Are we dating our oppressors?

Had an interesting conversation with an older family member last month where this person said that black men dating white women was basically turning back on the sacrifices black women made before them and then dating/marrying their oppressor and that while this family member wasn't completely opposed to it expressed an opinion that no matter what white people in general were always going to be at least unconsciously bigoted and see us as inferior. Thoughts? I mean is this the ugly truth nobody wants to face?

 

And when bw do it its what?

That argument is always promoted by some sad sack too insecure to go after ww or someone threatened by ww because Asians never spout that bs, Hispanics never spout that bs, and neither do Nativre Americans. Your oppressors have always been and will always be the wealthy elite who think of you as wage slaves if at all.

 

And if it wasn't the black community, they would be exploiting someone else.

 

real talk

 

i thinks every thing goes back to money,,,,,dark skin just made it easy to keep track,,i find my attraction natural,,,,but were all dif,,:freehug:

 

But but, no one in my family has ever oppressed anyone. And if we are talking about America, slaves were very expensive back then. Average white person didn't have any slaves.

 

To be fair a lot of white people still bought and traded with slave created products and slave driven industries. So they at the very least at times turned a blind eye to slavery. I mean we do the same with cheaply made products from China.

 

'To be fair'......... How many ...in the last century..... . Never mind

 

Uhhhhh, 62? Lol. Crazy subject.

 

Not everything comes down to a political equation.

Love is irrational whereas the motivation behind discrimination, especially at its highest level, is anything but. And congratulations to your family member for their mind-reading abilities.

 

The very first recognized interracial marriage in the US was a black woman and white man, and she is hailed as a civil rights pioneer

 

It's not an ugly truth, it's a ridiculous fallacy.

Your OFM fails to understand that by limiting romantic contact and integration, bigoted opinions of racial "inferiority" remain rife.
WW in IR are present, loud and proud to refute the prejudices that abound. We are in the trenches alongside our men, exposed to the oppression too - if not by being directly insulted, then by way of our men who endure it in their own lives. WW involved in IR don't oppress, we kick it's ass where we can.

Honestly, to be in an IR you have to have a hard stomach. If you don't have what it takes, then listen to your OFM and find yourself a nice Black woman then you "won't be turning your back on past BW" and leave this IR to those of us who BELIEVE in it and can shut down its detractors.

 

well stated.....if you are in an IR of any combo you will notice...
1. insecure people are the ones who complain.

2. groups are tribal....so if you notice jews, catholics and other religions push...date within the religion. so dont be suprised when you hear it bout race.
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haters are gonna hate.....handle it like the black guy did when the woman was throwing the racial slurs in front of dollar general. when you watch it then ask....why not go off ?

 

This. And what Saty said about mind reading abilities.

 

Even when people don't actively promote racism, many of us are guilty of either tacitly approving it (can be done by any race), benefiting from white skin privilege, or feeding into it (also can be done by any race).

 

what a question... *sigh* if i had the slightest doubt if a person i m dating is "oppressing" me i wouldnt date that person.
so why discuss about the if or not? just get of the train. just my 2 cents, no offense.

 

I feel you guys and agree with most of everything you're saying. Just something I kinda wanted to throw out there as Devil's Advocate. I think people who think they're better than people are bad regardless of race. But it is interesting that this is a view shared by some people.

 

If you have to guilt someone into dating you, then there is a good chance that you are an insecure, manipulative, sad A-hole. Expressing the benefits of any kind of relationship isn't necessarily a bad thing whether it's two people of the same culture or different cultures. But, claiming that, "You owe our ancestors your penis/vagina and your love/heart, and if you don't give it you don't support what they did and suffered for" is pure manipulation. I can like and even love any culture to include my own without having to date, marry, or have sex with it.

I would suggest avoiding any person that tells you that you owe someone so you must date whomever they want you to date. Manipulators don't care about your happiness, they only care about feeding their personal desires.

 

Why is it that only the bm/ww ir coupling is the topic to these type of convos? If someone ever tried to discuss this with me, I'd redirect them to the fact that your average ir couple is between a white male and a non-white female. Then I would tell them to seek help with their obsession with bm and who we decide to date.

 

people are ALLOWING other people dictate your mood.
spending too much time on they said this and they said. damn.

what needs to be done is have fun, and discuss how to have BLISSFUL relationships.

yall letting others mofos control you.