Black Men Don't Wear the Pants in I/R.

Afterall, whose side are the police going to take in a so called "domestic dispute"?

Who's going to assisted or attended to quicker in a convenient store or restaurant, especially when there's no foreknowledge of any relationship between the two, the BM/WW next to each other?

Who's going to be watched like a hawk, for example, if one is approaching the other from behind them (not knowing they're together)?

Who's going to have more sympathy (or less blame attributed to them) when discussing their problems with their partner with family, friends, and even stranger?

Who stands to lose their promotion, get denied a job position, or even be denied entry to private establishments because of their choice in IR?

Whose more likely to be accused of using the other in obtaining social and even economic benefits?

Hmmm...................

 

as a conservative and a traditional black male, i wear the pants in my marriage. I am the bread winner, my wife the house wife; I am head of the house hold with regard to the last word, discipline of the children; control the money, the purchasing of the major products.

 

my wife is from a lower economic class, so I married down she married up--i am the black partner and she is the white

 

I remember reading your comment on "blue bloods". It struck me as odd at the time but I never said anything. Now you are saying your wife is lower income.

What gives? It is an honest question, not trying to flame.

blue blood
Function: noun
1 /'blü-'bl&d/ : membership in a noble or socially prominent family
2 /-"bl&d/ : a member of a noble or socially prominent family

 

Not a knock but a black blue blood I doubt that, maybe an old money black person. Here is the meaning of Blue blood right here. http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-blu1.htm

 

I just think it depends on who the girl is and who the guy is as in the case with Tuck. It may seem that WW wear the pants because generally...WW's that are "bold" enough to step outside the lines and date IR, are going to be more assertive and less likely to allow herself to be run by conventional ways of thought.

WW hold more advantages in society...but it doesn't mean they will have an upper hand in a relationship..(not always anyway). Many (not all certainly) WW go for BM who idolize them because of their skin...so they have a psychological edge from the outset....but when dealing with BM who have a "take it or leave it" mindset...she will be more than willing to be the equal or even somewhat subordinate. WW/BM relationships can often lean heavily to one side or the other depending on the personalities of the people.

WW don't always run relationships they are in....they only appear to. WM always look like big softies...but who is running out and getting botox injections....sweating their butts off at the gym daily....cooking and cleaning the house and taking care of the kids while working on the side? WM pretend to be subordinate....and it works.....women from other groups that have more dominant men (Hispanics, Asians, and especially those of Mid-East descent) fall for them..because they appear to be the consummate men. WW may talk about being empowered and in charge...but if you use your eyes...its not really true in a lot of cases.

 

yep, old money is the same as blue blood here in the US. Mayflower, founding father--as her family is New England mayflower--but farmers therefore, her immediate family is lower economic level than mine, while mine is wealthier professionals in the last 135 years.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colonial_mentality Scroll down I think this is what you are referring to also.

 

ok, but in the US we use the term blue blood describe founding family folk--protestant, old family. they dont have to have lots of money, some do, many dont. DAR--Daughters of American Revolution is one example, Daughters of the Confederacy is another. Thomas Jefferson Descendants another--some of the family members are working class, some middle class, others upper class. they are considered blue bloods here in US

 

1. I wish I had thought of this thread myself. It's a good one.

2. I have to say that I do believe it myself in many cases, but not all. I don't like it, but I still believe it a lot of times. Look at the way the media portrays it for example (My Name is Earl, ER, Desperate Housewives, etc., it goes on and on!)

3. TheChosenOne maybe onto something, so I will consider his thought-provoking post along with all of this.

 

i hope black men are standing up and being the head of the relationships

 

Love wearing the pants in my IR relationships

 

I'm right with you on this one. While I certainly respect and want my wife's input/opinion on decisions, I am the breadwinner, head of the family, and i wear the pants!

 

thanks Loki man!

 

chosen, i am just speaking about myself, not who the girl and guy is, just me and my life and belief

 

I think this is dependent on the 2 individuals who are in an IR relationship or relationship in general.

 

i'm kind of confused as to why this thread is called "black men don't wear the pants in i/r". to me, "wearing the pants" is a decision made that is strictly between the man and the woman in the household. the questions posted in the thread seem more "socially-aimed".

maybe i just read it wrong, but i'm confused.

 

i didn't know that you are married.

 

married?