I had a Black woman refer to a White man as a "cracker" while relaying a story to me. I listened to her story, but I told her that the racism was uncalled for. It threw her off a bit, and she looked at me like I broke some sort of racial code. Anybody ever have to check someone of their own race for doing/saying something racist?
Normally I will go off on somebody for saying something as simple "them" or "those people", but last night the words came from a man in a wheelchair who had something in his nose to help him breathe...he was hanging out with my buddy Wolf (also a scary white guy...old biker guy who runs security for a local bar I frequent)... I just didn't have the heart to fight back. He's in a wheelchair. I thought about it, but refrained. I felt like a sell-out, but it was so subtle, and the fact that he was immobilized and helpless... I just couldn't do it. Normally I would make some noise. It felt like the right thing to do.
Good for you, Thump. :smt023 I do every chance it's said in front of me. Sometimes I'm shaking my head because often it'll come out of nowhere. I'll be having a regular conversation with someone and suddenly racism rears it's ugly head and I'm stunned for like 2 seconds, then I'll call them on it (like you did). Some calmly ie:'excuse me, but why did you just say that?" if for no other reason than to make them examine themselves. Others who are lost causes though, I won't give a shit, they'll hear it loud and clear.
The other night, I was hanging out with 3 white guys at the back of a bar, outside where it's chill. They broke into "jokes" and said something about "Ever heard about the one with the 3 black guys and the ..... *drum roll*" I just said that I didn't want to hear that one. I just had a feeling something filthy was going to fly out of their mouths and I was not going to be a part of it, especially WHEN I have had fair warning.
Yes. Either with an eye roll or words. Why are only the ww answering this question?? Does this mean the men don't call people on the carpet?
Yes, that is exactly what it means... Seriously though, I normally ignore the idiotic things people say. Forums are really the only place I engage the idiotic and or offensive things that people say. A month ago (or two) I decided to include forums into my philosophy. I don't normally like to engage these kinds of people for two reasons. 1. "When we entertain fools we become fools ourselves" So anything beyond a dirty look, a one sentence scolding, or shaking my head is not normally in my repertoire. The more I continue to explain how that might offend, the more defensive the person gets. Before you know it the person is talking about something that has nothing to do with you or the comment (Normally some past experience that they feel gives them the right to be offensive in public). And at this point I feel as though their silliness is rubbing off on me. So, I keep comments to a minimum if at all. 2. If they say it, they rarely will have a problem saying it again. So, as I may interrupt and say, "That's offensive and I would appreciate it if you wouldn't...", they will just wait for me to leave. Then the games continue. I find it very easy to intercede when it involves someone I know or when it involves a helpless person (say someone is saying racial slurs to someone in a wheelchair). But, I do believe that sometimes (not always) what goes around comes back around and I take pleasure in that. Racist wm makes a black joke and then ends up having to work for someone black. Racist bw makes a white joke and her son marries a ww. Or whatever their biggest fear is. I have experienced racism quite often, and I am sure many people have. It is quite easy to brush it off in public. I realized a while ago that everyone that has called me a racial slur is far less intelligent than I am. In addition, I am not the "racial police". So, I may make a comment, but I would more than likely no longer associate with the person who said it (assuming they were a friend).
LOL, as black men we are more likely to be dealing with the nonsense first hand via some subtle ignorance, as opposed to a second or third party scenario encountered. I've never really encountered up front situations with other blacks that were blatantly racist in overtones from people I interact with. I generally keep a stiff upper lip and folks who know me know I love white women so they will keep their opinions to themselves if they have any that aren't worth mentioning. My thing is white/black/Asian/Hispanic/whatever have respect as a human being, that is what I look for in a person. I detest raw, unfettered ignorance.
Absolutely. It annoys me too much to let it go. I even checked my old boss when he said something very judgmental about my X. The only time I would let it go if its really old people like my grandmother who is 92 years old - there is really no point to go there w her.
LOL, its just that folks usually think of Northern Europe as a bastion and beacon of open mindedness and tolerance in places like Sweden/Norway/Denmark, etc, especially when compared to other parts of Europe and even America. But as Anders Breivik showed, every society, even the most tolerant ones, can have its warped individuals.
Well, when you are close to 100 yo, you might have some funny ideas that was rampant back in the day. They are not racist per se, more ignorant crap really. She once said that "black people are not made to live in cold climates", she doesnt mean any harm, juts ignorant blabbery. I used to get on her when I was younger and that just led to arguments. There is really no reason to try to educate a 92 yo
You had me rolling with that line FG. Reminds me of some knuckleheads I have heard saying why do white people look like lobsters when the sun is extremely hot in high temperatures. You have to laugh at all the silly shit sometime because of the pure ignorance of it all.
Pretty much what GQ said. And for the record, tell your grandma that cold weather and me are best friends. And the proof is that my dick size doesn't shrink. It just grows a red nose.
I'll always remember my adorable late grandma, when it became apparent to her that I was coming of age and that I also liked BM, offered me her sage Greek 'advice'...pulling me close she whispered "Listen to me, ok, color doesn't matter at all, just find a man who has plenty of money ok, that is what is important, that he is rich and can look after you" as she rubbed her fingers together and winked, then she kissed my cheeks. Ahhh, bless her soul. LOL.
