Addiction

Anybody has experiences with addicted persons (drugs, gambling,alcohol)?
What did it mean for their family? What is your opinion to handle with it? Why are some people more receptive than others?​

 

I had an uncle who drank excessively for years.

He ended up divorcing my aunt but I'm not sure if the alcoholism was the main factor.

He is a truck driver.



My father was a functional alcoholic all my childhood but he never really got out of control with it.

I remember finding empty bottles of alcohol behind the couch as a kid. He would line them up. I always found it rather peculiar but didn't probe into it much.

He was never an abusive alcoholic or anything like that but he needed to have a drink every night.

 

Yes, step dad a chronic mean alcohol addict from a very early age and it eventually killed him. Endless efforts to help him gave no results.

It means the whole family is suffering from this disease. Plenty of studies to show this. Many children from families with addiction suffer the same syndrome as kids from war.
You also learn to lie to cover the addiction in the family among other things.
I never could bring friends home because you never knew what he would do.

There are studies that show that people prone to addictive behavior (any kind) have a different biology of certain receptors in the brain. I.e., that they are genetically pre-dispositioned to this behavior, although that is not an excuse imo - people with addictive behavior ruins so much for so many people.. although I completely forgave my step-dad on his funeral..
A very releasing experience.. I lived with so much anger for so long and it all went away. I think it released my mother as well.
We choose to remember who he was when we was sober and have let go of the mean side.
May he rest in peace.

 

One of my very first boy friend was an heroine adict.
He was off the drug most of time we where toghter ( I guess it was 3 years). But he fall back from time to time. But he was also drinking a lot fo alckolhol.
His friends where rich people ( around the age 19-26) from the town ( I live in the city with largest miliionaire density of Germany).
There drug abuse was normal. Usaly cocaine and esctasy, and pot waas something normal.
He took many pills and so, but I was not realy suffering from this. Only one time he nearly killed me when I half asleep, because he made a cuboard fall on me where I sleeped, if I would not have heard him, and jumped out of my bed still beeing half asleep, I would have been dead, beacause the heaviest part of this thing fall where my head was.

I know that he did not wanted to do it, but what was terrible for me, the next day he did not remember and also he did not saw why I was so upset. I was ok so there was no problem. But I was only ok, because I woke up and moved faster then I could think.

At the end of our reltion ship he started taking the heroin again. He stopped taking care of himself and I moved out after a while.
He was the most intelligent person in my life, I never new someone with such a briliant mind. He was actualy a very sensual person, and this drug stuff, was just soo wrong.

 

Yes. One of my brothers is a drug addict. I'm the youngest in the family and my parents did what they could to keep the truth from me whilst I was growing up. But, as a teenager, I realized what was happening. He's been a drug addict for most of my life. He's addicted to cocaine and crack, and Lord knows what else by now.

He went into prison for 2 years (he was in there from '95-'97) and when he came out he was clean. Stayed clean for 7 years. Everyone in the family was so happy to have him "back". It was the best. Then he moved to FL for his job and within a month, he was back on drugs and burned through the $40K he had saved. My two sisters and I went down there to try to help him. He didn't want it. That was in January of 2005. Since then, he's been in and out of jail there, homeless, living with "friends", getting arrested for burglary, etc. He was re-arrested in July and while he usually only spends a few days in jail, he is still there because his bond is now at $20K. I'm happy he's still in jail. My mom is not. I said, at least you know where he is now.

Our only "contact" with him is checking out the sheriff's website to see when he's been arrested again and to see his mugshot. Fun times!!

The addiction has affected my entire family. I have never touched drugs because I don't want something to have that kind of control over me. I drink alcohol but have never had so much to drink that I can't remember what happened the night before. I have this "switch" in my brain that doesn't allow me to ever lose control of my drinking. Growing up and watching what my brother did to the family (stealing money, cars, anything he could pawn) was enough for me to never want to lose control while under the influence of alcohol. I don't ever want to be like him.

I remember as a teenager, going into one of our bathrooms and seeing splatters of blood all over the walls because he didn't know how to "shoot up" properly. And I would clean it up so my mom wouldn't see. I did that more than once.

I honestly can't believe that he's still alive. After the neighborhoods he's frequented, and how he'd be homeless and the various jails and prisons he's been in, sharing needles and such. I always "joke" about his guardian angels and how they'll need a vacation after he finally does pass away, because they're doing a fantastic job of keeping him fairly healthy (no HIV or anything like that).

