What would you do?

If the person you loved suffered from illness that changed their personality to something untenable?

 

one of my brothers has a brain tumor that cannot be operated on as it's in a place that they just can't get to. this tumor is in a spot which affects his hormones.
before he went on his current medication to shrink his tumor, he had never shaved, had no sex drive at all, was developing breasts and was leaking milk. since the medication, he's started shaving, growing hair on his body and started getting testosterone treatments. he's more aggressive now than the boy/man i have know for 38 years.
it's all just adjusting to the new person he's becoming

 

How much of a 'loved one" are they? Is this illness temporary?

If so, then they will revert back to their old self hopefully once they get better. If not, then it depends how much you can bear. Obviously if one is at the untenable point, distancing would be the only solution. Making sure to explain to them why one is, would be expected and only fair.

Personally I have a high tolerance for loved ones with illnesses. I tend to overlook a lot..being sick can change anyone's personality.

 

Would you commit to that for a lifetime, if you had a choice?

 

Well a choice brings into play my former question - how much of a loved one are they?

If immediate family, I would commit until they died. If a cousin of friend whom I loved, IDK. The only exception would be my BFF, I would be there for them until they died, too.

I realize "being committed to" can be a long time, especially because many illnesses are now medically manageable, but if you commit to and accept the good times, then you should to the bad times.

 

co-sign, but I wouldn't limit it to my family, family can be pretty foreign at times. Just people I love and I spent my time with. Life is not always sunshine, reliance is one of the most important things in relationships, however they might be. I am not the person of leaving as soon as problems show up and if someone I love would need my help, because destiny is cruel to them, I need to find the energy to bear the situation. That is what really counts in life, how strong you are, when life rules someone with a rod of iron.

 

I have no idea. Until I'm in a situation like that I am unable to answer the question.

 

Agreed.

My closest family members though... I'd stick with them through it. If I was married to a person or 'very' committed, I'd stick with them as well.

I honestly wouldn't know until I'm in the situation though.

 

The keyword is love. Like the others have said, If I love them, I'll try to be there for them as long or as much as I can and support them as long as I can take (depends on the illness).

This makes me think of Alzheimer's.

 

What if maintaining the relationship was harmful to your emotional well being?

 

You have to find balance. Caring for someone else at the expense of completely destroying yourself isn't good, but neither is turning your back on someone who needs you. I think it depends on the illness and the relationship you had/have with that person.

 

I will say that if I was the sick one, I would want my loved ones to know to get on with their lives and not sit around watching me get sicker or watching me die.

I don't know what I would do on the other side.

 

Exactly what I would've responded with =)