What are the advantages of being a Black man.

WM do not have a gender bond with BM in the work-place or society.

As mentioned earlier...WM would much rather have a BW around him than a BM.

WM see us as enemies and competition...not friends or allies.

 

:smt038

 

:smt011 man, what stuff are you on? There are plenty of WM that don't see it like that. I hear plenty of White guys make comments of choosing Barack because he is a man over a woman. For the longest amount of time, the military has wanted men of all color over women. Heck, some think women should not be in the military at all.

 

Not really, I live in a small town in eastern ky and I have plenty of wm friends, former professors, etc. who regardless of political views have proved more than time and time again that they value my friendship as well. If anything, there have been many times when my foot has gone sideways into my mouth because I ASSUMED the worst, only to be proven wrong. My years here have taught me more and more that people need room to be people, sure there are some who have made mistakes doused in prejudice and racism, but I do believe we shouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions and assume almost everyone, in particular every non-black anglo-saxon male is ready to string us up from a tree or make life a living hell for us. In this day and age your average person generally has more things to worry about then wondering what the Cosby's are doing moving in across the street from them.

I've been working steadily on my master's degree and have only been out of my undergrad career for a little over a year, after talking with some of my former professors they are wanting to work me into their second semester (starting in Jan) at my former university onto their teaching staff, as a non-official professor/adjunct teacher. Yes, every professor over at the university is white and it is a private university so there probably isn't any pressure to have to meet a quota or number of diversity employees, but with that said I'm certain that if they felt the way that you suggest, then they would have turned a deaf ear to me long ago. Especially having not completed my master's degree yet.

Or some few years ago when I had an internship fall through and had to do one on campus for the summer, the dean of the school let me stay in one of the apartments, rent free for the summer with cable, air conditioning and the works, all of it for free. And yes, he's a white guy.

Way back when in my second year of studying there, I started dating a girl who's father worked there. Well, he and her mom had a problem that she was dating me a black guy and eventually it put a strain on our relationship and we ended it. Being a small university, word got around about the cause of that strain, next thing I know these same white male professors and staff members were coming down hard on their fellow white male co-worker on my behalf. Now, time has passed, I've moved on, forgiven and that all jazz. Myself and the girl's father actually talk from time to time and catch up. He even went so far as to talk to me about the whole thing and apologize. Sure he might have felt an incentive as he didn't want his name to be ran through the mud by the situation, but overall I do believe he's a good guy with a big heart who was just raised with some mis-guided beliefs and worries about cultural differences and I like to think he learned to work on changing his ways too.

I know there have been many wrongs done in the past and present by people who dislike and go so far as to hate people who look different from them. But I like to agree with the old saying that two wrongs don't make a right. And we have to leave room to forgive and truly be the bigger person if the other person(s) show an inability to do so. I'm not saying go into situations blindly as though the world is a big rainbow of love where everyone gets along, but rather not judge and be close-minded to a group of people in response to a few or even collectively many, who have trespassed against us. It's hard, I know, I can certainly share some stories, but I think about this site that we're on now. White womenBlack men.com The same white men that we may develop disdain, dislike or bad stereotypes about are the same white men who had a part in bringing into the world the white women we are open to loving, developing relationships with and even marrying. So to assume right off the bat that your love interest, girlfriend or even wife's father (or some stranger that happens to be a white guy) is a horrible person who has it out for us just because he is a white male...well that is just as bad as someone assuming the same thing about us just because we are black.

I had been wronged in almost the ultimate way when it comes to interracial relationships. The parent's disapproving, but that was a totally different relationship with totally different people. Sure, it hurt and it even left a nice little scar, but this woman I have been with the past two years and HER FAMILY have definately helped heal those wounds. If anything, I have to pinch myself sometimes because it feels like a dream, just how nice they are to me. Just how much that are willing and ready to invite me into their family. If they are just putting on an act then I have a whole lot of Oscars to hand out. It has even been her parents who have brought up marriage between us, they let us know they have money set aside to give for our wedding and such as they(mother and FATHER) encourage our relationship every step of the way.

If this thread is made to reinforce the cultural strengths of us as black men, then I'm all for it, but if this is made to act as though we ourselves believe we are no good, that the world thinks we're no good, that all white men are out to get us, and now we're trying to scrape the bottom of the barrel to find some good in ourselves, then I must respectfully disagree with its purpose. I consider myself a follower of Christ above all else, who knows his identity doesn't rely on what society says he is, whether it is white society or black society. Yeah, life is hard, I've had my ups and downs and I don't have everything figured out, I've been wronged by white, black, asian people and some I can't even identify lol...but to assume everyone that looks like them are all against me because of those who have wronged me, then I might as well live in a world all by myself and last time I checked the world's population is going more than a couple billion strong.

Oh yeah, sorry for the length of the post, this is just an issue I've struggled with in the past, so it is one of those things that sends me off on a long rant... lol..

 

Have you heard of self-fulfilling prophecy? If you have low self-regard then others are likely to join you in that assessment.

 

LOL. I know what you are saying. I elaborated in the thread that when it comes to the justice system and getting hired....it roll as such.

BW are a 2 for 1 deal in the hiring scheme. when it comes to getting justice or if you are in the defense you are gonna catch hell

 

:smt038

I'm just a white woman, and Australian to boot, so what do I know? But this is what was going through my head as I read some of this defeatist stuff....

 

FFS... Next time just send a virus, or an e-bomb, or a Denial of Service Attack. Good Grief...

 

You're one tripping.

WM would rather have a sister in the workplace than a Brother.

Fuck what you heard them say about Obama.

 

I didn't say all WM are out to get us...but to act like BM are second in America's hierarchy is retarded.

 

Uhh...okay?

 

Neither my parents, grandparents, nor anyone else in my ancestry - sacrificed or endured hardship so that I can be called Second Best. Many of you seem to be proud of being second class citizens. And in this regard, you will never be your own bosses. You will always be someone's employee - forever victimized by the prejudice of others. As an African-American professional, I am proud to be involved in the self-sustainability of my community. If you are not an entrepreneur, you will get crumbs. If you are not involved in local government you will be powerless...

 

Your sarcasm makes it appear as if you're attacking the person who posted instead of the idea in the post itself. You did that to me as well. You make good points, so stop trying to make an ass out of people.

 

I meant no harm. It's just the longest post I've ever seen in this forum...

 

Ah, okay. Yeah, I didn't mean to make it that long honestly, its just besides a few choice friends and some family members, I don't get to converse much about these kinds of things, so when I post about something on a thread it is almost like a dump truck dropping a load.

 

Unfortunately, my own corporate experience has shown that for every laid back and progressive white guy you encounter, there are about 20 more that scare the shit out of that lone cool white guy - rendering him almost ineffective...