As a single mother of of biracial son I am tired of being asked if I am raising him black or white. I am doing neither I am simply raising him as a kind considerate young man. Why do people ask that? Are you supposed raise your child according to their race and if so to bad because I refuse to choose a race for my son. He is simply a human being and as long as he is healthy and happy thats all I care about.
Unfortunately, people ask that because many people DO raise their children to act "black" or act "white". Also, depending on the child and the parents some biracial children will have an identity crisis and be torn between the two cultures they represent. That is, some, not all. We've all seen it happen. Sometimes they want to disown one 1/2 of themselves because they resent the other 1/2. Sometimes its because they "look" more 1/2 than the other 1/2.
Yes,but in this country he is still considered "Black" and you really have to "prepare" him differently than white children,imo.
i realize some will consider him to be one race or the other. i want him to be able to embrace both sides and be proud of that. i know several biracial people close to my age that call themselves black. i think it is time to change that. i intend to raise my son to be proud of who he is, both black and white. if he denies one side of himself how can he ever be whole? i plan to teach him that he doesnt have to choose that he can be both and not to let society control who he is. if i listened to society then i would never leave my house instead i choose to be myself and not listen to those who would look down at me.
Several ww on this board, with mixed children, have said more or less the same thing as you. They sort of have to choose a colour for the children. I have an impression that this is another typical American phenomenon. And I think it's a bit disturbing. It seems like some people over there don't realize there are such a thing as greys... people always seems to be forced to choose one of two sides. Something is right or wrong, or you're black or white. ... like there's nothing ever in between. If you mix milk in your coffee, you can't separate the two afterwards. Mixed children are mixed. Not black. Not white. Through my midwife (I'm getting a mixed baby myself in 10 weeks) I've come in contact with a social group group of women who all have mixed children. Through this group I've gotten to know approx 20 women with mixed children and since I've realized this is a problem in US, I've asked them if that's a problem here. (I got worried...) They all say no. It seems like society here easily accept that children are neither black nor white. Others might ask me about how we plan on making the child aware that he belongs in two cultures, and if we're planning on making him bilingual though. That's exactly what the other mums tell me as well. People might see a black-white mixed child and believe he/she is African if they don't know any better. The mums might even be asked if the kid's adopted :lol:. But people are not concerned about how to make a "black" or "white" person out of the child, rather the concern will be how to make the child be proud of both it's roots.
A lot of times when people say black or white they are talking about culture wise, not race. Im pretty sure a lot of them mean where are you at culture-wise are you a common white american woman, uncommon as in do you indulge in a lot of black culture or other if you have some sort of religious background that you want you child to be apart of. Biracial kids that have the hardest time is the ones that look biracial, because of how light black people can get and not be biracial and colored eyes, light skin and no sign of nappy hair means to a lot of people "white". Not to mention back in the day, a lot of biracial people use to choose a side mainly white to get ahead, because being black wasn't getting you anywhere. Now days being black is Cool, Empowering, Proud, etc. so some biracial people wants to pass only as black. But either way a lot of them don't say it but embrace one side over the other when it comes to culture.
My cousins are biracial and they don't like to identify themselves as black at all. They're very light skinned, brown curly hair and light/medium brown eyes. One has light facial freckles. Both girls. They have no interest in black culture whatsoever. And understanably, don't date black men at all.(which is perfectly fine) Resent? Possibly.
1000 kitties just died with that line :cry: j/k...personal preference is still a freedom that we do have in this country i just hope they aren't very pretty tho....that makes the blow much more harder to contend with
you hope they are not pretty? what kind of statement is that? childish? pretty is as pretty does...now plug in handsome and decide for yourself what you are...there is WAY too much focus on the very left to perception idea of beauty on this forum...my 12 year old son behaves better than the majority of men on this board... perhaps some of you would have turned out better with a mother like didi...i believe we are seeing a new generation of mothers raising more respectful men...my son is caucasion but he doesn't judge people based on color...financial status...it's are you nice or not nice...that's all that really matters when it comes to being friends...he has friends of many races and his little gf is biracial...in his eyes she is cute and that is all that matters...so when my dad...his grandpa raised his eyebrow...i gently took him aside...slapped his hand and told him to please not press old beliefs on something so pure...
biracial children should be raised to appreciate both sides of their heritage....but also be prepared to be looked at the same way their "black" brethren are...(I put black in quotes because the average "black" American is of nearly 20% European/White descent) Barack Obama represents a good standard....he loved his mother and her family and never tried to downplay their significance to him....he ISN'T ashamed that he is 1/2 white....but he also has said that in the U.S....he will be treated like a "black man"....and that he will have to deal with any positives or negatives that come with that.... I do agree with an earlier post that someone had....a lot of it depends on the child's appearance.....but I guess it's best for the child to be themselves and not worry about fitting into someone's neat category box
