Patience and Restraint

I didn't know what else to call this so I went with my emotions at the time. Feel like I would come in here and share with the people my feelings as of late.

I had a situation where I was pumping gas and while I went into the gas station a guy decided he would squeeze his car in between a lil pathway between my car and the curb. I saw it while paying but ive seen this before and tho it annoys me theres nothing I can do.

I come out to see a black mark along the passenger side of the vehicle. My first response was amazement, then anger. It was raining so tho I was mad I figured it could wipe away...which it did. As I pump the gas I stare at the guy and so many thoughts ran through my mind. The man looks at me, he knows what he has done but doesn't say anything.

I look at his car, it pretty old and beat up. This guy has his elderly mother or lady in the front seat. I look at him and tho I cannot be sure it does not look as if he was in the best financial state. I want to whoop this guys ass. He sees me knows I'm pissed but never apologizes.

I'm a thinker and I'm not a confrontation type of person. Growing up partially in the hood we learn to fight once we see a situation as disrespect. But I don't live in the hood anymore, haven't for many years. I'm grown now, 38 years of age with a career in the federal government. I have my uniform on, with a cover shirt and theres many people around with cell phones so I'm sure if I attack this person I will be the bad guy.

So I decided to wipe the mark off, take my loss and go home. The mark came off but a few days later I see a slight dent. This annoyed me as it happened a few days ago coming home from work. I felt I should have confronted him but I know I have very lil patience with zero accountability.

I don't see him apologizing nor fessing up to this as he didn't when he saw me looking at him. Not sure if I handled this correctly, and I'm actually a lil annoyed with myself that I didn't. I'm not afraid of criticism and I understand I'm not perfect. What would you have done? I've gotten into it with people in public before. You don't necessary "win", you just look foolish. Tho I feel like a culture of brainless people with no regard to their fellow citizens are growing. I appreciate if you read and shared your thoughts.

 

Right thing? Tbh I don’t know. Godly thing? Yup
I’m not religious but I can’t think of a different word. Bc good things ought to be coming to you if there is a god
I know I’m sending my good vibes your way

 

You did what you had to do. If it had ended up any other way than it did I can guarantee you that you would not look as favorable as you would simply by walking away.

This could have easily been a "When Keeping it Real Goes Wrong" type of moment and we've all seen how those scenarios play out.

Pride is a muthafucka though.

 

Much appreciated. Thanks this was needed.

 

Definitely lol. I don't want that at all lmao.

 

In circumstances where this has happened to me (twice), l've negotiated on the spot cash from them for minor damages they caused.

One was a side scratch as she was pulling out and took too close a turn, another was a guy who bumped me solid while backing up in a spot behind me.

Can you toilet plunger the dent out?

 

It's not that deep. Mainly had left a mark but maybe I could.

 

Disclaimer: I do not live in the US, so social and legal ramifications could be different.

If my car gets a dent and I know who did it I’d confront the person verbally, as in „Excuse me, I think you just touched my car, look it’s not just dirt, it’s not coming off bla bla.“ Socially it would be expected of the person to admit, apologise and discuss how he will fix it. If he proves stubborn I’d peacefully take his number plate. Then I’ll follow it up through police and insurance and he can kindly continue his stubbornness with those authorities.
I understand your anger but not the urge to fight it out but then I’m neither a man nor did I grow up in the hood. Compromising your job over it isn’t worth it.

 

You did the right thing. That guy had nothing to lose In a confrontation but you did...your job. Don`t bring yourself down to anyone`s level.