It truly amazes me that he's 48 now. I thought he would have been dead by now.

Addiction is a horrible thing. But the one thing I have learned from this experience is that if someone doesn't want to get help, there is absolutely nothing you can do to help them or convince them that they need help.

Addiction is a horrible thing.

 

there is also something like Co-dependence, a good point too.
Something to think about for people who have addicted people in thier life.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codependence

 

To be honest, I don´t even know, where to start. It seems that the whole switzerland is infected. You see them on the street, you hear from all sides about drug addicted family members of all social classes. When I was 25 I got to know somebody who was addicted of cocain. The first reaction always is to try to help, till you have to understand that a "normal" person is not able to do anything. Stealing money, emergency calls in the middle of the nights..even my phone was recorded and interviews by police just because of him. For sure he was in jail short time later, but the system here allows that you can exchange your jail time into a clinic stay to get clean. I cannot say he is clean, but he is able to handle with it. He runs his business, is a family father, now.

I know a couple, both where addicted with heroin..When you see her, I sware you she looks like an angle and her charisma is the same. Their drug career started, when they were around 15 yrs. Their parents brought them to a farm in Spain. The major point was to learn disciplin. They both say it was a very hard time, but they are married now, both have their jobs, he is leading a company. But both are sick because of hepatitis C.

The cousin of my ex-husband died last year of heroin, he was 17.We wanted to bring him to Africa, but it was already to late.

The sun of a former girl-friend died with 14yrs, the youngest drug victim in Zürich.

 

Some pretty unsettling and saddening accounts there, Books/Chris/Nouharel, my best wishes to you.

I have suspected for a while that most people who have ever taken Alcohol are, actually, very mildly addicted to it. Amongst drinkers who aren't alcoholics, the regularity of its usage, and the strength in feeling it is missing when it is absent, are simply too consistent with addiction to be attributed to "It's just because it tastes so good!".

I think the reason for it's popularity amongst the population at large is simply that it's immediate effects are benign. In western societies we have reached a peaceful, though controversial status quo with it, one that nobody has the will to disturb.

The reason it isn't widely seen to be an addictive substance, as with Tobacco, is simply because it has been so well integrated into our lifestyles, and the reason it isn't banned is that, again like tobacco, it simply raises too much revenue. I believe if Alcohol had been discovered last year, it would have been prohibited.

Finally, I think the reason that nobody acknowledges that it is far more widely (though usually not deeply) addictive is that it is the conclusion of research that should have been done decades ago - and possibly was.

All my own opinions, of course. Btw, I myself am a drinker.

 

my mother was an alcoholic...she died when i was 25 yrs old...never knew if she was going to be a fun drunk or a mean drunk it was always a toss up...never had friends over...i was too embarrassed...i started drinking in 9th grade and pretty much drank all the way through high school and college...it wasn't a pretty sight...i drank to just escape from everything...i do have a drink now and then but it just doesn't taste good to me anymore...i don't like feeling out of control...1-2 is my limit...i don't keep alcohol in my house...

 

I grew up in a home where there was no substance abuse, not even alcohol. But living on the poor side of town, I saw plenty. Most other kids fell into two categories of addicts; the huffers (paint sniffers) or the junkies (heroine addicts).

I do remember spending christmas eve night over a girlfriends and when we woke up in the morning, her alcoholic grandfather had passed out on the christmas tree and just pissed all over himself and the presents. It was such an odd thing for me and they acted like it was normal.

Now today, all my family (brothers and sister) are addicts or drunks. All but me. I have seen my sister staggering home from the bar 8 months pregnant. My mom gives me a run down on all the disfunction when I call.

I got no use for drunks or addicts in general. Never dated one because I am so not an enabler.

 

Well in our house, the only drug was cigarets, and my mother gets all mad when she talks about alcohol.

U cannot drink a beer close to her, because u get bulshit talk for the next three weeks.

But when my brother smokes pot in front her, there is nothing, she even don´t know what it is.....

What so ever, I guess it is neccessary to get a somehow working releation to drugs.
Drugs are used every where, so it is neccessary to learn how to deal with them and just preaching absitnece don´t work.
My brothers and me whe have a drug history in our lives. I was into pot way to much and for a while I was scared to get adicted to alcohol. My brothers realy fucked up thiers teen days with pot and other stuff, and one of my brothers got into hopital for months because he took something what is causing haluzinations. Even years from that time he is having heavy flash backs wich totaly throw him out of his normal life.

