is it good to be the submissive wife

well stated. the other part of it is a woman needs to back him up when they work out the decision.

its total disrespect when a woman dont follow the plan

 

I don't take issue with this, but the problem is that some dudes let that go to their head. I do think many women would and do defer to their husband as the head of the household as long as he doesn't lose his mind.

 

I never been into submissive women, I have always liked more aggressive and outgoing slightly domme women but at the same time I believe either in a marriage or relationship, both partners should be equal.

 

Part of the article talks about how she stays home with the kids and he goes out and works (slays the dragons). I have to wonder how many people are really willing to create a marriage where the husband is working and the wife is at home taking care of the kids?

I've noticed often when these types of conversations come up, that part is left out.

 

I was fortunate to have that when I was married. My ex was military so it really worked best.

 

I did as well (non-military though). Actually, I've set things up so I'm with my children at home now even though I'm a single mom, work, and homeschool my younger kids. There's always a way if you are creative and resourceful enough.

I brought that up simply because there is often conversation about how people want things to be but they leave that part out. Or the conversations gets into how it's simply not possible in today's economy (which I've heard for almost 30 years)

It's all about choices.

 

Indeed.

 

i bow my head. woman you have my respect. more power to you!

 

Thanks! It's not easy, I definitely have to keep focused on my priorities, but it's doable.

 

i believe that. i raised my two girls alone, so i know it can be hard. but you can be proud of yourself.

 

Great post.
I think this is the first time I can agree with you 100%.
I had to be the man in most of my past relationships because the man wasn't a good leader and I didn't feel secure at all. I guess I got so used to it over the years that it would be hard to adjust to anything different. It would still be so refreshing to have a man who is able to take care of stuff and be my rock.

 

in so many words i said this before along with what samson is saying.."women want men to be leaders not dictators. good listeners and decision makers and up to the challenge. "


men are usually the ones looked at when things are foul. .. at the home and in the community

 

A submissive wife might be a little boring because I believe that marriage is a shared responsibility and it goes farther than having a clean home and dinner on the table at 6 PM. It is also an emotional responsibility. Do you respond to each other's existence? Why marry someone if you don't care or love that person? Would you talk with your spouse? Laugh or cry with your spouse? I read a book about egalitarian marriages. The couples in these marriages acted as equals and not competitors or rivals. Some men would like a submissive wife because it is about being the leader in the household. It would "make a man out of them" and boost their egos. It is difficult to find someone to love. But it is easier to lose someone you love if one is not careful.

 

Submissive doesn't mean boring.

 

I think you have a very skewed view of what a submissive wife means. It doesn't mean she's his servant and they don't interact. That would actually not be in keeping with the intent. But again, each couple is different and defines their own roles in their relationship. In my experience, it's been that both people have each other's backs no matter what.

 

This might be helpful. It discusses 7 misconceptions about submission.

http://www.girlsgonewise.com/7-misconceptions-about-submission/

 

haven't been tainted by steniem-like feminism...

 

Not skewered, just inexperienced. I've never had a healthy, committed relationship outside of platonic.

 

[YOUTUBE]ZFyyPNseWvA[/YOUTUBE]

 

Yes. It is negative. Giving your whole self to someone and losing your identity to please another human being is exactly the type of crap I don't have time for. lol

BDSM submission is another thing entirely, however.

See, there's my problem with it- RELIGION. Submission to a man is the foundation of religion, and it's part of the problem. What the hell is wrong with being equals in a relationship? I'll NEVER understand why religion is so popular. Well, I have my theories, but I won't get into it. It gives some people great comfort, though. I'll never understand it. More power to you, though.

Petty, I AM feminist - because I believe that people should be treated fairly, equally, and with respect. I do not hate men. I never have. That's a fundamental misunderstanding of what it means to be a feminist. While I have no problem with a man in charge, the problem comes when there's only room for "man in charge" and no room for "woman in charge". One sex is not inherently better than the other, so both sides need to be given an equal opportunity.

Amen. Leading and following should happen periodically, but they're not roles that must be followed consistently. Sometimes, one person may lead the other for awhile. I don't get the ideology that because a man is a man, he should be followed. I know some really DUMB men...just like I also know some DUMB women - so let's just not follow the dumb ones, k?