what are your personal "red flags" when dating?

No, Appiah - if you read the thread, bad credit was listed as a "red flag" by other people, not myself. That is not an "intuition" based thing unless you are there with her when she is trying to buy a new sofa and can't get financing.

Small hands are just distasteful to me. Ever since I saw a high school friend with her new boy friend, and he had hands with little delicate bird bones. She acted like he was so hawt, and my other friends and I were just grossed out. To this day, I will always notice a man's hands - they've got to be manly. One of my first boyfriends even had a deformed hand and that didn't get in the way, so nobody needs to think I'm that shallow - it was a developmental birth defect that happened to him, not a gene thing. His other hand was good enough that he could play first string basketball.

 

SO a man wit a deformed hand with the other hand being large is better for you than a man with small hands thanks for clarifying that up believe me i am not being sarcastic i just wanted know why it was a red flag and you answered me.

 

Yes, that is correct and you're welcome. At least with a guy with one deformed hand, he can touch me with the other hand and I don't feel like I'm being pawed by a spider monkey or raccoon (or even worse, a little boy).
He was a wonderful guy - we were great friends and had high respect for each other. Everybody loved him. Later in life he messaged me secretly to say that he regretted letting me go so easily although we were both just teenagers (after seeing my art exhibition and getting my card).
That's how much I dislike naturally tiny hands on a man. I like those long slender piano fingers with fingertips that reach at least a joint beyond mind when we touch hands.

 

Crap. I really should have split this off into a thread - so sorry, OP.

 

1. A laundry list of unrealistic needs but barely anything to offer

2. Happily accepts only the mainstream entertainment/art/food/thought thats handed to her....aka weak minded & generic

3. Incapable of getting dirty or wet /makeup all the time/heels all the time

4. Doesn't like animals

5. Blames others for her relationship shortcomings without reflecting

6. Complains and expects others to entertain her with no contribution from her.

7. Judges me for a lack of organized religion

8. Places her friend's opinions above her own or her man's without consideration of agenda.

I'll leave the visual stuff out. No need to go there :yawinkle:

 

lippy knows you like bushy eyebrows:smt061

 

Its well documented that i cant resist a woman with full natural brows 8)

 

Excellent list. Succinctly put.

 

If a woman is too clingy in the beginning.

If she gets dramatically upset over seemingly minor things.

I used to talk to this woman who when we text each other, she would already be sending another message before I got a chance to answer the previous message. And mind you I'm pretty quick with my phone and it has a qwerty keyboard. lol

Or when I didnt respond fast enough for her liking she would be all passive agressive saying things like "well I guess your busy, get back to me when your free", or "well I guess your tired, goodnight sweety". All I can do is just roll my eyes, like damn gimme a few to respond. Shits annoying.

Another red flag is some one talking about big future plans, after a short amount of time. Ive gone through this with other girls, but especially the before mentioned woman. She would say things like "I know Im gonna make you happy, Im gonna do whatever I can to keep you". Talking about children and what not. And we werent even official. She was about 8 years older than me, so that probably played a part in it.

It just puts me in a weird spot, where I have to either break it to you or go with it. And Im good at breaking it to em.

 

So what is the first date red flags?

Getting grabby immediately.
Say they want to go somewhere "private".
Talks excessively about an X, especially if there is clear anger there.
Talks immediately about a connection between you two.
Constantly checks messages.
Talks about themselves incessantly.
Drunk when you get there, lol. It's been awhile but it happened a long time ago, that was fuuuun. Not. (Houston)
Shows up on the first date in sweats and greasy hair (that happened too - in Seattle - and he light up a joint on our way out of the place).
Having halitosis... yes its sad, and I'm so scared I have it, my obsession. Constantly check my breath,

fuuuun

 

i'm sure all of the bolded bits apply to me when i stepped off that plane back in august

 

You didnt do any of that... but if you did, you had me at "hello"

I forgive you...LOL......Ill be drunk the next time:-D

 

Its only a skip, hop and jump down the I-10

 

At least you didn't have bad breath. It would have been over before it started. :smt089

 

LMWAO!!!

Good thing.. Listerine is.....

 

ahhhhh...that was after my long winded explanation about how you 'complete me'

 

i think the vodka and gin on the plane sorted that out

 

that was after we walked 2 miles to the liquor store that is only .5 miles away from my house....
HAHAHAHAH!!!

 

:smt043 And here the flight attendants thought you were merely trying to get drunk. They didn't know you were mixing you own "listerine".

 

lmao...!!! now that is a walk i will never forget:smt050