Random Conversation 2.0

Random Conversation 2.0,......................................

bookworm,

you are most welcome please. i read your reply to the dark knight too, and is smart way to handle that i am thinking also. am excited for you so much, and stay with hopes of such good happiness for you, and the engineer man too! smiles, is exciting moment for you so much! have the best fun!

alexis

 

All I'm reading are excuses Book. Ask the man to lunch. Make the right opportunity. I'm not trying to be rude or overstep but too many of us act like we have all the time in the world and that's not true. We gotta make every moment count.

 

LOL..Bookiebaby..why are you so afraid? Try to make it simple, you need not to tell him, what you feel, at this time. Let him feel instead. I am sure there are a lot of possibilities to invite this man, if it's now an apero afterwork, or lunch or cinema with your friends or anything..Take the chance , finally!:smt005

 

guilty pleasure...now i`m addicted to The challenge: Rivals from MTV
hahaha

 

Nice to have a quiet day, but too tired to even enjoy the day lol...
have an appointment in the evening .. and not feel like going

anyways can not wait until my son come home today so he can tell me about his first day at Target lol
he will be there for a week for work placement

 

I'm marching toward the time that I will be telling him. I know that it will be sooner rather than later. And as it is, I'll just be confirming what I'm sure he already knows.

I'm afraid of rejection for one.

I will be seeing him soon enough outside of work. I just prefer to do it on a weekend, so that if he doesn't like me in that way, I at least have a day or two to compose myself before seeing him again.

 

And that my friend sums up why women can never give advice to men on how to approach women lol

 

Not true. We can give you advice because we're on the other side of it. LOL Just like you can give us advice.

Doesn't mean it'll work, or that it'll take away the fear of rejection. It just means that we can help you stop looking like an asshole when you do it (and you can stop us looking stupid too).

 

So false lol. You have little clue what it takes to approach you and what will work since you're on the other side and don't have to do it. Dating to me is like hunting, you don't ask the dear how it was shot because it reacts it doesn't act. You ask the hunter.
Truth be told the only thing that takes away the fear of rejection is frequency.
For a man to do well with women he needs to be mentored by a successful male dater not a successful female dater since the rules for female success aren't the same as male success. Successful male daters never look like assholes, I could easily show a guy how to get a woman(before the haters weigh in, remember what I say and do on this forum isn't close to how I speak to women I want to have sex with), I've got five rules and its always worked for me without fail. I took pointers from all the successful men in my life. Now if I want to know how to make a relationship work I'm more likely to ask a woman since they have a better idea of that. You guys are usually the glue.

 

If all men think like this, it's no dang wonder there are so many single women. You might have gotten the approach for a hookup down pat, but not for a relationship. You won't get to a woman's heart with the attitude that you, as a man, know what it takes and getting advice from women is useless. *smh*

 

Ches its not an attitude as much as recognizing what works and what doesn't. You might have an idea what works on you but you don't have a clue on what works on other women because you don't have to approach them. Unless you're a lesbian, even then its slightly different, you literally have no clue.
Like if I had a daughter and she wanted to learn about child birth I'd tell her to ask an OB/GYN before asking her mother. Yeah her mom knew what it was like to give birth to her but a doctor would have far more information since they've had to do it with more frequency.
A woman's heart is the easiest thing to win if she wants the man to win it. There's nothing I say or do that will influence that. They make up their minds long before that.

 

DK, I don't think it's fair to say that I have no clue what works for other women. Any more than you can say that successful male daters are the ones to go to for the best advice. I am a woman, and by and large, most of us want to be treated in a similar fashion. Now, is a successful dater a good resource for a guy who has little or no confidence and wants pointers on how to conduct himself? Sure! But to say that a guy knows better than a woman what women want is a bit ludicrous, imo. We are not all THAT different.

If I want to know how men feel or what they like/dislike in a woman, or want advice on how to best relate to a man I'd prefer to go straight to the source, not take another woman's advice as gospel.

 

You're not focused on the subject. We're talking about dating and how to approach someone. If you don't have to do it you simply can't give advice on it. Would you take advice on your taxes from a seasoned accountant or a bunch of people who've taken their taxes to an accountant.
Btw if you want to relate to a man just focus on things you have in common and otherwise just leave the poor man alone. I find that too many women want to be partners in every aspect of their lives and don't respect the fact that you're both individuals. I'm sure guys do it too but that seems to be what I hear men complain about most.

 

Don't bother Ches. Once DK has decided that his superior "worldly" knowledge of all women trumps anything you know about being a woman, there's no convincing him of anything else.

 

LOL! *Note to self...*

 

I fail to see how that has any relevance. If it was someone in a club that I was interested in, I'd go up and talk to him no problems. If he rejected me, who cares? I'd likely never see him again.

You proposed that I ask my coworker to lunch. But in that scenario, if I tell him about my crush during lunch and he says, I'm flattered but not interested, then this is what happens:

We have to finish the lunch.
We have to drive back together.
We have to spend the afternoon sitting next to each other.

Talk about awkward.

So, I will tell him on a Friday night, so if I get the "I'm flattered, but..." speech, there are 2 days where things have a chance to go back to normal and then maybe it won't be as awkward on Monday....

 

Yeah like your worldly know it all attitude about men and family. :smt120

And you nor any of the other have ever given a credible/logical answer to if you never have to actually approach, meaning go up to someone and make the first move on nearly every attempt to meet someone, then how can you you know what it takes to approach someone. You can have all the theoretical discussions you want but like every other part of life I'd rather listen to the person with experience over the person who thinks they know what they're talking about.

 

I agree (with the bolded part). Sounds like a good plan, Bookie! I wish you the best and hope he responds favorably!

 

The relevance is that men are conditioned to deal with opposite sex rejection through out life. Like Jaisee said in an earlier post dating is like a job hunt where men fill out the applications and women do the hiring. When you have to deal with 100 NOs to get to that one yes things like what you're talking about at work don't seem as big a deal. Btw good luck this weekend.