Any of you guys a mama's boy?

I can't figure this new guy out... I mean he flat out said he called me because his mama wasn't home. I don't think he even realized what he had just said. Unbelievable.

 

I don't think I'm a mama's boy...but BM tend to hold their mama's in high esteem; more than other men it seems. You could take the roughest gang member from any of our nation's ghettos and I bet you he is the type that would jump through fire for his mom

 

I just don't know if I can handle this one. I don't want to compete with mama. Ever.

 

I'm blessed to have been raised by both of my parents. That is a rarity in the black American community these days. I have loved many a woman, but I can safely say that I have never loved another woman the same way that I love my mother. I inherited my fiery demeanor from her. Even though she only lives 80 miles from me, I still get a lump in my throat every time I leave her house. Every man should grow up to love his mom as much as I do because in doing so, you in turn learn to respect women.

But I think there is a difference between loving your moms and being a mama's boy. If you're a man and you grow up to be a mama's boy, you might end up lacking whatever it takes to stand on your own two feet during the tough times. You may end up unfairly depending on women to do what you as a man should do. And you will probably blame others for all of the problems you encounter. It is unhealthy to be a mama's boy but it is important to love your mother.

I believe that if you're serious about a girl, you should introduce her to your parents. You can learn so much about her by observing the way she gets along with your mother. A girlfriend who refuses to ever meet your parents isn't serious about you as a boyfriend or a mate. A man should be able to love his girl and his mama without creating an atmosphere of confrontation between her and his moms. There is enough love to go around without making your girl feel like she's in some kind of competition.

Peace.
________
"In the final analysis, there is no solution to man's progress but the day's honest work, the day's honest decision, the day's generous utterances, and the day's good deed."

 

It's great that you love your mom, but anyone who says that they are talking to you because mama wasn't home is just a freak. I want to tell him to get his mom to suck his dick instead of me.

 

Does this guy live with his mom? And how old is he? I'm asking because his actions are like those of a teenager in high school.

Peace.

 

He's 32 and no, he doesn't live with his momma. I don't know, he's odd. He talks like a firestorm for ten or twenty minutes, then you can't get two words out of him. He's constantly on the phone, even during dinner. It makes me crazy. I don't think this will work.

 

Yes, there is clearly a difference between loving your mother and being a mama' boy. Iffy adored his mother (who died several years ago). He has recently been given a video of the funeral in Nigeria (which he wasn't able to attend) but doesn't want to watch it without me being there.

Good Mothers teach their children good values and help them to "spread their wings" - but too many women molly coddle their children and suffocated them with love, wanting to cling on to them for as long as they can - which makes the mama's boy.

I had an ex who was a mama's boy. At 29 he still lived with his Mother and paid just £10 per week rent. She did EVERYTHING for him, including ironing his underwear. The days she said she was proud that he took after his Dad by being "big" I left.

 

I dated someone just like that, Sabinne - there's something intriguing about it at first but eventually I decided he just had ADHD :lol: so we decided to stay friends!

 

I used to be a mama's boy, but my mother blew that, it's over. If you've seen "Crash" and saw how Don Cheadle's mother treated him and who she preferred, you get the idea.

Sabinne, you can come do me, I promise Mom won't call while you're here 8)

 

He wasn't from Baltimore, was he?

 

No, and he wasn't 32 so it was a bit more forgiveable! (only 23)

 

A little. It would have been hilarious if it had been the same guy.

 

I grew up with both of my parents, a rarity in the African American community, and im not much of a mama's boy but i adore my mother so much. There's a huge difference between loving your mother and being effeminately attracted to her. If you love your mother, you can still demand freedom and assert your adult independence. If you are a mama's boy, its the reverse. The first thing a man can do to avoid being ditched for being a mama's boy is create a new relationship with his mother as an adult. If you've ever been called a mama's boy, chances are your mother is too intrusive and you need to learn how to say "no" to her. She might be a saint, but it doesn't mean that she can't be unreasonable and manipulative. Your mother already knows you love her and would do anything for her, and that is precisely the problem. She knows you can't say no.

So, once in a while, even through her tears and attempts at emotional blackmail, let your mother know how good your girlfriend is to you and how important it is that she remains part of your life.

It's okay to tell your mother when you are looking forward to that romantic weekend you have planned for you and your girlfriend. It is also okay to tell her that she doen't need to make sandwiches for the road.

This is the most important point in order to maintain a good relationship with your girlfriend: every time you cancel plans with your girlfriend for your mother, make sure you rectify the situation later on (if there is a later on).
Never let your girlfriend feel that she comes second and that essentially your mother always has the last word. If your girlfriend witnesses you giving in to your mother's unreasonable requests, make sure that she also witnesses you saying no to your mother.

If you're a mama's boy, chances are your mother will think that no other woman will ever be good enough for you. So when your mother tells you that she will not break your heart but your lover will, remember that if you love and respect both the women in your life fairly, your lover will always want to play nurse with you and your mother will never stop baking you cookies.

 

To be quite fair, I'd have to say that I'm a girl and I also adore my mum. She's a terrific woman and role model, and just hearing her voice on the phone makes me feel like a little kid again, and very loved.

 

You guys aren't getting the point--the man lets me know he'll call his mother and then me. Now, I think that wouldn't bother me if he didn't tell me, but he does. And he talks to other people while he's supposed to be spending his time with me, as if I'm not interesting enough for him. Once in awhile, okay, but constantly--I can't handle that. Maybe I'm not interesting enough for him and that's a clear sign that we're not meant to be together.

 

I do get your point - but you're looking at it the wrong way round. It's nothing to do with you or not being interesting enough, you're a plenty interesting enough girl, he just has very bad manners! And even if he likes you a lot that's a good enough reason to get rid of him!!

 

Nope, I love my mother dearly, but I am closer to my Father.

 

A man should always love his mother as that is a sign of how he will most likely treat you. When you get into relationships and start getting married...many mothers understand that they must take a step back and allow the wives/girlfriends to be the more important female influence in the man's life. My mom and I are close....we think alike and people often think we look alike. My father is deceased and I think that having a two parent family is ideal....but.....a man being raised by a woman (a strong one) can have benefits. A man can teach you how to be a man but not necessarily how to be a good man for someone else. All of my friends have their fathers but I think I understand women better than they do. I'm not a pro when it comes to ladies but I've had to grow up faster. Fathers often ride you more, but when all you have is a small woman giving orders...you tend to rely more on self-discipline as opposed to being commanded. Most women make the mistake of babying their sons and making their sons feel as if something is wrong with having only one parent. Most women don't know how to raise a man...but some are strong enough to do the job. I think men from 2-parent families are more confident when it comes to "getting their mack on" because they think like a man 100% of the time and don't really perceive how women see them nor do they care...so it is easier to approach just about any girl. Men raised by women often seem to be more self-consious of what a girl sees when she looks at him so he doesn't get as many phone numbers. The flip side is that he thinks more like a woman in certain instances so he may have a greater understanding of what a woman wants...not so much what he THINKS she wants. Once again I've launched into a long diatribe...but hey....peace out amigos!

 

That was really good. Many women don't seem to want to let go of their children, particularly their sons. And in cases like that I pity the women these men marry.