A night out - some observations

remember the saying...Truth Hurts



Not everyone has the balls to "call it as they see it," for fear they'll get back-handed or whatever...

maybe it's the way you deliver "your truth," that offends people so much...

plus you're on a board, full of angry womenz, so.........

 

My ex called me yesterday and told me about a white girl he met and that he's not as into her as she is into him. He said he was h***ny, hasn't had anyone in a while, and he was really tempted to go see her, but his conscience was messing with him because he knew he didn't want to take it any further with her. The moral of the story I guess is: some men (whose conscience won't get in the way) will hook up with any chick who'll give them some, and the fewer problems with her, the better. Men of any race.

 

Eesh! Good luck with that one, mate!

Malikom - I agree...
It's something I've noticed, which is particular to the BM/WW dating scene, and I thought I'd just drop some comments down about it...

To observe something and comment on it - I can't see the problem. I don't know how I can nicely say that these women/girls are not an overly good choice...I don't think there's a nice way to say it...
I wouldn't call them bottom of the barrel...but most people wouldn't walk past and turn their heads...
And I'm not just talking about appearance here - it's personality and education, motivation, etc also...

Anyway...
people look, people think, that's human nature. As long as thoughts don't manifest into changed actions..what does it matter? I doubt that there's anyone on this board who hasn't at least once looked at someone and thought something negative about them, or formed a stereotype in their own mind. the problem is when those thoughts inform actions (in any way - good or bad), not in thinking these things.

According to my bf, the place where I went wrong in my observation, is thinking the guys are decent....since I don't speak to them that much....I can't really tell...but apparently they're not that great themselves.

I just don't understand why I haven't met ANYONE (and I mean ANYONE) that I feel is similar to me (in that whole scene). Black, white, purple, green...no-one.

I definitely think it's me...I'm just way too old (in my brain) and way too boring for the scene..simple. And they all probably think that about me, and wonder why my bf is dating me....that's life...

Ronja.
Thanks for your considered response.
Actually, there's only one family group here that I know of ...and nearly no-one knows each other from back home - I was surprised, I would have assumed the same as you.
I understand why the girls don't date wm and why some (a few) guys are dating ww...I just thought I'd add that in to give a more complete picture of the group. The girls have to keep their reputations! the boys are building theres...

 

Ok, let's do that. Then we have to, for the arguments sake, say you are right *sigh*

First of all, realize that every human on this planet have certain "assets" that make them attractive to others. It can be looks, money, education, etc etc. What one person finds attractive, might not be what another person finds attractive though- we all got different taste and different values. But some things are usually considered "good" or "bad" by everyone.
That shouldn't be so hard to agree on, right?

Ok, let me tell you a not too hidden secret. African-American men have an EXTREMELY poor reputation. Everyone knows that statistically, if you're an African-American man, you're probably unemployed, poor, got low education and you've got a criminal record. Statistically, African-American men are total loosers. (We're not going into reasons for this, that's very off-topic. Let's just be truthful enough to admit, that's how reality is.)

So you've got this huge bunch of unemployed, uneducated, poor, criminal men... Who's doing much worse in your society than any other group is. Including your own women. What do you think an average member of a group like that has to offer?

Honestly, even if he happen to have good looks, he probably got so little "assets" left, that he'll have to accept someone with little "assets" himself. So, he can settle for a "wigger" who herself is pretty (but uneducated, criminal and unemployed) or he can find a "normal" woman- who happen to be not so pretty.

Statistically, a huge number of African-American men you see, will truly be BOTB. And not just exterior-wise. Of course they'll end up with BOTB-women. No matter which colour they pick from.

How many successful BM do you see with BOTB-WW? There are members here who are doctors, and/or got phd's. Do you think they got BOTB-women? Not bloody likely...

If you pull your pants up, get an education, and stop dealing for a living, you'll have an easier time getting a quality woman too. It's as simple as that...

Anyway, as you have pointed out on several occasions, WW are attracted to ugly guys. You know, the ones black women, Asian women, and Latino women don't want. So I don't even understand your problem any more. Your complaint is that BM who are so ugly that they can't find any other women, start dating ugly white women?

Sorry, that any ugly man have a hard time getting a "bangin' chick" (especially when he's uneducated, criminal and poor), shouldn't really be a huge surprise. I don't even understand why you think this is just a black problem. I promise you, even an ugly WHITE man, will tell you he has a hard time finding a "bangin' chick".

 

Good observation Ronja, but you also got a lot of college educated black men out there also, I can see that you making these generalizations to try and make malikom upset. I can speak on American blacks because I am from here and I personally know that not all black men are doing bad and are dealing drugs some might be but not all. Now let's get back on topic with the dating, I will admit I have seen some brothers out there with some bangers but the majority that I have observed are with obese chicks I won't call them bottom of the barrel but I will say that they won't get a twice over from a lot of folks.

 

(I was going to co-sign on Ronja's first statement, but as I contined to read I realized that I would be co-signing my ass off...so...)

Malikom...Ive said it once and Ill say it again...youre an idiot. End of discussion.

FEHG, I dont know why someone else's dating preference bothers you. One thing Ive observed in life is that unhappy people are bothered when they see other people who appear to be happy. People who are happy and "in love" love to see others who are happy. Draw your own conclusion about yourself.

