what do white women love about black men?

Consider my view point totally challenged right now.

 

Because Americans control the media so they can highlight their giving more and as country they have more disposable income to give. Now you wanna measure empathy how about you measure the amount of untreated people with health insurance in this country versus poorer countries.

Or better yet the poverty compared to the richest most chartiable country in the country. How about more aide to actual tax payers just saying.

 

If we weren't giving to begin with there wouldn't be anything for the media to highlight. The fact is we are to a fault. :smt102

We might not do it quiet or humbly but nonetheless.

 

Why I Enjoy Black Men

Ahhhhhhh-

First and foremost I want to say hello and its been awhile. I just wanted to stop by and see how everyone is doing....

I love the taste of a black mans skin, the color contrast of my white body laying next to him...
I love eyes that are oh so dark and I love how a black mans tool feels in my shed.....
I love then urgency they have to get pussy and I love how god had gifted them with amazing body configurations....

I love me some black men!

 

:smt013

 

Not entirely true, other westernized nation mostly fit under the bill of more socialist idea sets, something that is often ridiculed here in the states. Especially with the "pull up by your own boot straps" is usually tossed at our more "socialist" western societies.

It makes a lot of sense as to how independence and empathy are related. Empathy is of course the feelings and concern for others. Something that more co-dependent individuals require in order to be able to depend upon one another. Since an independent person only has to rely on themselves, they often judge other situation and perspective solely through their own accords,
instead of trying to relate to another person's shoes. An independent person, whose able to handle things on their own, is much less likely to provide assistance towards others due to the belief of, "if I can do it, so can you."
Co-dependent individuals however focuses on using an entire group to help out each other, and judge the feelings and issues of others so that they to can help.

A perfect example, the movie The Blind Side. Now as someone who was adopted and came from very unfortunate past experiences, I myself could relate a lot to Oher and his troubles, as the things that he has gone through
within his life, I myself had similar experiences. On the other hand, this movie was ridiculed by a lot within the black community as a white savior movie.
The problem is that many looked at it through their own perspective, instead of a perspective of someone such as myself within this situation. On the other hand, my friends from Japan all loved the movie, and constantly asked questions to me regarding how my life was in comparison to the movie. Instead of already prejudging the situation accordingly, they wanted to know more from someone in those shoes so that they could understand. It's funny cause I tell them I wish I got a football scholarship too but unfortunately I wasn't as lucky as him.

Unfortunately, I was unable to go to the school library to look but I should be able to go tomorrow after my art class.

 

A "team player" and empathy are two completely different standards. A person can be a team player and still lack empathy. A person can be completely apathetic towards in individual but still work with him to get the job done. And that's where the team player usually resides around, getting a job done and primary for corporate reasons. But just because one is a team player does not mean he will automatically look through another person's perspective, or he/she is willing to give someone a crying shoulder and listen to their problems, or provide encouragement needed for them to make it through whatever issues they have. How many times do you hear people complain about not wanting to listen to other people's problem because they have "their own problems" to deal with. Or the constant statements of "quit cryng" or "man up" and handle things.

Again, I can go on and on and I'm not saying that places like Japan or Mexico is a perfect place. I'm just saying that in more group orientated cultures, there is usually a greater display of empathy within that group. In Mexico, it's with the family, in Japan, it's literally everyone Japanese.

As for Japan changing their education system, that's partially incorrect. Japan "was" changing it's educational system to fit a more western style approach, but when they were making those changes, Japan ranking in the world in both math and science drop drastically. So now they are setting it back to the way things were.

 

I completely disagree. I'm one of the most independent people you'll ever know, and I'm also the resident bleeding heart liberal. I do not lack in empathy. I'm well aware of the privileges I've had which have afforded me the opportunity to be independent, and I do not judge other people's situations through the lens of my own experience.

I don't think you'll find anyone on the forum who would tell you different about me. Though there's a few who aren't thrilled with my feminist leanings.

