what did you learned from your break ups?

you did....(the money issue, the transgender, and the other online thing). was there anything else?

just curious.

like for me......setting up strong boundaries.

and such as recognize that this person doesnt seem to be of good character and lack integrity before they get their claws into you

 

Perfect

 

Being true to myself.
Trying to live as honorably and harmoniously in a world I never made.
Trying to live as a good man so that I may die a good man.

 

saying "no" doesnt make you evil....it means you are protective of yourself.

when people say or infer "if you love me then you would do __________" thats when its time to run.

 

There is great temptation in that deceptive inference. I had sometimes fallen victim to the "person in distress" back in the days. I say person because men use that tactic also to get something from you, probably more so than women because of the idea of men sticking together. I am sure you know the saying that goes, "The first time is happenstance. The second time is coincidence. The third time is enemy action."
I altered that saying a bit when it came to events going on around me.
"The first time is happenstance. The second time is coincidence. After three or more times of the occurrence; what have you learned?"

Some even play on the "Christian" angle and say things like, "Please. In the name of Jesus. Help me. Help me, please. In the name of Jesus."
If one helps, the person will say, "Thank you. God Bless You."
Sometimes these people are sincere and are in need. But other times, these people are just panhandling and hustling. I try to avoid them while being polite to them and simply say, " I'm sorry." And move on.

 

yep. exactly

 

I learned to change the passcode in my cellphone frequently because women are nosey creatures!

 

Get a privacy screen protector.

 

Word! Or I can just not put in my code when around a girl

 

Or get an iphone 5 and just use your finger print to get in. Solved my problem

 

I have an iPhone 5

 

Then what are you putting a code in for anyways?! Use that thumb of yours! I haven't used my code in forever...that fingerprint thing is fucking awesome.

 

:smt023

 

The biggest lesson i learned is people don't change (especially thouse with addictions) , no matter that they will tell you, it's just question of time, when bad habits comes back.. So sometimes is better to say goodbay, when stay in relationship witch has no future.. After my last terrible relationship ended i started to love myself more, because finally realised, it's not me bad, but he was idiot.. :axe:

 

I continue to try to grow and learn lessons from it. It's a work in progress, but I learned to stay away from passive-aggressive and needy people and to protect my solitude and peace of mind more than anything else.

 

After leaving an abusive relationship I learned:

Even though you shouldn't let other people in the middle of your relationship, if a lot of people you trust are telling you someone isn't good for you, you should at least take it into consideration.

And... even if I want to "fix" a relationship, sometimes it's not weak to give up and walk away and you're stronger for leaving.




Other than that...:

It's better to be alone and content, than to feel lonely with the person you're with.

It's better to wait for the one you want, instead of settling for "less".

Love is nothing without having trust and respect. It's easy to love someone, but it means a heck of a lot more if you trust them and respect them. I value an "I trust you" from the one I care about more than I would value an "I love you".

Life's too short for bad relationships (romantic or not), so if there's any relationship that doesn't offer personal growth of some sort, the relationship is just extra weight, better to cut the person(s) loose.

And... no relationship is ever the same. No love is ever the same. It doesn't matter how many people you fall in love with throughout life, there's never the same love twice, that's unique between each couple.

 

Damn... Reading your lessons and/or observations, I feel like I wrote them!

 

me too ... Nikkers, big ups to you for going through that.

 

This! Not only for going through all the bullshit, but for remaining such a sweetheart at the end of all of it. Too many people turn bitter instead of learning from their experiences and finding a way to maintain some level of trust in others. Big kudos to miss Nikkers :freehug:

 

Big ups babes!!

I DON'T deal with bitter women. I wish more would realize all the apples on the tree are not rotten. I commend Nikk for that.