown away by things I've seen and heard from people claiming to not be racist.

Unfortunately, different areas and agencies have different requirements on classes and such. In many situations if the family is planning to adopt a child of the same race - there are not any classes required. Typically the classes and more indepth interviews are for those who intend to adopt trans-racially and/or Internationally. There are a couple of states that have added more requirements for transracial adoptions - but then those requirements are typically for those adoptive parents from other states.

For me, the comment really wasn't so much about what social workers may determine. It was more about the individuals and them taking a look at their own mindset. But I realize that's often too much to ask for many people.

 

Yes, the couple lives here in FL, and the wife is a co-worker of my sister, so I'm not sure if they been successful in their attempt to adopt. They have been trying to conceive their own child for years, so they are more than ready for a child of any race. I get angry every time I think about these poor children who sit for years waiting to be adopted because of some retarded white supremacist ideals. Anywho thanks for the info, I'll pass it along.

 

Please :roll: , this hardly indicates Black kids are being abandoned. White parents adopting Black kids still overwhelm the other way around. I think any form of race mixing is a good thing. How disgusting can people be :x ?

 

poor race relations are everywhere..

doesn't matter where you go..

you got idiot racist white folk in canada and in europe, just like overhere..

just depends on where you go, the shade of your skin, the time of day, and the year

and you have decent white folk, living right here in the states, who would raise a black kid as if they were their own.

 

Well if Whites can adopt Black children then Blacks should be able to adopt white children..