Would you date or marry someone with kids?

I would date someone with kids. There's almost no one in my age group who hasn't already reproduced or who isn't dying to get it done asap.

 

You should move to Italy. We get married and have kids very late here. Seriously! before that we are too busy trying to find some kind of a job that can pay a rent or a house loan. When we make it we are 40 and get married, then have kids and get complaints because having a kid at 40 is late. LOL

 

as someone with kids it may sound awkward but id prefer to date someone without kids. if she has a girl or girls i can handle it ok but would prefer not to have boys not related to my daughters around them.

 

Seriously? Is this because of mistrust? What if your woman has an infant son? Or a male toddler?
Could you not see your daughters being doting big (step)-sisters to them?

 

as my girls get older that possibly could be an option but at this time it would be nice if she didnt want kids of her own. in a year i bet my thought on this would be different.

 

Ok, well I was just going on the comment that you were ok if she had a female child, but not male children around your daughters.

 

yep, the ironic thing is when my daughters were around their toddler cousin they kept sayign they wanted a little brother and i kept saying naaaaa.

 

It's the same in Germany or Switzerland. Women want to have their own income and security, before they have kids.

 

The older I get, it becomes harder to meet someone without kids, but I still like to be with someone without kids. I have come across and know men who don't have any, so that's nice to know.

 

you know, as soon as you love someone, you will find a solution.. There is a solution for everything, especially for someone that is clear-headed as you are

 

ahh thank you!:smt052

 

If I were ever single again definitely without kids. I guess I'll keep swimming in the early to mid 20s dating pool till I age out lol

 

you never age out, thats only a frame of mind.

 

now that's what's up

 

It does make sense in a way. I prefre to date men with grown kids who don't have the weekend thing to do, or that have custody so they are part of our lives. Also don't mind younger kids under the same conditions. I either want to blend or for the kids to be welf-sufficent. I have my granddaughter one weekend a month and my ex-bf LOVES her, and we would have so mcuh fun with her.

 

My husband has two children from a much earlier relationship, however he hasn't (not by choice) seen them since the oldest was 3, and the youngest was born just after he and his ex broke up.
I find it very sad that he's not involved in their lives, and they don't know him, however, part of me is a little glad that he comes, to me, essentially without children. Not sure how I'd feel about being an active step-mum. I'm not great with other people's kids, so I think I prefer him without (although I'd never EVER deny him the chance to be a father to them...if he ever got that chance).

If I were single, I'm fairly certain I would MUCH prefer to date someone without children.

 

I think it all depends on the individual.

Some people will have kids with no manners and simply rude, others will be well mannered and respectful.

So its very much contingent on what kind of environment you are going into with that person who already has children.

 

What I hate to see is when women with kids feel they have to settle for less, JUST because they have children. There are plenty of us out here who will accept you and your children. Of course, there are some intangibles to consider, such as is the birth father in the picture and what, if any, relationship he has to the kids. I would have no problem with my ex marrying again as long as it is understood that I am the boys' father and I am still around. I do realize that that is often not the situation.

 

I would venture to guess that is because they listen to the media and other people who say that single women with kids have too much baggage and they should feel lucky to have any guy pay attention to them.

It's unfortunate that others would put so much stock in how the media tells us to view the world.

As a single Mom, I will tell you that in no uncertain terms will I settle for less than a man who would treat my daughter with the utmost respect and would treat me with the utmost respect. I am in charge of my daughter's emotional, physical, spiritual and mental well-being until she becomes an adult and I will not jeopardize that to be with a man who makes it clear that I should be grateful to him because no other man would want me and my daughter.

It doesn't work that way for me.

I've had encounters, when I was on an online dating site, with men who had the audacity to email me stating that they would be doing me a "favor" by dating me because I'm a single Mom. You know what I did to those guys? I didn't reply to them.

On a side note: I completely understand when a guy says he has to know the situation with the father and what he's getting into. I'm a step-mom and when I first started dating my then husband, the baby momma was a psycho and threatened to beat me up on several occasions and called me all sorts of derogatory names (she is Cuban). I stuck it out and while I look back and wonder why I did that, I can only be thankful I did, because I have my daughter.

 

I'd be dating the person, not their children. Who the person is, is what matters the most to me. I wouldn't lose interest after finding out they have a child, but knowing they have a child also will not draw me to them.

I respect men that have children and are involved with their child(ren)'s life, or if they attempt to be, as long as he doesn't have a dozen baby mamas or much drama in that sense going on. I'd want to know what I'm getting into, what role the child's mom has in their life. It's fine if someone already had kids, as long as the guy's general purpose of dating is to find someone to look after the kids and be a mommy figure.

Although, hopefully he'd still be open to having another if it came down to it, because I want to have a child myself. If I wasn't ready to have kids, I also wouldn't want to deal with anyone else's... but I'm ready when the time's right.