I don´t know how to deal with drugs when I will maybe have children, but maybe I will them allow to drink something for spezial occastion like new year or chrismas. So they won´t have all this load to try it is soooo badly. Sure it would not mean to make them drunk, just letting them have a sip so they at least know how it taste.
I know from other cultres like in Nepal, that they use drugs for special occastions. There is one festival, where it is leagal to get high with pot, so people have fun. I don´t know if there is a lot of pot abuse in the Nepali society, but at least those people I know, they don´t smoke it normaly and it also don´t seem to be in the youth culture soo known.
On the other side in Bangladesh where alcohol is forbidden and pot too, I saw more people smoking pot then in Nepal.

 

Nouharel: is alcohol addiction a problem in Germany? I saw a lot of drinking in Germany especially on Octoberfest but very little public display of drunkenness. Flygirl: I believe alcohol addiction is higher in poor communities than elsewhere because the people there feel they have no future.

I have no relatives that are addicted but I know people who are addicted to alcohol and they seem to be unsure of what they want to do with their lives. They are also quite capable of saying or doing anything to get that alcohol. As a result I find it hard to trust them especially those in denial of the addiction. Some of them can be mean when drunk and very nice when sober.

 

Wow, take your pick. Alcohol, gambling, drugs man I seen it all.
So many stories. I learned how to handle it with tough love from
my experience, they want to live in hell, show them where they are living.
Show them that your hand is only reachable if their hand is.

 

Yes alsohol is a problem.
Latly it is a problem with teens who drink them self to half death. In Germany u can start drinking officaly beer or wine at a age of 16 and harder alcohol from the age of 18.
This is leading into some trouble, some teens get drunk at an very early age nearly weekly.
Germany has many drug problems and I consider alkohol being a drug even when it is legal.
I don´t think that alcohol is a problem of the poorer classes only. Actualy in Germany the rich people all are in Kokaine, what poorer people simply cannot affort.
U will see rich people using diffrent drugs, and they have the money to hide that too. while poor people use cheaper drugs wich have more impact to thier healt.

Just look at young rich people in the states like Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan....

 

My friend is an alcoholic. He doesn't do shit with his life. He finally went back to school this semester, after 2 years, but he wants to go the easy route, and get some bullshit ass certificate. He's down to get drunk EVERY DAY, almost, and smokes hella weed now, with our other friend.

Me and my friends sort of have this ongoing joke that we bring up from time to time, about how many beers he considers a FEW. One time, him and two of our other friends were hanging with him, and my friends were like, "you wanna get a few beers, and kick back?" And our friend says "Yeah, let's get a 30 pack". They were like "what the fuck? We're aren't playing beer pong, man". So that's a little ongoing joke we keep going cause we found it hella funny.

Another joke we have is about when we were telling our same friend that we needed to find a liqour store that was still open, because they were down to drink, and you could hear our friend on the other end of the phone just light up with joy, and say "yeah, yeah, I'll find some places". Then we called him like a hour later and told him that we weren't drinking anymore, that night, and you could hear the disappointment in his voice. We couldn't help but laugh.

Our other friend, who smokes with our alcoholic friend smokes all day every day, thanks to his girlfriend. She's cool, but DAMMIT WOMAN!!!! Don't mind fuck our friend. She basically forced him to do E and smoke, and now he's a hardcore weedhead. Damn pussywhip mofo. He needs to break up with her. Only reason she stays with him is because she needs a place to stay. Him and our drunk friend seriously invented like 5 smoking devices over the summer. They were badass inventions, though.

My other friends who used to drink and party, a lot, cut back on that shit, a lot. Some of my friends don't even drink hard alcohol, anymore. They just fuck with regular beer, and not that many, usually.

One of my uncles used to have it BAD with drugs, but he got cleaned up and went to school , and became a dental assistant, or something, so that's god. He had a stroke this month, though. Now he can't walk n' shit.

And I think my mom drinks with her pills. She must be, because she kills bottles of Arbor Mist n' other shit, for days. But I don't really pay attention.

Don't know if my cousin is an alcoholic, but his irresponsible ass likes to drive drunk, and flipped his car last week, and bailed, because he was drunk.