spank your child or not to spank?

Damn

 

I was beaten as a kid. SaintinAugusta, I read your post and could relate to a lot of it *hugs*. All of the things in the study are true and I've seen them work out in real life.

I grew up and attended a small school system in a middle to upper class town and could tell you first hand the majority of kids I knew who were spanked/beaten didn't end up any where near as successful as the kids who weren't. I was of the lucky few to thrive despite my upbringing.

I've had a couple ex bf's who are pro-spanking and would turn it into a black/white thing. You know, white people are "soft" and they don't spank their kids. Riiight. Because no one wants to work in a school full of empowered white kids whose parents don't spank them.

Hitting your kids doesn't make you a better parent, it just shows everyone else how ignorant you are and that you do not have the emotional maturity to handle parenting. I do not understand how hitting a child on his or her bare bottom is still not considered sexual abuse.

Sorry if the truth hurts but I've lived through it. You can get locked up for hitting a dog or a perfect stranger but too many people promote striking the small, developing children they've bore. Most folks don't deserve the miracle of parenthood.

 

I spank my kids and will continue to spank them if they misbehave.

 

You make some great points. I think, like Ches pointed out, a quick little SPONTANEOUS smack on a bottom (CLOTHED!) is fine for misbehaving young children ONLY.

It is these calculated 'event's of giving a spanking to child that is abhorrent to me.

One, you terrify a child in anticipation (how the hell do you make a child go find a switch to use on them -- I hear that happens a lot!)
and two, the whole "now come here and lay across my knees" or "now pull your pants down" -- or worse the grabbing of your begging child and forcing them across you -- is seriously disturbing to say and do to any child. I know when I would raise my voice to my dog, how it would shake or cower. It KNEW, and that was enough for me. Same with a child.

You remember. You can recall your beatings at the drop of a hat and no matter how many years have passed into adulthood, it's not a nostalgic memory. I wasn't spanked by parents but my oldest brother had an anger issue and hit me as a child. A small child cannot fight back.

 

Some kids need spankings, some don't

If a kid is ignoring you and still acting like everything is sweet, what else do you do? I was always afraid of my parents and was deathly loyal and respectful. They didn't play that stink eye or sucking teeth at them shit...that would elicit physical punishment

Bottom line tho is that everyone responds differently...if there was one true way to raise a child, no one would turn out to be a bully, dropout or jailbird slacker

 

That's that throwback shit.

My mom used a belt or her hand. My grandma had "the backscratcher". When my cousin and I used to act up, my grandma would go get her backscratcher, puttin' the fear in our asses.

 

let a mothafucka roll their eyes at grandmom...

shiiiiiiiiiit

 

That'll get you what we like to call "popped in the fuckin' mouth", followed by a "quit that damn crying or I'll give you something to cry about".

Grandma ain't playin'.

 

i miss those days

mothafuckas would run when spankings were coming

house full of boys too...u knew someone was going to get hemmed up

 

They don't make grandma like they used to.....probably because half of them are 48 years old these days. :smt011

Get em' granny.

 

lol boy you aint NO good

 

you aint NEVA lied!

someone gonna get murk'd

 

Mama need to get up in their bad asses before it too late...

 

Ma older brother visited home with his family from America and they were living with me. One time his son who is 14, was rude and was talking back at him and i told him to stop it or i would give him a whupping he decided to talk back at me, i went to my room brought out a cane and dared him to talk back just one more time. My brother's wife had a horrified look on her face, but i could see my brother was kinda happy though he kept a straight face. My nephew sulked and went to sit down quietly. Our father was a disciplinarian and whupped us if we mishehaved and when he died, my brother who is 9 years older than me, took over the whupping duties. He has become all soft now and i dont blame him since the wife wont let him discipline the kids.

 

did not read what everyone said but nothing wrong with a little spank
as long you know what you doing and not with anger

I did spank my son when was young
I believe if you do that need to be done at very young age when they start walking and be naughty
example when my son started to crawl and stand a little too ..he started to go and knock everything from the table and yes i spank him then...was mostly a little touch at his bottom while wearing nappies.. didn't even hurt him but he will scream because i was not letting him do what he wanted .. only had to do that few times and you know what he never ever done this again never wrote on walls either like some other kids never took anything out of the kitchen either... i didn't had to lock the kitchen or bathroom because i will be scared he will hurt himself
we could go and eat out and not run and scream on the restaurant
he will pick his toys when finish playing few times will not do that and i did put all in the bin next time he knew lol
yes i was strict a lot but you need too
so little spank will not hurt the child need to know that can not do what they want without consequences in life

 

Oh wow, a belt... I couldn't take a belt to a child . Ever.

See, and I always thought Grandma is who you run to when mamma got mad. :smt022
Grandmas are supposed to spoil the little grandkids. Y'all must've been some badassess, huh?

 

my grandmother used to go me with a ping pong paddle