Calling out your own race for being racist

Speaking of Grandmothers

As a youngster, I spent a lot of time with my grandmother who was a retired principal of a middle school........ Because she was beloved by subordinates of all ethnicities, she ruled with out prejudice and quietly supported my preference for white girl friends long time ago. I trusted her judgment and support so much more than my mother and sisters that I once let her proof read a love note I was preparing....I owe it to her for seasoning my reading and arithmetic skills in my formative years and steering me in an engineering direction.......I wish I could hug, kiss her and take her out to dinner again.......I really miss that lady........

 

Yeah, recently, at an Asian eatery, don't anger those who prepare your food.

 

I've had to do that with my parents often in the past. Sometimes with other black people and people of other races too. You can't cry racism and be racist as well.

Two situations that come to mind;

When my father was dying in the hospital, my mother was talking to me about walking outside late in a certain neighborhood, and she went on a tirade about how white people will do this and that to me- I had to stop her, and remind her that a lot of the people helping my father where white, she didn't say anything along those lines after that while we were there to embrace his death.

Another time was with my gf, we went to a cool Japanese resteraunt in San Francisco and she was talking about Japanese internment camps and used the word jap. I was so dismayed she said that, in san francisco, at a japanese resteraunt where there were a lot of japanese people. I felt like I didn't want to know her. I called her out on it and told her she wouldn't say the n-word at a chicken and waffles place so she damn well better not say the j-word at a japanese place. Thankfully japanese culture prides itself on being silent and not making a scene, as I stated earlier, if it was a black bbq place we were eating at.. shit somebody would of got cut lol.

 

Holy crap - what an ignorant, tacky woman. Are you still dating her?

 

ROFLMAO Bliss.

 

:smt087

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Such a heartwarming read. Your grandma sounded like an incredible woman. You appear to have been blessed with being surrounded by some incredible people to help you become the special man that you are today, Arch.

 

Yup

Do it all the time

I call them out for referring to Asians as chinks too

As someone who had Asian friends/girlfriends, that's a no no

The way some blacks casually say stuff like that is surreal and uncalled for

If you really like ir, it's your personal obligation to help curb that shit

 

I completely agree. I hate it when people call Asian people "oriental". Or call everyone Chinese when they don't know their nationality.

 

like i said before..having been mutually interested in girls of just about every ethnicity, i find it hard to act like that or allow people to do that

if u care about someone, u wouldnt want them to be harassed u know

 

Well seniors in the Bliss family did an exceptional job with you too: You are beautiful Intellectually sharp, with a very insightful comprehension of black culture for a white woman.......

 

What's up with the Black men that date White women who love to refer to them as "White Girls"? That shit always seems off to me because the same men seem to have a damn fit if White women refer to Black men as "Black Boys". Give respect to get respect IMO.

 

generational gap obviously, OG

i can imagine younger ones not minding..black boys..black guys....white girls..white chicks

the older u get tho, ud think it would die out or be kinda rude

if u really wanna get deep with it, why refer to skin color/race period

just call em women

 

I don't mind being called a "girl" LOL. But I can't even let the two words "black" and "boy" fly out of my mouth one next to the other. My dad is a high school teacher and he used to say that all of the time when referring to his students, and I can just imagine how well that received. I say "black guys" or "black men" or if it's talking about a child, I might say "little black boy" but it makes me uncomfortable even then.

Hearing "black boy" out of a white man's mouth just makes me cringe though and I've told my father so.

The Caribbean guy I'm dating calls his friends (and himself) "rude boy" but it's an island thing and not offensively meant in terms of race, obviously.

 

And that's the point I'm getting at. Most people who date interracially on a regular basis regardless of color usually don't refer to color at least most of the people I know and interact with. Usually people still do who have some issues over race for some reason from what I've personally noticed. I was just wondering if that was anyone else's take?

 

perhaps

or perhaps it's just for descriptive purposes

regardless of how hard you try, skin color/appearance simply doesn't exist because you don't want it to

if someone is interested in details, i'd tell them. it's up to them to show tolerance and respect the fact that whoever you are with, is making you happy

with that said, i probably would not* just go around saying 'oh hey ya'll im dating a white girl'

*edit - meant to type would not earlier, but am working out and kinda half-assing my responses lol*

 

You clearly get where I'm coming from. And I am talking about the type of people who do just go around announcing race and way they do it always makes you go "Okay...So?" like they are expecting some kind of big reaction either negative or positive from playing up race.

 

definitely not my style

people generally ask me about race/ethnicity because they automatically assume I go outside the BW pool (you know, if you talk a certain way..walk a certain way...or signed up for one class at the local community college, you must not be 'black' enough)

so..they ask me so they can throw in a little ridicule (mainly from the black women lol) or sometimes show genuine interest in the lifestyle of IR dating

 

I find it annoying when people (especially white people) really really try SO hard to never mention a person's skin color, especially if they are describing someone (like at work, when you are describing a coworker to another person who doesn't know very many people).

"The tall lady with the short hair and the big earrings with the thing and the thing...err... umm...."

"Oh you mean the tall black lady? That's so-and-so."

Good grief. If there's one Asian guy or one red-headed girl, you should be able to describe them as "the Asian guy" or "the red-headed girl". Black is not a bad word but people dodge around it like it is. Makes me very suspicious indeed.

 

sorry to intrude, but why did you hang out with those white guys, knowing that white males tend to have the propensity to be racist? especially if there were no blacks there?