This is NOT my opinion but I want to know other people's thoughts..

Cheers all and BRILLIANT work posting that link of celebs who have strayed.

 

The worst examples of ourselves are usually the ones that are portrayed most. Naturally the only exception is if youre part of the majority. Mostly because you then have more control over your own image.

That said, ive never been one to dismiss patterns of behavior completely. But, im wise enough to realize the difference between the significance of RACE and the significance of POVERTY. Something bigots tend to ignore in the spirit of relating negative aspects of people with inherit attributes of their race.

 

What do you mean by this? Do you mean separately to this thread topic or related? A bit confused. Please explain?

 

Its directly related to what your roommate said.

If someone attributes a pattern of behavior to a particular race, are they accounting for culture? Are they accounting for poverty? Most often NOT. Because when you do, you leave open the possibility of your own kind conducting themselves similarly when things werent peachy.

You should have asked him if a professional black man in suit and tie gets the same tag of being susceptible to infidelity as a unemployed hood rat.

Example....

Myth: Blacks are susceptible to violence.

Truth: Disenfranchised poor people are susceptible to violence. See 19th century Irish gangs in NY for proof.

 

OK I get that but I dont understand what being poor has to do with infidelity among any colour? Sorry if it's obvious but I'm not getting it? My housemate is not the suit-wearing type himself by any stretch so I dont think his opinion was coming from any angle of socio-economic considerations? Nor is he wealthy etc (we live in quite a poor suburb of London to be honest)....

I agree that poverty has something to do with crime and violence in any colour. I do not see what it has to do with cheating??? And if you're referring to 'culture' are you saying cheating is part of black culture? I'm not understanding this at all mate?

p.s. housemate not roommate lol in the UK we dont share rooms but a four bedroom house haha

 

Myabe i got lost, lol...I was referring to this line...

"he said about BM that he believes "they make great fathers, but make awful partners"....BM cheat more."

anyway never mind, carry on.

 

Youre missing the point entirely. His wearing a suit has nothing to do with anything. My point was that some people attribute patterns of behavior to particular races without attributing any aspect of it to matters unrelated to race.

As for how being poor relates to infidelity, I dont think it has a significant impact but I do believe that those who grow up poor in single family households are more likely to have unsuccessful relationships. Not merely being BLACK.

My overall point in mentioning this was not to highlight poverty at all, but to instead highlight people's lack of mental depth whom attribute patterns of behavior to particular races

 

True and agreed re the suit thing. I didnt mean that, just wanted to make it clear that he wasnt a stereotype suite-wearing-guy is all.

I disagree on the second point. Some of my best friends grew up poor and some still are and have incredible relationships. I myself didnt struggle growing up and I myself have not had such luck, same with other friends of mine who actually grew up in wealthy homes. It's really varied. I think the examples you have at home and the relationships you see growing up can often play a bigger factor in infidelity than your economic status....and an unsuccessful r/ship can be because of a myriad of things other than infidelity, no?

Final point - I agree 100% and totally that attribution of general stereotypes to any race is shallow and narrow minded. :smt045

 

More emphasis on the single parent aspect than poor. So I generally agree.
It always helps to see successful examples of your role models growing up.

 

Yup, sure does. My folks are divorced now, but still the best of friends and I love them to pieces. Best parents I could have asked for. Except for the fact that Daddy-pooh is not the most faithful. Hence me having such major issues with infidelity in general and it being my biggest fear haha

 

I'm sure WM aren't the only ones who do this and not all WM do it of course but most of my male friends are white. And many really do think they are God's gift to women when compared to other races of men. Black men cheat, Arab men turn their women into slaves, Mexican men are sexist, Asian men are control freaks and bad in bed, etc.

Yet when you see any WM exhibiting those characteristics, which many WM do, they're written off as exceptions and individuals. Naturally they aren't representative of any "white male trait".

Honestly I'd take anything a WM says about any other group of men with a very small grain of salt.

 

I think this stereotype exist only b/c white men especially those in power are able to hide their infidelities, although alot or being exposed today. White men cheat like crazy don't let'em tell you other wise cause they just lying.

 

I think it's also a good way for white men to convince white women to leave black men alone. They have been trying that for ages.

 

Let's add "To Catch A Predator" host Chris Hansen to the list.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/29/chris-hansen-caught-cheating-on-wife-camera_n_887289.html

 

Ahahaha you might just have something there! :smt045

Not re my housemate but WM in general lol

 

:smt108

A WW talking to a White guy about dating BM is like seeking council from a nazi about converting to judaism.

 

Lol, well said! Which is why I put the question here. Truth be told, I didnt ask my housemate, he volunteered the info when I was talking about my new found fascination with BM since moving to London :yawinkle:

 

Dude, very very very good question. My thoughts?

Two possible influences:

1. White folks both male and female who have an issue with BM. I dont date BW obviously but I wonder whether they in turn have a reputation for...I dont know, promiscuity or whatever the case may be? If so, again, white folks who have an issue with black people. And even more specifically, those who are bothered by IR. In short, racists.

2. This is a bit controversial and I mean no offence, but I wonder whether BM themselves contribute? Surely there are dudes out there (both white and black but right now we're talking about black) who are players and who think it's cool, like to brag to their mates about how much pussy they've gotten, etc....I suspect this is going to be younger dudes as that kind of behaviour is a big fat flashing immaturity sign. Sadly I do know of boys who brag....or at least who are flippant about having cheated on their woman. And I think any male that does that is going to add to a stereotype, especially where a particular 'race' or 'culture' or whatever is already so prone to being slapped with stereotypes?

Thems my thoughts.