So Sick...

1. Of my Saints fucking up

2.missing Mark on Sundays because of our NFL routine. Just got home from being out a bit ago.

3. of predators

4. Of my well meaning friends IRL who don't realize that DUH i wa and am still in love and I can smile for a while and even make out, but my heart hurts. It gets better daily , but this aint something I am snapping out of like that,

 

Aw, I'm sorry. I'm probably overly optimistic but I believe that things, even the worst things, always get better eventually. In the meantime hugs for you.

 

I'm sorry honey, It is hard to make new routines. I am so sorry that your friends don't understand, take all the time you need to heal and take care of you. And truly it does get better one day at a time.

 

Dude you got one more week to complain about this before I start giving you some tough love. Breaking up sucks but no one died. Everyone is in one piece and healthy. That's truly the most important thing.
So fuck Mark and be firm with your friends. Enough trying to hook you up unless you secretly like the attention.
I know I'm gonna get it for this post but I had to say it.

 

TDK, she is moving forward in life but being honest with her feelings. She is actually quite healthy by processing what she is going through. It isn't like she is home alone in the dark eating ice cream and bawling. She is just having a few moments of sad..

 

LOL and and a hug. You are right . I am healthy, and so are my kids, grandkids, and my dear and true friends. And mel is right too.. a few moments that suck and make me sad is what it is down too as far was me feeling sad.

Sundays are bad during football season, so I am trying to break out of the pattern we had, the rest of the time. I really am fine, sure he crosses my mind, but I am okay.

Today should be a nice day. I am going to read and correct essays and then go to a boxing class. Tonight two of my best friends, who DON"T try to fix me up are coming over for dinner.

I start back teaching my adult ESL classes Tuesdays and Thursdays this week until the 13th of December, and literally have every weekend through Veternan's Day weekend booked so it should much easier to get over the Sunday Blues as I will be exhausted.

 

You have today off right? Lucky damn teachers, I'm so hating.
I'm curious do students pay for their ESL or is government funded.

 

Depends on the program. Mine is funded by Title 3, a government grant for parent involvement for low income families. The students have to have kids in the public schools in our town. There are 2 of us and we cap our classes at 25 people and have a LONG waiting list, it is free.

There are programs where students pay. I work this one because it adds onto my regular check and adds more into retirement.

 

I constantly look for free spanish or mandarin classes and can't find anything around here but there are dozens of ESL classes and it kind of pisses me off

 

LOL that is because people HAVE to know English in the US to get ahead as it is the international business language and the unofficial first language of the US. Like I said my classes are free to students as a part of a grant to get parents involved in the schools and to get them to help their kids academically, and they can;t do so if they don't speak the language their kids is educated in.

 

TDK means well justmel, one of the best things a friend said to me after a heartbreaking split was to just get over it. As much as it felt like that was a little heartless at the time, it actually made me think. I decided to cry my last tears and then when I wake up I will move on, move forward and darn it be happy, every day is a new day and a new chance to make things better for yourself.

Continue to be as strong as you can Stiletoe, take as long as you need to grieve for the relationship and when you feel you are ready to take the next step in moving forward you will thrive because of the type of woman that you are..

 

Thanks for the love. I am cried out,,just more pissed at the immature behavior, texts, calls and his STUPID friends...I just want to be left alone and not have to look over my sholder and make sure noboby sees me who reports back to him. Also I figure I pissed off KARMA because I am not going anywhere near his negihborhood and not going out expect to low key places with my friends, yet I keep running into his family and friends, and I live 20 minutes away from him in a major metro area. screw this LOL.

Anyway last vent...life is too short

 

Vent all you want, its better out then bottled up.... We don't mind, well I know I don't.... Atleast you know where your head is at and have some form of control over your emotions... Hopefully the unwanted texts etc stop asap.

 

Thanks sweetie, you are a gem...I am tired of ranting to my friends IRL because they just want to slam him and fix me up LOL. but TDK is right...its been 7 weeks and I need to quit bitching and forget it. I have blocked his number and all his friends I know, but he keeps using others phones..I am deleting without reading, but it pisses me off...I thought about a new phone, but decided no, he is NOT going to force me to DO That......AND DONE :smt038

 

Hang in there lovely...relationships are so hard. I understand exactly what you're feeling about knowing your worth, but wishing things were different and wanting him to WAKE UP to realize it.

Take your time, focus on moving forward, and please don't do too much to change yourself and your life. Especially if he doesn't deserve it. Be who you are. We are here to listen, if it helps.

TDK is right, sometimes tough love is what we need. Be grateful for friends like him who love you

 

LOL, damn son.

Tough love indeed.

As hard as it is, eventually you have to get to that point where its like time to move forward with life.

As long as you have your health, the rest is what you make of it.

 

Naw...it's good, sometimes we all need a kick in the ass. And my friends IRL are unwilling to do it , so leave it to TDK to get it done

 

I can imagine how painful it is when we remember those good times with someone you have cared for, their smile, their touch, their smell, that familiar scent, the sound of their voice, the gaze of their eyes upon you.

Guess you just have to look at it as its not meant to be.

As long as you are healthy stiltoes, live life to the fullest, many folks would give anything for that opportunity.

You never know when that new person may enter your life.

 

OKAY my friend LOL...not in the mood for a trip down Memory Lane, it a FABULOUS MOOD and wanna keep it that way.

I appreciate you being kind and gentle, but the booty kick is working its magic. :lol:. LOts of thanks though, you are a sweetheart:smt054

 

YAAAA! for a fabulous mood--Each day, does get better.