Australian women & black men

Discussion in 'The International Perspective' started by brethard, Jun 10, 2015.

  1. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Is she lucky enough to live in the States?

    I'm struggling big time with the differences with the American I'm currently with lol.
     
  2. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    Differences as in cultural differences? Are they that significant? I have been thinking of opening a cultural differences thread, how it affects the relationship, but I thought probably I'm the only one that needs it, so I haven't.
     
  3. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    I think it's mainly the fact that he is a single child lol and seems to think that he can leave a mess everywhere and I should have to clean it up not him. Self entitlement I guess. Misperception is the biggest problem which has to do with I guess what I would assume is the fact that Aussie are a bit more subtle and reserved and don't like to offend but the Americans are straight shooters and gives it to you direct and says it like it is which is sometimes brutal lol.
    He has pulled up the race card but only a handful of occasions. His interpretation of things is definately different from mine.
     
  4. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    Hmm, interesting, I didn't even know you were living together now...
    Well, it's not all cultural anyway. Many things are just personal differences. The issue of different communication styles is also one I'm familiar with. Is it possible he thinks you should be cleaning up after him because you are the woman? Maybe different ideas of gender roles? It's definitely true that one has to be willing to talk more about what one meant and how the other person understood it and sometimes such discussions can be tiring and draining. Things that one takes for granted the other person does not. But if you guys are willing to persevere at some point you will realize you have constructed your own specific relationship culture mix.
     
  5. RicardoCooper

    RicardoCooper Well-Known Member

    I wonder just what is it that's got this mature Australian woman smiling from ear to ear. I just can't figure it out
     
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  6. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Yes we have been living together since the beginning of March. And I guess totally skipped that getting to know each other dating thing. Lol.
    I guess him n I can laugh about it afterwards I go so left field sometimes and leave him gobsmacked. But then the way he perceives me to be at times is like are for real lol. Culturally it's weird because he feels no different to an Australian apart from asking me for weird foods like canned cheese and asking me if I know how to make grits lol I've certainly learnt how to really season food and not leave it bland like us Aussies tend to do and be used to. Our disagreements definately stem from me being hard headed and feeling like a white slave at times lol where he will make a mess and expect me to clean it up which is crazy and insulting to me. I guess everyone has hiccups they need to iron out. For the most part he's enjoying it here just not used to our level of niceness apparently lol. I'll try to put a pic up sometime soon.
     
  7. Since1980

    Since1980 Well-Known Member

    That is not so lucky these days lol.
     
  8. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    Well, I haven't been to Australia but spent nine months in New Zealand on a school exchange. To me the food was indeed bland. And I also think you guys are super polite, kind of like the British. You have all these polite, vague phrases to suggest to the other person what you want and you people say thank you after every two sentences:). I am generally perceived to be a well-mannered person so I was pretty shocked when my Kiwi friend I was staying with told me years later they weren't sure.if I was enjoying myself because I didn't say thank you very much. :eek:o_O
    I know an Indian guy who is married to a British lady, she also thought he wasn't being polite enough. So I think Australians, NZers and the Brits are just on a different level with politeness. I guess your guy has to learn to throw in some extra please and thank yous and beat around the bush when he wants something:). And maybe you can believe that even when he sounds rude he still means well:rolleyes:. As for the cleaning up after him part, he shouldn't be like your child, I think...
    Oh and he needs deliverance from that canned cheese thing. I mean canned cheese?? Really?
     
    Last edited: Oct 8, 2017
  9. RicardoCooper

    RicardoCooper Well-Known Member

    You LOVE it

    :p
     
  10. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Which part? Hahaha
     
  11. Since1980

    Since1980 Well-Known Member

    I bet it's the part where your legs start shaking lol.
     
  12. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Haha! You're right we're like next level polite to the point that we are basically all angels haha jks. We definately are raised to use our manners. I get teased at work because I'm so polite lol.

    That's wicked you've been to NZ hope it was a memorable time!! I'm still yet to get there.

    And you're actually right when you say he isn't being rude he tells me that lol when I give him the side eyes lol I'm actually enjoying the directness im so used to being around people who beat around the bush. If my ass looks gigantic I need to know straight hahaah. But nah Americans are truly cool people. I'd definitely be so keen to meet everyone off here at some big party or something over there. Lol.

    He now knows what's up when it comes to the cleaning up part lol unless I'm Jamie's Foxx's maid, I ain't cleaning up after no marfuggin body!!

    Lol yeah canned cheese wtf I'd never heard of it!! We get Taco Bell here in the next few months. That'll keep him happy and he can eat all the cheese his heart desires lol
     
  13. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Hahahahahah!!!! Definitely impressive!!!! Good one!! Ha ha ha
     
  14. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    I understand now why we've been hearing very little of Becca the past 6 months. I don't blame you.
     
  15. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Hahahahahah. Well sweetheart you know what they say about the black man. Realistically I could have made an appearance on here after three minutes every day hahaha Jks!! The black man holds it down a lil longer...
     
  16. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    NZ was great! I always planned to go back to study, live, travel, whatever, but haven't managed to. There was a time my husband and I were really thinking of moving somewhere else. I tried to warm him for the idea of NZ or Aussie but he says it's too far for him. Some kind of psychological barrier I guess. So Switzerland it is now. He has started working there already but am still in.Germany with the kids. I promise after we have moved back together you won't be hearing from me for a while either;)
    And yes, that wwbm.com party should be a blast!
     
  17. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    So how come you are having time for us again? Has it got old already?
     
  18. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    That's a shame you never ended up living back there. Some people definitely have their barriers huh. I feel like I'm that person lol I have dual citizenship to NZ The UK and Ireland but I'm stuck here lol I've always thought of living in Germany or recently have also been thinking of Switzerland. That's super exciting for you!!! Moving to another country!! When will you go? Lol I can only imagine haha!!
     
  19. beccaomecca

    beccaomecca Well-Known Member

    Lol no it hasn't gotten old. I'm always lingering don't you worry haha I just don't always put my 2 cents in.
     
  20. Madeleine

    Madeleine Well-Known Member

    Oh really?! But now that your man has taken the big step of moving down under and manages to get settled it might be difficult to move yet again. Also finding work in Germany/Switzerland might not be that easy, depending what you do. But you can come and visit us. My husband is actually not afraid of moving to another country as he's done it a few times. Apparently when he imagines the distance and duration of flight from Australia back to Europe or Africa he doesn't feel up to it. He would have liked to live in the US though but that's difficult as they don't accept foreign medical degrees. So now Switzerland. Hope we can move around March/April next year.
     

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