should you get therapy and why blacks dont go?

That's not that the purpose of therapy.

This!

That!

I think if more black men were open and forthcoming about attending therapy, more blacks will open up to it and the stigma of feeling "crazy" will go away and less blacks will look down on it as weak or something is wrong with them.

Study of Holocaust survivors finds trauma passed on to children's genes

http://www.theguardian.com/science/...ors-finds-trauma-passed-on-to-childrens-genes

I see more clearly now why some blacks act out in such extreme ways amongst each other now. Hundreds of years of no professional help.

 

Says you. You don't get to dictate why people go or what they're supposed to get out of it. Therapy is a very personal journey so your personal experience/opinion can vary significantly from others.

 

Interesting. No one ever seems to be 100% happy with their body. I can certainly see what you are saying.

Most of my time living in the NC mountains, (when my life literally revolved around the gym) I worked out with the lady I was dating but I ran with another lady who was a platonic friend. The lady I used to run with was a marathon runner, but she would run 10k's with me. She was a former swimmer and in terrific condition. Everyone loved her slim muscular legs, but I found out she was actually trying to shrink them by denying herself carbs after a run. That's a sure way to burn muscle, I don't ever recommend anyone to do that. It's not the healthiest idea.

Her legs were perfect, but of course she didn't see it that way.

The lady I was dating at the time had a great body too but she was never happy with her booty.

The fellas always talked about bulking or cutting like they always do. No one says that they are 100% content with their body.

 

No doubt

 

So you went into therapy expecting these people to tell you you something about yourself you didn't know? I feel this is why people fail before they start. Actually a better question would be what was your expectations of therapy?

True.

 

One thing people underestimate is that you (not you personally, Rita) can't always trust your thoughts. Your mind can and does play tricks on you. It's normal to think you know yourself best, but sometimes a person needs an objective professionals view of themselves from a therapist who is there to guide the self-actualization.Sometimes it takes a repeated effort of discussion when suddenly the light bulb might go off.

Also, therapists aren't mind readers. If a patient feels it's not working, they can find/ask for a different one, or let the therapist know, who might take an alternate path in guidance.

 

I have some anxiety issues. My Doctor taught me about distraction therapy. I thought it was a bunch of B.S. at first, but it actually works.

 

What is that. (I could Google it).
Best advice l ever got was to relax, breathe into bag and tell yourself it's not real, its all in your mind, you can control your mind. That came from my boyfriend's southern grandma. :smt001
It actually works.

 

I stay away from therapists because of the cost. I don't like the idea of paying someone to tell me how fucked up I am. I imagine that's how other bm and bw see it too maybe

 

It's really simple, when the anxious thoughts start creeping in, you literally distract yourself with something else. I use math puzzles.

 

I go to a counselor when I can. The trouble is finding one that I can feel comfortable with and have a good rapport with. I feel that it is better this way because a pastor can only related to you in a limited way. I once had an informal meeting with a young pastor. Lucky for me, he was a cool guy and I could swear in front of him and it didn't bother him. I go to counselling to talk to someone who would listen to me and understand what I am saying, to read my frequency when the rest of the world cannot. There is no shame in seeing a qualified counselor.

 

Agreed! Luckily, I can usually work out my issues on my own. However, when I separated from my ex-wife, I decided to seek counseling just to hear from an objective person. After about 4 sessions she said that she thought I was doing well coping with the impending divorce. She did tell me that if ever I felt a need to talk more, she'd be happy to resume the sessions.

I can agree. I think it's part of that whole thing in which we must be strong, and never appear weak. Also, I'm sure the stigma of seeing a therapist is also a factor.

Agreed! I didn't feel like I needed therapy either. I was glad when my therapist said the same, but I appreciate having that resource if I needed it.

Yup! Many times when something has been heavily on my mind, and/or I've been under stress. Excercise has help me de-stress.

I've heard that it can be tough at times finding a therapist who's a good fit. You're right... There's absolutely no shame in seeing a counselor. I do wish more people who actually need therapy (and want it) could actually get it.

I've also heard about people advising others to pray on their problems. While I don't disagree with prayer and speaking to clergy about issues. It's not something to take lightly, and some people actually need therapy from a qualified professional.

 

There are all different types of counseling out there and people often seek and receive counseling without even realizing it. Often people are hesitant to get one type of counseling but not another. For example, I would bet that several of those on this thread who claim to not be one to go for counseling are open to financial counseling, job counseling, legal, and so forth. I would also bet that some of the same people offer different types of counseling in their own jobs (i.e. medical, legal, etc)

Within psychological counseling, there are many types of therapies used.

There is no shame or weakness in seeking counseling in any form. Often, it's a good way to learn new tools and techniques to use in our lives for different circumstances. As another poster stated, the mind will often shift into survival mode and tell ourselves that we are fine when in fact we may need help too.

I think many people are resistant to the idea of therapy because of stigma and costs. While I definitely think our mental health system is a mess in the U.S., there are all sorts of different therapies available for no cost or on a sliding scale.

I find it really sad that there are so many people who have such a negative view of therapy.

 

You're absolutely right. I didn't even think about legal or financial counseling. To your other point, I counsel patients day in and day out and without even realizing it, during the course of our time together, some have certainly opened my eyes to situations even within my own life. This whole thread I've been so focused on psychological therapy, I completely failed to see every other aspect counseling. Very good points miss KinCa (and welcome back )

 

Thanks hon!

I didn't bother with the article. I just more thought about my own profession and how so much of my work is about coordinating other professionals and many of them would not think of themselves as a "counselor" (even those with some type of "Therapist" in their title) yet they certainly are therapists and a great deal of what they do is some form of counseling.

 

Alot of depression come from a tragic situation or family tragedy being such as a near death experience on Operation excetera. this is the time that I believe a lot of people need to go to some kind of counseling or therapy to get help to get through that.

 

I agree about members of the black community fighting to remove the stigma surrounding it. I freely admit it, not as a badge of honor or something, but to friends going through tough times, to encourage them to seek help if they need it.

That article you posted also raised some interesting issues. I remember a black neurologist once saying on a WLRN talk show that he suspected as much as 50% of the black community could be walking around with a mix of non-combat PTSD and clinical depression that had never been addressed.

 

With the lead issue its going to get worse

 

Coupled with increased stress due to worsening economic conditions, fear of being a victim of violence, and more.

 

"my beliefs blacks dont for the following reasons:

1. the pride , ego thing. especially bm.

2. church. when i was growing up and not too long ago they would talk down on it and say take it to jesus.

3. blacks overall are afraid of doctors due to the tuskegee incident back in the day."

You hit the nail on the head....!