 

In a capitalistic society, "the spoils go to the victor". That's the one attraction to the U.S. that's unique among other nations. You can come to this country, as an immigrant, not speaking the language, being in the lowest social strata of your former country, uneducated formally, and still, you can become successful. That's a tremendous opportunity for people and many people who've had a skill or a "good idea" have been able to leverage that into success. You only have to look as far as the local Thai or Chinese restaurants, or laundries. One of the young guys I workout with in my local gym is Mexican. He came over the states several years ago and learned how to "hang sheet rock" and install "drop ceilings" working out as a laborer. Now, at barely 30, he's an independent contractor and his wife owns a beauty salon. Another workout partner, also Mexican, has a similar story, but with plumbing. Then, there's Arnold Schwarzenegger, a muscle-head who spoke broken English, are we know about his success. Is capitalism perfect, no, but it's impact to affect people's lives in positive ways is undeniable.

Despite your comments about empathy and co-dependent people, I suggest that the comments don't follow a logically and aren't true. A co-dependent person doesn't "work" with anyone, there actions are born out of necessity. This person is more often a "leech" sucking the resources of others for his own gain. That sounds more akin to a lack of empathy to me? As a matter of fact, self-interest or having expectations requires that you to put your needs and desires ahead of others.

If you're an independent person who's become successful, you're better able to empathize for the person who has less, as you did at one time, and because you have more resources, your'e better able to share with others. Please note the number of "independent" people who've started foundations and engage in philanthropy to help others, people like Bill Gates or Oprah Winfrey and a vast number of the ultra rich and independent people.

 

My intentions was never to make a blanket statement. My statement wasn't to say that every single person whose has independent thinking also lacks empathy, because that would be a stereotype essentially. It's just that it's usually seen that those with greater establishment of independence also
have a lack of empathy. This statement isn't meant to say that every one who has independence are apathetic.

 

You're guilty of misreading my comments. You've got to go back and you'll see that I was referring specifically to the idea that the Japanese work together for a common good and that people in the U.S. don't cooperate in the same ways, period. My comments suggested nothing about a correlation between team play and empathy...and I don't see one.

I've no idea why you continue to bring up cultural differences in other countries to explain your position as you're making apples and oranges comparisons. The context is the place where we live, the U.S.

Actually, I'm totally correct about the Japanese educational system, and it's very much in the process of change. They've realized that their system is geared toward passing exams so that students can gain entrance to prestigious universities. They've recognized the fallacy of rote learning and more schools are attempting to stir the creative facilities of students as part of the movement to create independent thinkers.

 

You are talking about the classic american dream, but just like how you can provide examples of success stories, that still doesn't change the fact that America has one of the largest richest to poor ratio's in the world today. It's
the benefit and negative side that comes with the extreme independence valued in this country. If you are strong enough, capable enough, and have the right resources, you can do something amazing here.

But if you aren't strong enough, or can't find the resources, or are stuck where resources aren't available like many urban communities, or are simply refuse the resources or opportunities due to examples such as the color of your skin, than you are left on your own to find some way to swim or either drown. And many do just that, drown essentially.

I'm sorry but your co-dependent belief is entirely of base. What you are referring to is just dependent, not co-dependent or group orientated. With
dependent, which is like how you describe, you are just "leeching" off resources because you do not wish to provide for any in return. You only take, and take, without giving. Co-dependent, or group orientated is completely different. They give, and they take so that everyone survives and manages. It's goes by the saying "a chain is only as strong as it's weakest link", and thus they make sure that everybody looks after everybody to make sure that everyone remains strong. So a co-dependent person may have their mom come over and drop off groceries, but when he has time, he realizes that his mom needs a new microwave and goes to the store to buy her one. In the end, they are taking care of each other, that's co-dependent.


And more resources equal more empathy? Highly disagree, take for an example the republican party, or CEO's. CEO's are taking in record high profits and yet still people are hurting for jobs. Instead of taking that 11 million dollar bonus to buy another beach house, they could have instead provided jobs for perhaps 100 people. But since they only care about themselves, and what they want, we have the situation we have today with Occupy Wall Street now trying to fight back. And why? Because of the selfishness born partially out of independence and only caring about the material items they have
and not what they can do for others.

 

Are you people serious? The idea of the individual first is what's killing this country along with other nations. You personally might not do it but its definitely the cancer that's killing this world.
Whatever....