And to expound Ronja's example, lets use you as example since your personally bothered by the ww/bm dating in "Zim." You date black men. Now there are alot of white men who would say that you date black men (which are considered by white men to be "bottom of the barrel-I HATE THAT PHRASE!) because you cant land a decent white guy. Maybe white guys look at you as a BOTB (UGH!) white woman and wouldnt touch you with a 10 foot pole?

Whats wrong with you that you cant keep a decent looking white guy? Are you an ugly, unattractive ww? Or are you a "good looking" ww but so emotionally and psychologically screwed up that white guys cut you loose as soon as you open your mouth? Or are you bad in the sack and white guys keep dumping you after that first night of truly terrible sex? I mean, come on, there's got to be something wrong with you because no ww in her right mind would really be attracted to a black guy?

So before we analyze and fix the ww/bm dating in "ZIm," lets fix you first so that you can date a nice white guy and stop scraping the BOTB ( :smt078) by dating black guys.

(I can already hear Lucifer in the background sharpening his knives...)

 

all i got to say is....WOW...

I didn't know our rep was "extremely" poor...

ty for bringing some honesty to the boards

:roll:

 

Sorry, not trying to upset Malikom. Malikom asked for an explanation to the phenomenon, I'm trying to give it to him. Sort of figured out that it doesn't look like we're going to be considerate with each other on this board any more, so why bother wrapping it in...
(Also, for the record, the majority on men on this board seems very lovely. But, to be honest, I somewhat doubt that the men here are representative for the average African-American male...)

I didn't say ALL African-American men are BOTB, I said the majority. Just like you're not saying ALL their women are fat, only the majority. Statistically, we're both right on! Most Americans, no matter which gender or colour, are fat.

It's actually quite interesting situation you're in to be honest. African-American men are doing so poorly, you've managed to get what's probably the worst reputation on this planet. (Sorry, you do. People do pity you though. Like they pity anyone who's poor and oppressed.)In most countries, what you see is that immigrants statistically are doing worse than the rest of the population. That makes sense, since they come without much- all they got usually fits in their heads and a suitcase. For the black population in US however, it's the opposite. Africans, and their children, are doing WAY better than the "natives"... Looking at it from the outside, it's quite fascinating...

Oh well, back on topic...

So, your saying the couples you've SEEN got fat women- what do you know about those men, other than they're BM? Do you know anything about their educational background, socio-economic status etc? Do you know anything about the women? No you don't. You can't. Cause you've only SEEN them. How about talking about people you know in stead? How many decent BM do you know, who end up with BOTB-women? And how many truly successful BM do you know, who end up with BOTB-women?

Anyway, as I said, the majority of Americans are fat. That means that the huge majority of ANY couple, will have at least one fat person. Why would black/white-couples be any different?

 

I agree. But let's face it, it's here to stay. And we just hate sugar-coating things, don't we? :lol:

Hey, I don't want to take the honour for someone else's work. Send your thanks to Malikom and his likes...

 

LOL @ Ronja taking it all personal. If you're not bottom of the barrel then why should you care? :lol:

 

Why should the world pity African American men, hell most of the world is trying to be like us, I can't count the times that folks in general have told me you got Africans fronting like they are from NYC when they are in Europe just to rope some chicks. I think African Americans are doing quite good here, now if you watch the news of course they are going to throw up a black face it is ratings. I have nothing against my African brothers success here in America and wish them well,but not all of them are doing better than the natives that is a statement to get black people world wide divided. You also have more poor white people and more white folks on welfare and also on drugs I think the world should pity them, as for myself and my family we are doing fine. Hell if anything Africans get shit on more than anybody else, I have a friend here who says that if Africa is so ok and they are doing so much better than the AA here then why are they not returning to their countries to help it out.(his words not mine) Oh and I don't need anybodies pity.

 

yeah...i was reading a "struck a chord," vibe from ronja's post..

malik must have gotten under her skin...

which could have been his intention..who knows

 

I'm not taking it personal. Why would I? I'm not even American...

But I find it really offensive to use that kind of lingo Malikom is using. He shows NO respect for other human beings.

I can usually like something in everyone, or if I can't, I can usually find an excuse to why they are ass-holes. Sadly, Malikom just seem to be rude and shallow.

 

Hey, don't shoot the messenger...

And I never said Africa is OK. I said Africans in the US are doing very OK. Don't turn this into a debate on Africa btw. We're here to talk about why you people only get fat chicks...

 

Both of you are full of it... why is it that Ronja's post is an indication of having taken something to personal yet Malikom has carte blanche in the ignorance dept? They both beat around the same bush (more or less sugar coated) yet Ronjas post must be because she took it personal WTF?
And Karma allow me to post your question to the person it also belongs to.
Malikom, if you are not BOTB why do you care so much?

 

He's not turning this into a debate about africa..he's responding to what you commented about African Americans, in general, and our oh so bad reputation.

 

BTW, how about some REAL input, rather than silly personal attacks? I can easily turn it around, and say that "Well, If you're offended by being called a looser you probably are..."

So, does any of you have a better explanation to why you mostly date fat women?
In short, my two explanations are
1. Your socio-economic status
2. Most Americans are fat

 

oh boy...

 

He said:

Now, let's not start debating that... I sense enough hate here already...
:lol:

 

The majority of his post was about african americans, which is what I'm going off about...

you just want to focus on Africa