 

I never stated that American's don't cooperate in the same way, that
was a misunderstanding on my comments. I never made blanket statements
saying that it doesn't happen in America because that would be asinine. But
I do believe there is a greater sense of working for a common good in Japan than in America. Due to their universal health care standards, much lower reading illiteracy, much lower percentage of individuals classified as power as well as a much lower percentage between rich and poor, lower crime rates, etc etc.

As for bringing in other countries, technically this entire conversation is taking things out of context from our original conversation. I'm actually shocked that we have diverge into such a different topic. But the original conversation between huntress, DK and I was that she claimed co-dependency and more closer family orientated individuals indicated a severe lack of growing up.

The bringing up of different cultures illustrated the fact that it has nothing to do with growing up, and everything to do with it being different cultures. Funny enough, she explain how independent she was and even with slew of examples of different cultures of more family orientated society, she still stuck to her beliefs of calling individuals such as mongolian men who drink breast milk from their mom a child, even though that's their culture. Which actually provides another example of proving my point that those with high amount of independence usually look at things through their own perspective without
putting themselves in different cultural viewpoints.

And do you have a link or magazine title towards this. The only thing I heard of from my friend was that they were trying to mimic a more western society school and thus they for example stop having school on saturday's. But as the
ranking of Japan math and science dropped, they reinstated school on saturday for kids.

 

Again, I can see that this is going nowhere as you parse and choose what things you wish to respond to. You've even created your own language for purposes of discussion, when plainly the discussion centered around young people who're dependent. Now, suddenly, you introduce variants of dependency, I think not. You're also selectively reading as I never made any statements of absolutes. I refuted your positions by showing why logically they don't hold water. Arguing the negative, doesn't destroy the validity of obvious and prevalent actions by those with resources. So, your points about the Republican party and the actions of public corporations just becomes sound bites to favor your position. Clearly, those with more give more. Clearly, philanthropic activity is a tremendous source of giving, and try as you might, that's a reality.

At the end of the day, personal responsibility is still the MOST important factor, in spite of ANY adversity. It's just that some dependent people would rather wallow in excuses than find the ways and means to move forward. So, much success to you, sir..and good evening. I'm taking my independence to go to the gym now.

 

:smt005

 

Not at all.

1) I have responded to everything you stated. So me choosing what things to respond to is entirely false.

2) I'm not sure what discussion you were referring to, but my discussion I had with huntress was about the point I illustrated in my earlier post. huntress wasn't merely just talking about dependency, she was talking about being super closely knitted with you family in general, from a mom having a key
to a man's apartment, to a mom having the right to stay at son's place even at the refusal of the wife, to my sister wanting me to stay at her place without the consent of her husband. She attributed all of that to not growing up, and my response was that it had nothing to do with growing up but in fact co-dependency usually seen from different non-white cultures.
From there, you brought the conversation into a different plane almost completely where we debated independence vs group orientated society. But that wasn't the original conversation I was having. The original conversation I had was with huntress illustrating that such close ties with family doesn't have anything to do with growing up but just a different standard view among cultures.

3) I'm sorry, but just like how the republican party and ceo's were supposedly sound bites of mine, the same can be stated towards yours. You name what, 2 out of how many billionaires and millionnaires that give money to charity? Steve Jobs didn't give money to charity. Just because someone has the resources to provide a lot doesn't mean they will, just as my previous post illustrated.

And that's your opinion. But again, you are American, and thus it would make sense for you to have this sort of belief, to be honest. Just like how I belief that in the end of the day, the expectation of having people conform to a certain level of strength when everybody is different will continue to cause the class clashes, and rich-poor disparities that we have today. But since we
care more about sending what, a trillion dollars in war that merely killed 3000 in 9/11 over something like health care that affects 20 million people, it's not really that surprising to be honest.

 

You actually misinterpreted my entire point. However, I'm kind of done with the whole line of conversation, so I won't waste my time trying to reiterate what I was saying.

 

Holy shit damn near 200 pages. Take a bow troll you were really successful in stirring shit up.

 

In Tony Soprano's stead:



You guys are writing dissertations. Good God! LOL.